Minnaar Posted March 18, 2006 Share Posted March 18, 2006 Last week my fiance and I were talking and he asked out of the blue. "Do you ever have any qualms about the size of your diamond?" I was like shocked a lil at first, and asked why he would think something like that. He replied, "Well all the females in the office and those that come in are always going on and on about large diamond engagement rings." (My engagement ring is very special to me. He made it at our family's jewelry store. it is a 1/3 carat and the diamond was once his mothers) He said that if he had thought about it a lil more he would have talked with my father and gotten a much larger one for a decent price. It could have been a much larger one he said. I didn't care about the size, the cut, the clarity, the amount of gold used.. I don't understand what bothers him. Any input would be much appreciated. Thankies.. Minn<3 Link to post Share on other sites
tigger Posted March 18, 2006 Share Posted March 18, 2006 Unfortunatly, there are so many women out there that are all about the size of the diamond. For me, it's about the thought that went into it, and he sincerely put a lot of thought into yours. That is so wonderful. The women at work - ah....they might talk the big talk, but when it came down to it, those who aren't out there for the size, but are out there for the love would absolutely cherish the ring you have, and the thought put into it. You are very lucky. It's too bad society can even screw up something as precious as an engagement ring. Link to post Share on other sites
amaysngrace Posted March 18, 2006 Share Posted March 18, 2006 i have to agree with tigger. what he did was so sweet. he put a lot of thought into your ring. he showed you how much he loves and respects you by giving you his mother's stone. their's might be bigger but yours is worth more. Link to post Share on other sites
JayKay Posted March 18, 2006 Share Posted March 18, 2006 Diamonds don't matter. Period. Link to post Share on other sites
bab Posted March 18, 2006 Share Posted March 18, 2006 (My engagement ring is very special to me. He made it at our family's jewelry store. it is a 1/3 carat and the diamond was once his mothers) That's so incredibly more special and romantic than anything else he could've come up with. Tell him we all think it's wonderful. I could be wrong but I bet the women at the office would trade a 1 or 2 carat diamond for a 1/3 carat diamond that had such family significance. Link to post Share on other sites
luvtoto Posted March 18, 2006 Share Posted March 18, 2006 A gold band is more symbolic of marriage IMO. But, if I *had* to go with a diamond I would be happy with a CZ diamond ring. They are simply gorgeous!! Can't even tell the difference...except in the pocket book. Why the heck pay thousands of dollars for a ring that could be bought instead for a couple of hundred. You really can't tell the difference anyway. No one would ever know if you didn't tell them. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Minnaar Posted March 18, 2006 Author Share Posted March 18, 2006 I agree what he did was heartfelt and wonderful. He is a very sweet man. I just don't understand why he feels my ring is inadequate. It is almost as if he regrets the ring in some way. He once told me to stop feeling as though he was settling. Due to a different matter entirely of coure. I felt that I was second choice as he was seeing someone when we met. No I was not the other woman, but we did get together after the break up. He said if he were settling, or only wanted the superficial appearance of the "Model type" than would I really want to be with him? Isn't that in some way kind of what he is asking about my ring? I mean if I were superficial to the point of wanting a bigger diamond in my ring, and not absolutely adore the one I have, why would he want to be with someone like that? His other reason for asking the question about my having qualms about my ring is. I am a jewelry designer, and he said that giving me jewelry is like giving Picasso a picture you had drawn. I guess he doesn't understand the emotion maybe? I don't know but I'll be damned if he is getting me to wear another ring /e grabs her ring and squeels "it's mine, mine, mine" Thanks for you imput everyone. Minn<3 Link to post Share on other sites
amaysngrace Posted March 18, 2006 Share Posted March 18, 2006 minaarr...it all sounds like wedding jitters to me. when is the Big Day? Link to post Share on other sites
MusicWoman Posted March 18, 2006 Share Posted March 18, 2006 I'm allergic to almost everything....because of this my fiancee wanted me to come pick out a ring with him. He said that he wanted me to have something I was in love with since it would be on my finger for a very long time:) Yes, I have three stones....but the middle one is only 1/3 of a carrot and not by his choice. I work with my hands all the time...I'm a musician...and I know if I was to take off the ring while playing I'd end up loosing it. 1 carrot even looks HUGE on the hand if you think about it. Link to post Share on other sites
jerbear Posted March 18, 2006 Share Posted March 18, 2006 There are women out there that are for the minimum size of the diamond and follow the strict rule of 3 months salary (gross not net) it is great that he feels the way he feels. Not many men are like him. willing and wanting something larger. You know, one day he may get you a 3 carat when you pass the ring to your oldest kid for his/her wedding ring. Link to post Share on other sites
