Once hot, now cold

[Moises]

I have been crazy about my best female friend for years now. I told her how I felt around a year ago. She said that we would only be friends. It sucked but I moved on. We still kept contact over the phone and text. To make a long story short, lately we have been talking a lot and we went out together. We were hanging around more this month than we ever did this whole past year. Well she told me that she is starting to see me as more than a friend. For a week or so we would talk everyday over the phone and she would flirt with me. We would met every other day on her lunch break. She says that she really enjoys going out with me and I invite her out all the time, but she is always dissing me. She says that she is not doing it intentionally but that she has legit reasons for not going places with me. What gives? It's been only 3 weeks since she said that she was seeing me more than a friend. I don't want to give up, but I feel like a moron whenever I invite her out and I get shot down. I even asked her if she regretted telling me how she was feeling and she said that she didn't at all. Is she playing hard to get or has she gone from hot to cold in these last two weeks? Frustrating

[Mary3]

I think she likes the power trip of messing with your head. I would move on.

[fraidycat]

Well, I'd say she's playing "I need to grow up". Sounds like the mysterious girls who don't know what they really want syndrome. In which case- she has some growing up to do either way. I wouldn't put a lot of hope or investing into the two of you becoming more than friends just for the simple fact that every man should know that some women often are led by feelings and emotions and those can be fickle and fleeting.The women who are led in this manner are easy to pick out- they are always changing their minds and atitudes about serious subjects like romantic partners and men they are interested in. If you like getting hurt and tinkered around then by all means persue this girl, if you'd like to find a girl who's mature and knows what she wants and isn't afraid to be there when she wants you..then m

[Almost]

You say you invite her out all the time. Can you give us a few examples of how you have invited her out?

 

It would be great to know what you were doing together before she told you that she was starting to see you as more than a friend, and what you have been asking her out on since then. You said talking on the phone and meeting up with her for lunch breaks. Anything else?

[InTheWeirdZone]

You say that she is dissing you and has legitimate reasons. Do you know what these reasons are? Are they truthful pre planned reasons or is she making them up as she goes. When she does diss your date, does she suggest another time or date or just drops it?

 

From your e-mail it sounds like you know each others personal lives fairly well, could she just be really busy right now?

 

I hate to sound like such an optimistic person, but would hate for you to question her motives if she truly does want to be with you but just can not adjust her life 180 degrees yet.

 

It has only been two weeks since she changed her "temp". I would give it some time and step back a little. Maybe you need to be busy once or twice when she wants to get together. Remind her just how much she wants you.