demonspawn Posted February 13, 2006 Share Posted February 13, 2006 I just recently got dumped by a girl i had been with for a year and a few months, she says im a great guy and all(i treated her like a queen) but she says she loves me but is not in love with me. I told her why and she doesnt know why but she always did mention the good times we had when we first got together. Ive been hurting really bad lately, i know its normal and I know the step to recovery. But whats on my mind is IF there is a possibility to compromise something. I have been searching for answers lately on the why thing or what would be a good ice breaker for talking to her about this(we really didnt get closure, it was an over the fone breakup). Basically we had awesome dates when we first got together and the following 3 months after or so, but I noticed that the spark we had burnt out. She had said the other day on the fone that it doesnt take her long to fall for someone but we had been together for over a year and she still wasnt feeling it. I guess it was due to my insecurity/trust issues I had and it kind of pushed me away from her though I still wanted to be with her. I landed up spending 4 months or so with her while being insecure, it was hard but I hid it. During the 7 month mark i seeked consueling about it and it actually helped, but that spark was still gone. We basically spent the remainder of our months together but we didnt talk much about ourselves and our relationship, so im guessing thats why she couldnt fall for me. So in conclusion, I was wondering if it would be good to try and meet up and talk to her, but tell her what was it that made her happy when we first got with eachother, what I did to make her feel so happy during those times(she would mention it a lot on how good our first few dates were, but that something went wrong and it didnt feel the same), and if possible, if we can come to some sort of compromise with it and work it out. I love her so much and would do anything to work this out and compromise. Any advice would be greatly appreciated, thank you Link to post Share on other sites
Outcast Posted February 13, 2006 Share Posted February 13, 2006 There is nothing on God's green earth you can do to make a person love you. Unfortunately, the way of the world is that very often one person of a pair loves and the other doesn't. That's impossible to fix. It's one of the sad facts of life we all have to live with sometimes, unfortunately. What you need to do now is get on with the business of forgetting about her and moving on. Link to post Share on other sites
CaliGuy Posted February 13, 2006 Share Posted February 13, 2006 My guess is you were a bit too soft and clingy with her. Sounds like you were at least. You can't make her come back to you, you just have to work on your confidence and self-respect. Stick to NC and work on yourself to understand where the relationship went wrong. You might benefit from reading 'no more mr nice guy.' It explains why women dump nice men. Link to post Share on other sites
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