e mailed i get the YES-but never go out

[joel]

why did this girl and also another girl similar to this one online wise-when u ask em out if they are interested-they say sure Yes, but when u do ask em its busy for today, next day , next wk-as in it never happens-u get the excuse like busy or what not, my question is why do they even bother saying YES-if they never plan on meeting up or dating you-so annoying -kinda of like a tease. a sample of my e mail i exchange wiht a gal i'm e mailed -chatted with her twice-shes not online a lot. she wasn;t hesitant in giving me her #, we did chat on the phone twice, ask her out on the 2nd call for a quick coffee or any non alcohlolic drink-very casual and nothin special-got the uhh uhh have to do something.

 

i got a feeling that i'm gettin the run around and its not just her another girl online wise is liek this "sure we can go out" you now what i really got a feelin its a NO.

 

it not just online ppl but real ppl wise to-promise one thing and it never happens. soooo annoying it like they playin with ur feeling or what not

any suggestions.

[Mary3]

Would you expect her to say " Um, no I don't want to go out with you " . Most girls won't really say something that sounds that rude so they say Sure but they stall and don't really want to go out.

 

I personally~ being put on the spot and not interested just say : Well I will have to get back to you about that " . (You are not committing to a specific date...)

 

I would next time ask if they would like to go out on a friday and if they say yes , then pick a time .

 

I think your confidance and delivery are important. If you don't feel confidant then a girl picks that up right away.

[erika2610]

Would you expect her to say " Um, no I don't want to go out with you " . Most girls won't really say something that sounds that rude so they say Sure but they stall and don't really want to go out.

 

I personally~ being put on the spot and not interested just say : Well I will have to get back to you about that " . (You are not committing to a specific date...)

 

I would next time ask if they would like to go out on a friday and if they say yes , then pick a time .

 

I think your confidance and delivery are important. If you don't feel confidant then a girl picks that up right away.

 

That's the problem. If you have read any of Joel's posts, you'd see he just has NO confidence whatsoever. I've told him before that's his problem..

[Hungryhorse]

Hi Joel, don't worry I wouldn't take the internet too seriously as there are an awful lot of timewasters on there, the internet is littered with them, there could be any number of reasons for a girl not wanting to meet up and I am pretty sure very few of them have to do with you. They could be doing it for an ego boost or be married. I have two or three times been phoned by a guy on the internet who doesn't ever ask me out, despite my having a first class photo being very pleasant, positive and friendly, asking him questions, etc, I have racked my brain as to why this could be but I can't find an answer, it certainly isn't based on any chemistry as they have never met me!

 

Guess Mary3 is right vagueness is unfortunately a polite way of saying no. In real life you could, if she says yes, follow this up with a what day are you free? as others have suggested, but if she won't commit to anything after this I would move on, you deserve better

[SmoochieFace]

Would you expect her to say " Um, no I don't want to go out with you " . Most girls won't really say something that sounds that rude so they say Sure but they stall and don't really want to go out.

 

Why is saying that rude?

[joel]

Would you expect her to say " Um, no I don't want to go out with you " . Most girls won't really say something that sounds that rude so they say Sure but they stall and don't really want to go out.

 

I personally~ being put on the spot and not interested just say : Well I will have to get back to you about that " . (You are not committing to a specific date...)

 

I would next time ask if they would like to go out on a friday and if they say yes , then pick a time .

 

I think your confidance and delivery are important. If you don't feel confidant then a girl picks that up right away.

 

well i just phone em or e mail em and talk -make small talk about whats with skool or work-she works in retail , and i'll talk about that. i tell her about my classes and midterms and what not and interests-gym, movies...etc

confidence i'm not sure what u mean i try to be it-i'm just who i am and then i just ask em if they wanna meet up for coffee or lunch-very casual and nothin serious.

i dontl; want to waste any time -just get it over with-ask her and if she says no or yes just go with it-at least i now.

[Mary3]

Confidance is knowing that your delivery is going to reap a nice date. Believing she will say Yes and making plans. Its a self assuredness thats hard to explain.

 

But if you delivery is like this :" Um hey, yea I was wondering....um...well you probrobly don't want to go but I was wondering if you would want to catch a movie sometime ( Wrong ! Give a specific day and time ) .

 

Better : Hey Lisa I was wondering if you wanted to go see King Kong tomorrow nite at the Cineplex ? " If she tells you to get lost well then you have your answer....

[Strawberrytallcake]

You know, this could have nothing to do with you. I did this (I confess) to a few guys. When it came time to actually set a date, I totally wigged out. IT had nothing to do with the guy. I had been in a bad relationship and everytime I thought I was ready to get back in the saddle - I panicked, made excuses and dodged phone calls.

 

Yes, I did realize I was being a jerk and now I just tell men that ask me out that I don't date - I am on a dating break. They still take it personally and think I just don't want to go out with them, but at least I know I am being honest!