Stale relationship

[Lonely]

I've been going out w/my bf for 7 years. We still love each other and we are very comfortable with each other. But things are changing. There's no excitement or passion between us. We do the same thing every weekend. But he seems to be getting his excitement when he goes out with his friends.

 

I think about ending the relationship but we still love each other. We're just missing that excitment and passion. is anyone in the same position? Comments?

[Tony T]

Sounds like what they call the seven year itch. It happens to most couples, married or single. Just one of those facts of life.

 

There are relatively few couples, if any at all, who are able to retain that same excitement and fireworks which existed early on in the relationship. It's best if you don't even look for that to happen.

 

At this point, there should be some excitement and interest in the relationship and it should still be growing. There should be things you do together, good conversation, and a stability that makes both of you feel very secure.

 

Obviously something is missing here. You need to communicate with your boyfriend and let him know you want more out of the relationship than very predictable days and work something out between you to effect that. He should want the same.

 

If you find that he's quite happy with the way things are now, maybe he doesn't need as much stimulation as you do to be happy and fulfilled. Then you have a compatibility issue.

 

No matter who you're with, this issue is likely to surface after some years. However, as you get older you don't really look for the excitement you do when you're younger. But while you're young, go for the gusto. See what you can do with your guy and, if nothing, move on. Just remember, this is NOT a unique problem.

[Deep]

Sounds like what they call the seven year itch. It happens to most couples, married or single. Just one of those facts of life. There are relatively few couples, if any at all, who are able to retain that same excitement and fireworks which existed early on in the relationship. It's best if you don't even look for that to happen.

 

At this point, there should be some excitement and interest in the relationship and it should still be growing. There should be things you do together, good conversation, and a stability that makes both of you feel very secure. Obviously something is missing here. You need to communicate with your boyfriend and let him know you want more out of the relationship than very predictable days and work something out between you to effect that. He should want the same. If you find that he's quite happy with the way things are now, maybe he doesn't need as much stimulation as you do to be happy and fulfilled. Then you have a compatibility issue. No matter who you're with, this issue is likely to surface after some years. However, as you get older you don't really look for the excitement you do when you're younger. But while you're young, go for the gusto. See what you can do with your guy and, if nothing, move on. Just remember, this is NOT a unique problem.