FoolishDriver Posted March 28, 2006 Share Posted March 28, 2006 My boyfriend "disappeared" for Christmas, New Year's, my birthday, Valentine's day. Gave me the cold shoulder when I started asking him to do more things for me, drive to see me, stuff like that. I was devestated when he stopped contacting me as if I no longer mattered after all the time we had been together. I got myself into trouble by meeting a stranger in a bar and have been going through a lot of heartache over him. Late last night he called me. I have so many reasons to be angry at him about, but he threw everything at me. He was saying why I hadn't called him all this time to see how he was doing! The nerve of him. And when I would speak up, he'd gte mad and say don't get so defensive to me. He switched everything around so I was the wrong one, when I suspected he was with someone else the past couple of months when he suddently became MIA and I was left with a broken heart. He wants to see me tonight and I said ok. I used to be so in love with him tha tI would do anything. To my surprise, I actually don't even want to see him because I have so much anger in my heart. If he had apologized or seen things the way they really happened where he screwed me over, I would still have the feelings for him. I haven't been able to stop thinking of him. But the way he hurt me by forgetting about me for the past two months and not responding to my emails or calling, then calling me last night playing a game where he acts dumb about it and blames ME, I feel so angry and hurt and taken for a fool. Am I supposed to go over to his house tonight and act like everything is ok and grateful he has decided to take me back? I am so upset how and feel sad all over again. Please help me. I won't be at the computer almost the rest of the day until I am to go to his house straight from work but maybe I can get access to a computer to read any responses because I don't know if I'm doing the right thing to run back to him now that he has suddenly thought of me again and has not brought any closure to why he would ignore me for no reason all that time after we were together for a long time. Link to post Share on other sites
chocolate_boy Posted March 28, 2006 Share Posted March 28, 2006 I personally don't know why you're going to his house, he sounds like he's either a very confused or selfish person. How can anyone just vanish from their partners life? I think you'd sleep better at night without that worry in your life. Link to post Share on other sites
Bellona Posted March 28, 2006 Share Posted March 28, 2006 Honey, don't go. Been there, done that. At first I thought I wouldn't make it on my own. Then it hit me: yes, I'm hurting a lot, but it's a different kind of hurt from the up-all-night, anxious hurting that accompanies a relationship in which you don't know where you stand. You are not his priority. You deserve better. Don't let him get one over on you. You see through the lies and know that he is wrong. He's only trying to absolve himself of his own guilt. Link to post Share on other sites
luvtoto Posted March 29, 2006 Share Posted March 29, 2006 My boyfriend "disappeared"... Gave me the cold shoulder... I no longer mattered after all the time we had been together... I have so many reasons to be angry at him.... when I would speak up, he'd get mad... He switched everything around so I was the wrong one... To my surprise, I actually don't even want to see him... I have so much anger in my heart... If he had apologized I would still have the feelings for him... the way he hurt me by forgetting about me... he acts dumb about it and blames ME... I feel so angry and hurt and taken for a fool.... Foolish, he sounds like a real heal. Don't waste your time, hon. Please, follow your instincts which is the bolded area above... Link to post Share on other sites
Author FoolishDriver Posted March 31, 2006 Author Share Posted March 31, 2006 I personally don't know why you're going to his house, he sounds like he's either a very confused or selfish person. How can anyone just vanish from their partners life? I think you'd sleep better at night without that worry in your life. Chocolate Boy I read your response before being away from the computer and it confirmed my instinct to not see him. I didn't know how I was going to say no to him. He called to ask when I would be coming by. I said I would not be able to because I had to make a drive in the other direction to pick up an appliance and it would be too tiresome for me to get back to him. He looked up a local store near his home (it was for Home Depot) and gave me their phone number, address and directions so I could go to that one. I felt trapped and gave in, with a sinking feeling in my stomach. Instead of him apologizing, it was why did I stop contact and he was literally ACTING (as in lying) that he was the upset party. I was so messed up and hurt that he dropped me with no explanation, and here I was asking him to forgive me. He wa acting cool and distant one moment, then if I deserved it would warm up. I stayed the night (no sex). I think he sensed I was upset inside. He tried to make it up by asking me to stay the next day. He didn't go to work and I missed work to spend the day with him. I spent the night again and gave in to having sex even though I was still feeling hurt and disrespected and walked on. Here I am the following night. He hasn't called and for all I know he could be with another woman who I sensed he may have disappeared for. I have this 6th sense that there is another girl in the picture and I feel like I placed myself in a situation to get hurt all over again. How stupid am I? Link to post Share on other sites
Author FoolishDriver Posted March 31, 2006 Author Share Posted March 31, 2006 Foolish, he sounds like a real heal. Don't waste your time, hon. Please, follow your instincts which is the bolded area above... I wish I had done so. Why am I so stupid when it comes to relationships? I feel all hurt all over again:( Link to post Share on other sites
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