she wants me back, but im not sure

[emc]

I dated my ex for over 3 years. we started in high school, now shes a senior in HS and im a sophomore in college (2 hours long distance. we only used to see each other every couple weeks).

 

She broke up with me. It kinda came out of nowhere. We were planning on sticking through it all and getting married, (i know it sounds naieve). Her reaons had to do with the long distance, and that the relationship seemed to be "going through the motions". She also was just started on a new medication for depression (i think it might have had a part to play cause they kept increasing her dosage over a short period of time). now, a few months later, she wants to get back together. shes apologized, and we both found out that we want to see each other again.

 

The problem is she took a vow of chastity last month. Its a vow that theres basically no action below the belt. I know that right now i cant handle this. I've been trying to avoid any decision because im trying to figure out what to do myself, but im running short on time. I respect her vow so much that i dont want to date her again only to break her heart, as well as i dont want to end up feeling miserable. even though we both want to get married, theres no chance of that happening for at least 3+ years (due to college), otherwise i would really consider making that sacrifice.

 

My question now. Is it possible for someone who feels a need for a physical relationship to let go of it? and, is this something i should even be considering in the first place.

the people i talk to generally say the typical "you need to be happy" and things like that, but the problem is im happy with her, but im not happy without sexual expression. I want to be just happy with her, and not have to worry about the other part, and i dont know what to do, if its even possible for me to be like that, etc. I'm also worried if say 6 months or a year down the line it all the sudden becomes too much to handle. Any advice?

[whats wrong with me]

bumping your thread.

[weez]

some may disagree.. but sexual compatibility (mostly with how much you want vs. how much she wants) is a somewhat important part of a relationship that wants to make a run for the long haul. 9 times out of 10.. if one partner wants it much more often than the other.. this leads to eventual infidelity.

 

if you know that you can't handle this, then that's a dealbreaker. no matter how important this person is to you, if you can't manage to keep yourself in the relationship because of the lifestyle choices the other person makes, you need to save you AND her the pain of eventual breakup because of it.