Elle Posted September 26, 2001 Share Posted September 26, 2001 Do u think it's possible to love 2 guys at once? I've been together with my bf for 5 yrs. I love him a lot and i can't imagine life without him. I am so comfortable with him. He knows me inside out and vice versa. But there's this other guy who is so sweet. He treats me so well, he looks after me and is very caring. I have more fun with this guy and i think abt him everyday. We've been intimate for 2 months the dilema that i am facing is : should i risk having a new r/ship with a guy that i really like but have no idea how things will turn out, or should i stick to my bf with whom i know wat the future holds? with my bf, i have the security of knowing that he loves me and is willing to spend the rest of his life with me, but since we've been together for so long, there's no romantic and no excitment. But with the other guy, i enjoy his company and i have more fun with him. so, is it wise to risk security for a new experience with aanother guy??? please help... Link to post Share on other sites
Daisy Posted September 26, 2001 Share Posted September 26, 2001 Do people in this day and age have NO clue what morals are? I mean come on. You ARE having a relationship with this new guy, whether you want to believe it or not. For cripes sake, look past your own nose for one second and realize that everything is not all about YOU. The world does not revolve around you. So stop acting like it does. A decent person would at least dump their boyfriend/girlfriend before exploring a relationship with another person. But then again, I guess you weren't really thinking about him, were you? All that you care about is yourself. Your boyfriend does not deserve someone like you. Dump him NOW. You have the nerve to lead him on, make him believe that you really love him ... YET YOUR SLEEPING WITH ANOTHER MAN. If that's not selfish, then I don't know what is. How can you even ASK if it's possible to love 2 men at the same time? You don't even know what love is. If you loved your boyfriend, you wouldn't even be thinking about another man, let alone sleeping with one. Grow up. Link to post Share on other sites
Tony T Posted September 26, 2001 Share Posted September 26, 2001 YOU ASK: "the dilema that i am facing is : should i risk having a new r/ship with a guy that i really like but have no idea how things will turn out, or should i stick to my bf with whom i know wat the future holds?" I hate to be the one to tell you this but you never know how anything is going to turn out...NEVER. In the U.S., for example, more than half of all people "who know what the future holds" get divorced. A good example is right now. You are cheating on your boyfriend. If you were married, you would be cheating on your husband. The situation would blow up in your face and you would likely be divorced. The basic requirements of a great marriage is caring, committment and communication. You lack committment in your current relationship or you wouldn't be asking this question. You're obviously not ready to settle down with anyone currently. I'd say, to stay honest, take the normal risk...break up with your current guy and date the new one along with any others you may want to consider. At some point in time...and don't rush things...you will meet someone about which you will have no questions and have no desire to cheat on. Then you will be ready for marriage...but not until. So do yourself a favor. Free yourself up and don't look for any guarantees. There are none in love. No matter how comfortable you feel, things can fall apart. As a matter of fact, I think the more confortable you feel (such as your boyfriend feels now) the more likely things are to blow up...as your current situation clearly illustrates. When we get too comfortable, we become complacent, take our partner for granted, become bored, and stop doing those special things that brought you together initially. Date your new guy and see if he is the one. If you meet others you are attracted to and want to be with, keep on going. When you are absolutely ready and you have no doubts, you won't come to this forum for advice. If I was your current boyfriend and I knew you had been screwing a really sweet, nice guy for two months, I'd drop you like a hot potato. Link to post Share on other sites
Tony T Posted September 26, 2001 Share Posted September 26, 2001 If I'd seen your post before I had finished mine, I wouldn't have bothered. You said it very well!!! Link to post Share on other sites
Daisy Posted September 26, 2001 Share Posted September 26, 2001 Thanks Tony. I guess I had to vent a little because it just irks me beyond belief that people actually think this is okay. And then they go even further and say that they actually love the person they are cheating on ... I feel like shaking these people silly. Link to post Share on other sites
BeenThere Posted September 27, 2001 Share Posted September 27, 2001 "...don't look for any guarantees. There are none in love. No matter how comfortable you feel, things can fall apart. As a matter of fact, I think the more confortable you feel (such as your boyfriend feels now) the more likely things are to blow up...as your current situation clearly illustrates. When we get too comfortable, we become complacent, take our partner for granted, become bored, and stop doing those special things that brought you together initially." BRAVO TONY! This one should be tatooed on the ass of *anyone* considering a relationship. So true! Link to post Share on other sites
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