Tell her or not??!!

[Bobby]

i've been admiring one of my female friends for a few years already. She's the kind of girl i really like. I knew from the beginning that she had a close bf already. I'm not the kind of person who like to chase an attached girl so i didn't make any obvious moves. We did have casual one on one meetings like going to lunch, etc. and exchanged email quite often.We get along very well when we are together. I know both of us enjoyed each other's company very much. i paid very close attention to any signs from her but i didn't see anything that resembles romantic feelings from her. I think she sees me as a very good friend. She got married with her boyfriend a while ago. All I did was to congratulate her. I haven't seen her for a while and recently i'm having a few chances to see her again and all the feelings bubbled up from deep inside. She seems to be quite happily married and I have no intention to do anything to change it in anyway. However, with the recently tragedy and emails i've received about telling someone your feelings or there may not be a chance later on, I just don't know if i should tell her about my feelings. I'm sure it won't change anything concrete but i'm worried that it'll put a burden on her. Will it ruin our friendship if i tell her? Should i tell her the truth or keep the secret forever? thanks for your advice!

[Tony T]

Of course it will absolutely ruin your friendship. You really have a great sense of timing??? If you were going to tell her your feelings you should have done so well before she became happily married.

 

Now, leave her alone. I also suggest you ease off your friendship with her so your feelings can change and you will be free to focus your romantic feelings in another direction.

 

I cannot believe you would even think of telling her anything like this now. It would be insane to even hint that you have feelings for her at this time. That would not only be destructive to your friendship but it would be cruel to her and yourself as well.

 

Stay away from her and turn your attention to nice, single ladies.

[sparkle]

I totally agree with Tony. Don't tell her your feelings.

 

She is married now. Leave her alone. Get those feelings out of your mind and don't burden her with them. You need to chase after SINGLE chicks from now on.

[Mary]

Why dont you tell her your feelings before she got married? I have no idea why you can keep this to yourself so many years

 

Maybe she also loves you as well, all she was doing was to wait for you to tell her how important she is in your heart

 

I ask you now, if the war breaks out and you know that you may die , or within a week there will be the end of the world, will you tell her what you think?

 

Or let me put in this way- if u are sick will you let her know , or will you want to see her before you die?

 

If you think yes, probably she is one of the most important ppl in your life. So why not let her know?

 

Please, dont be a croward. You have missed the chance

 

Please comment

Of course it will absolutely ruin your friendship. You really have a great sense of timing??? If you were going to tell her your feelings you should have done so well before she became happily married.

 

Now, leave her alone. I also suggest you ease off your friendship with her so your feelings can change and you will be free to focus your romantic feelings in another direction. I cannot believe you would even think of telling her anything like this now. It would be insane to even hint that you have feelings for her at this time. That would not only be destructive to your friendship but it would be cruel to her and yourself as well. Stay away from her and turn your attention to nice, single ladies.

[Tony T]

This post does not compute.

 

This woman is married and has a right to be left alone, particularly from friends who want to profess their love. That's the last thing a happily married woman wants to hear about.

 

You got this all wrong!!!

[HillBilly]

I hate to tell you, but I think it would be a bad idea to tell her. I have someone similar in my life (that I really like). She is single, but I am attached. I think telling someone something like that will only hurt the friendship. Just try to bury some of the feelings and be the best of friends possible..... If you want her as a partner, then you must love her as a friend.