My longtime crush now has one on me. Need major assistance!

[Den1985]

Alright, I'll try to make this as short as possible:

Me and this girl (we'll call her Katie) have been working together for the past 3 and a half years. Since the very first time I met her I've pretty much been flat out crazy for her, I think it was infatuation at first. There have been other girls I've had interests in....but they never went anywhere because in my view they don't compare to Katie at all and I just couldn’t get past that. Well, a few months ago I made sort of a "turn-around". I was into drugs and was not being myself, and I have always been scared of expressing my feelings for any girl. Well the last couple of months I've just been myself, I've treated her just like I feel she should be treated. I send her texts every once in a while saying sweet things if she's had a bad day or whatever. She was feeling sick one day so I sent her "I hope you get to feeling better", things like that. All the replies she has sent back have all been good. I would always send the texts about 10 minutes after she would get off her shift. Well a week ago I was having a pretty crappy day, school and work both just kinda sucked. So she gets off work, I check my phone a little while later and I see that there’s a text from her saying "I hope you have a better day tomorrow : ) " Caught me off guard big time. Well a few days ago I was talking to a different co-worker and she told me that she was talking to Katie the day before and she mentioned that she has a crush on me! Here’s the biggest problem: She’s got a BF who IMO "buys her love". I've never been in a relationship, I've never wanted one until I met this girl but I feel this is the furthest I've ever been in this situation and I now have somewhat of a window. The thing I'm worried about the most is making things awkward if I do make a move, but if she has a crush on me also how do I keep this up and continue on to the next steps? I don't want to flat out ask her out, I guess my goal is to get to a point where it is shown by her that she has interests in me, and I'd take it from there. Any help? I can't get this situation outta my mind.

[Den1985]

Anybody? I can't get this outta my head, I don't think I've thought about anything else for the past 2 days.

[7on]

If she has a BF I wouldn't put much thought into it. I mean, tons of women have crushes on Brad Pitt but how many of them leave their husbands/BF for him? Probably a real extreme example, but anyway if she dumps the BF or if the BF dumps her then you'd probably have your limelight.

 

I wouldn't stop txting though - unless she says stop. It sounds like a good friendship - but I wouldn't put much thought beyond that atm.

[whichwayisup]

She cares for you, probably more than she should as she has a boyfriend. You don't want to ask her out, don't even 'go' there with her. The fact now that you know she has a crush on you too, should just make the friendship feel more solid. She knows she can rely on you and in the future if her relationship ends, chances are good that eventually when she's ready she'll be with you. Don't rush it and again, don't open up to her about how you feel. Not until the bf is out of the picture.

[Den1985]

Normally I would think that about the BF, just let it go until whatever happens. She has talked bad about him several times, and has even mentioned things about him "becoming broke" over the relationship. I really hate to jump to conclusions, but I honestly think she sees me as someone who truely cares about her, maybe differently than her bf, but I don't really know. It's just that I'm to a point I've always wanted to get to, and I would hate to waste this POSSIBLE window of opportunity just because of her BF.

[whichwayisup]

But he is a factor in this situation. She has to end it with him first. Sure, maybe she does see you as someone who truely cares about her...But that doesn't mean she is going to jump ship right now. If he that bad, and they have problems, let it end on it's own. You want the relationship to start off the right way.

[SuperMonk]

^ whichwayisup is right. Even if the relationship between her boyfriend is bad and she is flirting with you. She could be using you as her "teddy bear" - and if she indeed breaks up. In most cases the girl (even if she dates you) will see you as a friend than a lover. In other words a Rebound. You should do your own thing and if she does break it up with her current boyfriend, there has to be a 2-3 week waiting period before anything happens. Since she seems to be making the "moves" you almost don't have to do anything.

[Den1985]

Alright, things have gotten.....better. Now she is sending texts to me more than I am to her. I get one the other night saying "I am so glad I get to work with such a funny and sweet guy. You make the day bearable : )". Then the other night I was teaching this other girl I work with how to drive a 5 speed in my car (friend thing, nothing will happen, shes black, not my type at all not to sound racist) so yesterday morning I get a text from the girl "So you let everyone drive your car, when do I get to? : )". Any tips as to where to go from here?