is he just scared or what?

[elisabeth160]

There's this guy at my work that I've talked to only a few times. I thought he was cute, but thought he'd never go for me so I never gave it a second thought. Well he went to a mutual friend of ours at work and said he'd like to take me to dinner and if I was up to go with him. I said sure, but he never directly asked me himself. He'd ask her about me and what I said and she would try to get him to talk to me, but he was so shy about it. So I went up to him finally and said what's up. He couldn't decide where to go and was sooo shy with me.

The day came when we were suppose 2 go and he hadn't made a decision or said nething to me so I forgot about it. Then he finally came 2 me the next day and asked what happened to our date. I told him he never said nething to me. And that was it.

My question is since he was so shy about it, should I approach him about it. I'm usually the shy one, so its hard. He's cute and I'd like to, but I don't wanna come off to strong or to eager.

Help guys!

Thanks!

[amerikajin]

Yeah, he's scared - too afraid of rejection to ask you out.

 

Is this the kind of guy you want to date? 'Cause it seems like you'll be doing most of the work. Not saying don't date him, but just think about what kind of project you'd be taking on here.

[Lucasarts]

seems like a perfect fit here imo

 

both of you are shy people and this relationship can help ease any fears and qualms about the opposite sex

 

working towards getting what you want is a part of life, and if your willing to try with this guy you need to help him break down the barriers that he has around himself. You need to straight up tell him that you like him, and that you would like to do/go anywhere/anything with him anytime he wants to. In essence you need to help raise his self-confidence, and it will help raise yours as well. If he is attractive, then you must be attractive too or appealing, which isnt a bad thing to realize huh?

 

anyways i would just grab the bull by the horns and tell him that you like him and that you want to do something with him. Even go as far as setting up the date. But only the first date, he has to realize that in order to be a proper gentleman he needs to take the initiative after you give him the first push.

[SuperMonk]

seems like a perfect fit here imo

 

both of you are shy people and this relationship can help ease any fears and qualms about the opposite sex

 

working towards getting what you want is a part of life, and if your willing to try with this guy you need to help him break down the barriers that he has around himself. You need to straight up tell him that you like him, and that you would like to do/go anywhere/anything with him anytime he wants to. In essence you need to help raise his self-confidence, and it will help raise yours as well. If he is attractive, then you must be attractive too or appealing, which isnt a bad thing to realize huh?

 

anyways i would just grab the bull by the horns and tell him that you like him and that you want to do something with him. Even go as far as setting up the date. But only the first date, he has to realize that in order to be a proper gentleman he needs to take the initiative after you give him the first push.

 

I disagree, I think you're seeing this from a viewpoint of a mommy helping the little boy to his first day at school. If a guy's gotta hold mommy's hand before he has to do anything, Is that how he is in life? he has to ask SOMEONE else or WAIT for someone else to help him out. Patience and indifference is one thing, but inactivity is another.

[ratzskinakie]

I say you should go for it, that kid sounds like me of when I was young and shypid. Girls would approach me and ask me out back then, Id do stupid things but in the long run it would help me out. also it would help my ego, knowing that girls found me attractive enough, they go out of their way to ask me out, was a awsome thought for me.

 

Though you shouldent expect anything great, he may turn out to be a "nice guy" and be too worried through out the whole date on things on like "what should I say?, what should I like? what should I do? what should l look at?, etc..." or maybe he may open up. He may find you imatating, but in the end I think you both would learn something from this.

[Lucasarts]

I disagree, I think you're seeing this from a viewpoint of a mommy helping the little boy to his first day at school. If a guy's gotta hold mommy's hand before he has to do anything, Is that how he is in life? he has to ask SOMEONE else or WAIT for someone else to help him out. Patience and indifference is one thing, but inactivity is another.

 

well thats the thing, you're seeing this in the "macho man" light where a guy should always take the initiative from the very beginning. How very stereotypical.

 

But in reality not every guy has the confidence, swagger and self-esteem to smooth talk a girl he likes and ask her out. Thats just not how EVERY GUY works these days. I doubt u were some smooth, charming player when u asked your first girl out. If you were, well good for you, but that doesnt mean that every guy is like you.

 

We all had to start somewhere, and if this guy can't get a helping hand then, well he's gonna be best friends with his hands for a long time until then. Its also easier said than done to become more confident and comfortable with yourself around girls; it takes time, effort, rejections, and etc. Unless this guy is in his twenties and still shy around girls, i would give him the light of day...who knows what he's like once hes able to lighten up and open up to u. The physical attraction is obviously there, lets see if theres a more intimate personal one as well.