HE'S A VIRGIN

[roxxy]

Um, My boyfreind is a virgin and we both would like to have sex with each other. I'm experienced and I don't want to be his "first" because it's a really special thing for him and I don't want to be "not good enough" I want his first time to be special like he wants it, but I don't know if I'm good enough to be his first time, I don't mean sexually good enough But as a person. See- he grew up nice and perfect and kind and I grew up dysfunctional. I feel like he deserves somebody better to lose his virginity to. We both really like each other even have talked about getting married, I just don't want to feel guilty like, he could've done better and he ended up with me. What do I do? and am I crazy for having these thoughts?? I really like him and don't want him to regret it if we do have sex. what do I do???? Please help me

[Katja]

Hi Roxie,

 

Maybe it would be better for him if you do have the experience (less awkward). Don't think badly of yourself because you had a dysfunctional past. Today is a new day! Treat him well, and focus on being a good and faithful person. You are as worthwhile as you are in this very moment -- not because of what happened in the past.

 

Take care,

 

Katja

Um, My boyfreind is a virgin and we both would like to have sex with each other. I'm experienced and I don't want to be his "first" because it's a really special thing for him and I don't want to be "not good enough" I want his first time to be special like he wants it, but I don't know if I'm good enough to be his first time, I don't mean sexually good enough But as a person. See- he grew up nice and perfect and kind and I grew up dysfunctional. I feel like he deserves somebody better to lose his virginity to. We both really like each other even have talked about getting married, I just don't want to feel guilty like, he could've done better and he ended up with me. What do I do? and am I crazy for having these thoughts?? I really like him and don't want him to regret it if we do have sex. what do I do???? Please help me

[Asrael]

Talk to him about it. Let him know exactly how you feel and that it's not because you don't love him, but that you're concerned for him. But if he really loves you, this is his decision, you know? I mean, it doesn't sound like you going to have sex with him then leave him; that would really hurt him. Instead, it sounds like the two of you are planning to stay together for at least a while so there's no real problem.

 

The past is the past and you can't let it haunt you forever. This guy really cares about you; so much that he wants to share a very special experience with YOU. This obviously shows that he thinks you're "worthy" and that this is something he wants to do with you.

 

Just talk to him about it so you both know exactly how you feel about the whole situation.

 

~Asrael