No Stress Lady Posted March 18, 2006 Share Posted March 18, 2006 Last week my fiance and I were talking and he asked out of the blue. "Do you ever have any qualms about the size of your diamond?" I was like shocked a lil at first, and asked why he would think something like that. He replied, "Well all the females in the office and those that come in are always going on and on about large diamond engagement rings." (My engagement ring is very special to me. He made it at our family's jewelry store. it is a 1/3 carat and the diamond was once his mothers) He said that if he had thought about it a lil more he would have talked with my father and gotten a much larger one for a decent price. It could have been a much larger one he said. I didn't care about the size, the cut, the clarity, the amount of gold used.. I don't understand what bothers him. Any input would be much appreciated. Thankies.. Minn<3 Your engagement ring sounds wonderful - I love the fact that his mother's diamond is in it. He sounds like a sweetheart and you just need to tell him you love your engagement ring. Personally I think large diamonds are tacky, far better to have something small and simple - so no, the size of the diamond doesn't matter one bit!!!!! I specifically told my bf I wanted a small diamond and he bought me a beautiful elegant ring which I absolutely love !!!!!! Link to post Share on other sites
alphamale Posted March 18, 2006 Share Posted March 18, 2006 I didn't care about the size, the cut, the clarity, the amount of gold used.. The fact that you even posted about this subject implies that it is an issue for both you and him.... In addition, if your family is in the jewelry business you should have a 3 carat flawless diamond on your finger, mainly cause you don't have to pay the 300% markup. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Minnaar Posted March 18, 2006 Author Share Posted March 18, 2006 We haven't set one yet. in fact he doesn't want to have a wedding right now. He wants to do the courthouse thing and have a real wedding later. So not sure when it is going to happen. Minn<3 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Minnaar Posted March 18, 2006 Author Share Posted March 18, 2006 The fact that you even posted about this subject implies that it is an issue for both you and him.... No it is not an issue about the size. The issue is that he feels odd about it. Our situation is odd enough already without adding more odditites into it. In addition, if your family is in the jewelry business you should have a 3 carat flawless diamond on your finger, mainly cause you don't have to pay the 300% markup. My mom doesn't even have a large diamond, hers is 1.5 carats and not flawless, in fact I would have to classify it as an I2 J. In fact we really don't like the look of flawless diamonds. My favorite is the I2 filled with carbon in inclusions to look like a grey robins egg. I have only seen one in my life and am still looking for another. But thank you for your imput Alpha. Minn<3 Link to post Share on other sites
ladyinwaiting Posted March 19, 2006 Share Posted March 19, 2006 Does the size of the diamond matter? Imho, no. In fact, the only thing a large diamond says to me is that the guy who gave it probably has more money than sense, a small ego that needs inflating, or poor money management skills. But that's just me. I know a lot of women think otherwise, and do believe that a big ring is symbolic of the strength of the relationship. This makes sense in a historical context: women recieved everything through the generosity of their menfolk, so a miserly husband-to-be was a concern. It's outdated now, though, and I thinkg women who cling to that belief are a little sad. Still, the diamond companies have a great advertising campaign. It was focused as much at men as women, and it's probably got to your boyfriend too. Don't know what you can do to reassure him, but he sounds like a sweetie, so congrats Link to post Share on other sites
catgirl1927 Posted March 20, 2006 Share Posted March 20, 2006 I love diamonds. LOVE them. I love big diamonds. It's the Southern Belle in me, I can practically SMELL them. The sight of them makes my heart skip a beat. That said, no, the size of the rock should not matter if you are in love. Any girl who says "My minimum is this" is very materialistic and not really about love. There is a hugely ridiculous markup on diamonds. Most of my friends have 2 carats or more. My boyfriend wants me to have a ring that big, because it's important to him. I'm not going to lie, I would LOVE to have one. Enough that I wouldn't mind helping to pay for it. If she loves great big diamonds as much as I do, she should buy them herself. What no one seems to realize is that they are sparklier if you buy them for yourself. Link to post Share on other sites
No Stress Lady Posted March 20, 2006 Share Posted March 20, 2006 I love diamonds. LOVE them. I love big diamonds. It's the Southern Belle in me, I can practically SMELL them. The sight of them makes my heart skip a beat. That said, no, the size of the rock should not matter if you are in love. Any girl who says "My minimum is this" is very materialistic and not really about love. There is a hugely ridiculous markup on diamonds. Most of my friends have 2 carats or more. My boyfriend wants me to have a ring that big, because it's important to him. I'm not going to lie, I would LOVE to have one. Enough that I wouldn't mind helping to pay for it. If she loves great big diamonds as much as I do, she should buy them herself. What no one seems to realize is that they are sparklier if you buy them for yourself. Great post Catgirl!!!!!!!!!!!! Made me smile :) Link to post Share on other sites
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