whereismylifegoing Posted March 28, 2006 Share Posted March 28, 2006 Wow it's been such a long time since i have posted on this site! i just wanted to let everybody know that everybody deserves a second chance and no more. Me and my girl have been getting along just fine and i hope that things will keep going the way that they are. i just took her on a cruise to the bahamas and we had a blast. also i have changed alot since our breakup. i pay more attention to her and she isn't as selfish as she was. NOW............ i wonder if i should get married to her. i have been dating her for 6yrs and do you think it would be too soon to ask......or do you think i should give it some more time? i mean i know i want to but and i also know what i feel is best for me, but we broke up seven months ago and things feel good. any advice? for all the people who are waiting around for their second chance........DON'T. i didn't. and it drove me crazy for a while but i finally realized life is the most important thing. this is going to sound stupid but if you don't love yourself, why would you love somebody else. love yourself first. forget about your ex and go about life. people have to make choices on what they want in life. my girlfriend made her choice and everything is working out. i made my choice to take her back. but i sure as hell didn't wait around for her. i wasted countless days and nights wondering what was going to happen. (just read my posts!) and it got me to the bar, s***faced everynight. when i started to realize life is good with or without her, i had felt great about just being alive. i started to do better at work. made more money than i had ever imagined. met tons of people. had my share of dates. things just got better. so keep your heads up! and don't sleep around for two reasons 1. it's just nasty and 2. it doesn't do a damn thing for helping you cope with losing your significant other. believe me. Link to post Share on other sites
KittenMoon Posted March 28, 2006 Share Posted March 28, 2006 It's really nice to see one of these stories every once in a while. I have a feeling that you're going to hear a lot of cautions on the marriage thing- I'd wait another six months or so to make sure you guys don't slide into old patterns. Maybe go to some couples counseling as well- not because things are going bad, but instead to just air out any old feelings and pre-empt any falling into old patterns. I hope things go well. Link to post Share on other sites
Author whereismylifegoing Posted March 29, 2006 Author Share Posted March 29, 2006 i don't use therapy:rolleyes: but thanks for the advice Link to post Share on other sites
KittenMoon Posted March 29, 2006 Share Posted March 29, 2006 I don't mean like "fix your life" therapy. More like "discuss what went wrong in the first place with an objective moderator" therapy. Just an idea- to sort of head off any potential problems at the pass or to discuss the "little things" like leaving the toilet seat up or not tossing out the old milk container. I think pre-emptive therapy can be a good idea- why only address problems when they become troublesome? A little nurturing now could go a long way to avoiding bad stuff in the future. Link to post Share on other sites
coasting Posted March 29, 2006 Share Posted March 29, 2006 I am glad to see things are going well for you! I too, just got my second chance with the man I love with all of my heart. It has only been three weeks since we have been back together, after an almost 4 month break up and him moving in with another woman. I am not going to say things are great, as I am still very cautous and will be for a long time. We both see our own therapist and have agreed to go see another one together, so we don't fall back into the old habits. I think the biggest mistake anyone can make after reuniting with their past love, is to compare or talk about the relationship they were involved in while they were away. In order for things to work out you need to leave the past in the past, as there is no future in the past. Alot of people don't believe in therapy, but trust me it can help you leave the past behind you and prepare the two of you for a great future....Remember you can always change the future but you can never change the past...... I would hold off on marriage for a couple of more months just to be sure all the ducks are in a row for both of you....Good luck! Link to post Share on other sites
destination_unknown Posted March 29, 2006 Share Posted March 29, 2006 WIMLG, i read through all your threads, its really nice that things are going great for your second chance, and i hope it continues that way! i would say, ixnae on the marriage, she is still only 22 right? imo, way to young to get married. just enjoy each other for a while longer ... Link to post Share on other sites
CaliGuy Posted March 29, 2006 Share Posted March 29, 2006 Good story man. Sounds like you followed pretty much the same ideas in my guide. I am glad it's working out for you. Take it slow Link to post Share on other sites
Author whereismylifegoing Posted April 3, 2006 Author Share Posted April 3, 2006 Thanks people! i just things work out for everybody else too...... just hang in there Link to post Share on other sites
KittenMoon Posted April 3, 2006 Share Posted April 3, 2006 I saw you post in this thread and I automatically assumed the worst- like that you had broken up again! Isn't that awful?! It's a big relief to see that's not the case. It's nice to see one ray of sunshine on an otherwise cloudy day. Best wishes for the future- keep us updated. Link to post Share on other sites
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