What do u guys make of this??

[Gina]

i posted a reply to foxy.. (does he need time or did he just dump me) i explained my situation i realized i shoulkd have made a new post

 

so if u want (i hope u do) go to my reply and read it

 

i REALLY need advice and opions and people to share there experiences so i dont feel like the only one in this position

 

hope to hear from u all

 

 

Gina

[Tony T]

The guy is just plain jerking you around. He may be fond of you but he is not nearly ready for a long term relationship and he is looking forward to seeing and being with others in the future before he makes the decision on a keeper.

 

He may not be such a bad guy and he may not be intentionally jerking you around. However, his head and your head are in two entirely different places. He enjoys your company, the sex, etc., but the relationship is not something he sees continuing into the future. On the other hand, you are looking long term and are hoping this will last.

 

I've seen this so very many times. If you stick around, you will be headed for severe heartbreak when he starts seeing other people. If he didn't have that in mind, he would have no problem committing to you.

 

If what you're looking for is a long term committed relationship, it's not going to happen with this guy. Spare your feelings, write him off and take some time to get over it.

 

All the facts are right in front of your face. I can certainly understand why you don't want to see them. When we really care about somebody we want to believe the best and we don't want to face reality. But go take a cold shower and come back and read this again. This guy is NOT a keeper. When some chick comes along at college or wherever that he takes a fancy too, you won't see him again until he needs you for something.

 

Hey, don't be mad at me. It's happened to me a lot more times than to you, believe me.

 

Be strong and don't let this guy keep you around for his own personal convenience. I'd say just be his friend but I don't think you are capable of that right now. It will be much better for you to stay away from him.

 

If it'll make you feel better, have one last talk with him and let him know what you want and how you feel. If he changes his tune, go for it. But I doubt he will.

[Gina]

thanks for responding so soon, all of ur points r good but, there is way more to the story. Before he and i got serious we were just messing around, and at that time it was me who wanted it that way, he let him self get close to me and i hurt him by finding someone new, we werent together and i did not let myself get emotionally close only physically. we got back together sometime after that and he insisted we get serious but i still wanted the casual thing. finaly in december i decided i would take the chance and take things to the next step. I found my self falling in love with him (the thing i was trying not to do)very fast after that and he felt the same way, actually longer than i did. He had made plans for the future that involved me and i was thrilled. I was finally happy and i felt safe, i felt asthough i would not lose him, i thought he would never give me up (which he hasnt, yet) so its a little more complex.. if you (tony) or anyone else has input feel free i love to hear from u

 

Thanx

 

Gina

The guy is just plain jerking you around. He may be fond of you but he is not nearly ready for a long term relationship and he is looking forward to seeing and being with others in the future before he makes the decision on a keeper.

 

He may not be such a bad guy and he may not be intentionally jerking you around. However, his head and your head are in two entirely different places. He enjoys your company, the sex, etc., but the relationship is not something he sees continuing into the future. On the other hand, you are looking long term and are hoping this will last. I've seen this so very many times. If you stick around, you will be headed for severe heartbreak when he starts seeing other people. If he didn't have that in mind, he would have no problem committing to you. If what you're looking for is a long term committed relationship, it's not going to happen with this guy. Spare your feelings, write him off and take some time to get over it. All the facts are right in front of your face. I can certainly understand why you don't want to see them. When we really care about somebody we want to believe the best and we don't want to face reality. But go take a cold shower and come back and read this again. This guy is NOT a keeper. When some chick comes along at college or wherever that he takes a fancy too, you won't see him again until he needs you for something.

 

Hey, don't be mad at me. It's happened to me a lot more times than to you, believe me. Be strong and don't let this guy keep you around for his own personal convenience. I'd say just be his friend but I don't think you are capable of that right now. It will be much better for you to stay away from him. If it'll make you feel better, have one last talk with him and let him know what you want and how you feel. If he changes his tune, go for it. But I doubt he will.

[BeenThere]

Gina, I think you have already gotten some excellent advice. Wouldn't change a word of Tony's post or even try to elaborate upon it. I'm only responding because it seems as if you've already made up your mind and are just not listening. Perhaps you are looking for reasons to hang on? So what is it exactly that you want to hear?

thanks for responding so soon, all of ur points r good but, there is way more to the story. Before he and i got serious we were just messing around, and at that time it was me who wanted it that way, he let him self get close to me and i hurt him by finding someone new, we werent together and i did not let myself get emotionally close only physically. we got back together sometime after that and he insisted we get serious but i still wanted the casual thing. finaly in december i decided i would take the chance and take things to the next step. I found my self falling in love with him (the thing i was trying not to do)very fast after that and he felt the same way, actually longer than i did. He had made plans for the future that involved me and i was thrilled. I was finally happy and i felt safe, i felt asthough i would not lose him, i thought he would never give me up (which he hasnt, yet) so its a little more complex.. if you (tony) or anyone else has input feel free i love to hear from u Thanx Gina

[Artlover]

I agree with Been There, Gina. I don't think your guy is just afraid, if that's what you're thinking (hoping?). I think he's over this and wants to keep his options open now. Two years is a long time to be in a casual situation with somebody. Perhaps there just wasn't enough there in the first place to move it to the next level. You say you didn't want to go for it at first and he did. Well, maybe you knew deep down it wouldn't work long term. I don't know.

 

What I do know is this: he's already told you how he really feels about your relationship and where it's headed. You can choose to open your eyes and see reality or you can stay in denial until he dumps you flat.

 

Do yourself and your self-esteen a favor and move on.

Gina, I think you have already gotten some excellent advice. Wouldn't change a word of Tony's post or even try to elaborate upon it. I'm only responding because it seems as if you've already made up your mind and are just not listening. Perhaps you are looking for reasons to hang on? So what is it exactly that you want to hear?