I'm Lonely

[Ms.vv]

I have been living with my boyfriend for 3 years now and everthing is great between us, the only problem is i am finding myself feeling really lonley, for 7 months of the year he works away in Europe he does come home every other weekend and whenever else he can, and even though things are really great beteen us and i wouldnt ever cheat on him i find myself drawn to one of my friends and i know he likes me too the problem is, he is married - he has asked for some 'no strings' fun (things between him and his wife are no good at the moment) but i just couldnt do that to my boyf. no matter how lonley i'm feeling. How do let my friend down without loosing him?

[johan]

First of all, you have to admit that this friend really isn't a friend. If there was no physical/emotional interest in having more, you wouldn't be have any closeness at all. So you won't be letting down a true friend. You'll just be letting a guy with whom you can't have a relationship know that for sure. If you mean it and if he believes it, the "friendship" you have with him will dissolve.

[MadDog]

Johan is right. Your "friend" is an ass. Stop wasting your time with him.

 

MD

[AFriend]

Jeez, if that is what people now a days are calling friend, then im going to stop makin' friends! Seriously, what kind of friend asks of something like that? My advice to you is just tell him straight out that you would never cheat on your boyfriend. And because your a friend, you can tell HIM to go to marriage counseling if he is having problems with his wife instead of going around cheating on her. Just my 2 cents.

[Curmudgeon]

He obviously lacks character and integrity. That doesn't sound like someone I'd want as a friend.

[Cheamps]

I agree, he doesn't sound like a great friend. If you're really torn up about it though, why don't you talk to your boyfriend? Obviously don't do this if you think it would cause huge problems, but it sounds like things are going well between you, and my guess is he's been tempted in the past 3 years too. Ask him for advice on how to get this "friend" off your back. That is, if you think he could answer objectively.

[Mary3]

I really have a thing against married men who want to *sleep around and have a little innocent fun.* He is not your friend . He just wants in your pants.

[aleatoryd]

Well unless you want to wrap yourself up in gift paper like a christmas present don't be a turkey! "No strings fun" No true friend would say that to you. This guy obviously doesn't respect his marriage vows and he won't respect you. On top of that you will lose your boyfriend, probably be found out and drawn into a bitter dispute, tarnished and called abusive names by wveryone who knows you.

 

Really stop entertaining those thoughts no good will come of them. Tell your so called friend to back away. Explain to him that you think he needs to work on his marriage. To him you are someone with an emotional need (having your b/f being so far away) and he wants to take advantage of you. If nothing else think about his poor wife.

 

I think Cheamps has a point. Asking your b/f for advice shows you trust and repect him and might add some spice to the relationship because he won't like the idea of other guys hitting on you but he will like the fact that you are desired by other men and that you tell him the truth.

 

Consider ditching the "friend" he doesn't respect you and he doesn't respect your relationship. People like that who have messed up their own relationship like nothing better than messing up other people.