xxbaddgurl83xx Posted March 21, 2006 Share Posted March 21, 2006 My ex boyfriend and I have been broken up for a little over a month. I am the one who ended the relationship but now I'm having doubts. We've been together for over three years and this is not the first time we have broken up. The reason our relationship ended is because he found out that I cheated on him. However he wanted to stick together and try to work things out. Well after months of trying to work things out and him constantly putting me down and calling me names I decided that I just couldn't deal with it anymore so I ended the relationship. Now I am wondering if I made the right choice. He always tells me that I am running from my problems and I'm starting to wonder if he is right. I want to be with him but I can't tolerate the constant put downs. I know that I hurt him and it will take a long time for him to move past this, if ever, but I can't deal with the name calling and arguing almost every single day. He hasn't shown me that things will be better if I come back. Even now broken up when we talk he still has to put me down for the cheating. Its hard because I love him so much and I really would like to spend the rest of my life with him but I shouldn't feel like I am losing my self worth by sticking with him either. But I want to be with him. I long to be with him. Its almost like I am addicted to him. No matter how angry he makes me and no matter how many times I leave I always come back hoping that one day things will be normal. I keep telling him that I need this time apart to focus on myself and to find out who exactly I am. I mean I'm only 22 years old and I've been with him since I was 19. He tells me that I just want to party and live the single life which is why I broke up with him. Thats not true but I don't know how to make him think otherwise. Should I give it another shot with him or should I just move on despite how much I want to be with him deep down. Link to post Share on other sites
WiseNitchie Posted March 31, 2006 Share Posted March 31, 2006 Yes i feel that you should give it another try, jsut be warned that you gone have to work extra hard to make up waht you did to him, but have faith it will be ok, i think you should sit him down and explain to him, that he's all you want and no onelse, he seems to be unsure about your relationship , so try ot make him understand. Link to post Share on other sites
riobikini Posted March 31, 2006 Share Posted March 31, 2006 If a relationship (person) makes you feel 'bad' aka an unworthy object...avoid all the possibilities....leave it (him) alone. Seek better. -Rio Link to post Share on other sites
WiseNitchie Posted April 3, 2006 Share Posted April 3, 2006 Only get back with him, if its worth holding on too, if not the dont bother, make sure he and you are both fully into making your relationship work, you have to talk to him to settle your problems, one of the main problems with relationships is that people keep stuff bottled in, release your feelings and everything will be good. Link to post Share on other sites
imhornydad Posted April 4, 2006 Share Posted April 4, 2006 i know the name calling is intolerable, but hey, you cheated on him. to pull a stunt like that would take a lot to gain his trust again. "I keep telling him that I need this time apart to focus on myself and to find out who exactly I am." "He tells me that I just want to party and live the single life which is why I broke up with him." he doesn't just jump to conclusions that are completely bollocks. instead of what you said, you could have said something similar another way, maybe, "i think we need some time apart so we can both focus on certain things and maybe get back together at another point in time. we can't focus on our relationship right now because we're both blinded by the pain that we caused each other." no offense, i don't think you should get together again with him at this point in time even though you say you love him. it would be a waste of time for both of you. you've hurt him and as a result, he's hurting you. i think the only way that would erase the hurt is if both of you took time apart from each other, but make it clear to him that you are not doing this to "party and live the single life". that only reinforces the fact that you cheated on him. then when enough time has passed and no one is hurt, you can try to make the relationship work again. best of luck to you. Link to post Share on other sites
CaliGuy Posted April 4, 2006 Share Posted April 4, 2006 He's never going to forget you cheated on him and I think in the long run it would be hard for you to regain his trust. If I were you, I'd try and focus on why you cheated because if you did it to him there is a chance you will do it to someone else. Let him go to find someone new where there are no trust issues. Link to post Share on other sites
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