Guest Posted March 10, 2006 Share Posted March 10, 2006 My wife and I recently seperated. She told me she is not sure if she loves me anymore she also said shes not sure if shes atracted to me. we have three kids and she had the first one when she was 18 she said she feel s like she has missed out on life. she said she wants to be seperated for a while so she can decide if Im the right one for her or not. And this one killed me she is a manager at a local resturant and she works alot of hours and when shes not at work her employees are calling her constantly. i told her I felt like she loved her job more than she loved me her responce was she didnt know if she loved me more than her job. She told me that her job is her life. i am really confused because i thought we had a great relationship we very seldom fight or argue. In the 7 years weve been together I can count our fights on 1 hand. I feel like she keeps trying to push me further away since weve been seperated. she keeps telling me I need to explore my options by going out and dating other people. so I can figure out if shes the right one for me. Like I told her if i didnt think she was the right one I wouldnt have married her. I love this woman more than anything in the world and its killing me to know she feels this way. she also told me that it was nothing I did to make her feel this way that its just her. I am really confused and hurting any advise would be really appreciated thanks for your time Link to post Share on other sites
greenshift Posted March 14, 2006 Share Posted March 14, 2006 I'm taking a huge intuitive leap here, so take this with a grain of salt: If she wants you to see other people, it's because she is either A) ALREADY seeing someone else (any coworkers that come to mind?), or B) wants to immediately. You're letting her dictate terms to you. If you start dating, she won't have to feel guilty for her own indiscretions. Go to a counselor, ASAP, and be prepared to find out some things that you don't want to know. Link to post Share on other sites
tikigods Posted March 14, 2006 Share Posted March 14, 2006 I agree with Green, I think she wants you to start dating so she can feel good about doing it herself (if she hasn't already) It sounds to me that your wife has made some choices that she now is realizing made a huge impact on her life, having a child early, really did mean that she missed out on a lot of the growing up (Are you the father of that child? ) How old was she when you got married? I think that she wants to finally live those lost 18-20something years that she never had a chance to, and you are in teh way of that. Link to post Share on other sites
scobro Posted March 15, 2006 Share Posted March 15, 2006 my wife said the same thing and there was someone else in the picture.I would be pretty sure she either is seeing someone or wants to.Sorry:( Link to post Share on other sites
Sassy Posted March 15, 2006 Share Posted March 15, 2006 my wife said the same thing and there was someone else in the picture.I would be pretty sure she either is seeing someone or wants to.Sorry:( Totally agree with scobro. When someone says they need space or time to figure out things ,it is because they have someone else. Link to post Share on other sites
REDRUM Posted March 15, 2006 Share Posted March 15, 2006 Sounds very similar to what happened to me. My wife basically told me she didn't know if she is in love with me. She loves me, but just doesn't know if she's "in love" with me. She made similar comments about moving on & seeing other people if I wanted that she can't stop me from that & it would be on her anyway. Well I didn't think she could see someone else & that she just needed her space. Come to find out she started seeing her best friend who is openly gay. By the way she was pregnant with our 2nd child whom we lost this weekend:( may her little soul rest in peace... Link to post Share on other sites
destination_unknown Posted March 15, 2006 Share Posted March 15, 2006 Redrum, I am so sorry for your and your wifes loss. You are in my prayers. Link to post Share on other sites
REDRUM Posted March 15, 2006 Share Posted March 15, 2006 Redrum, I am so sorry for your and your wifes loss. You are in my prayers. Thank you very much I appreciate it. Link to post Share on other sites
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