mystified Posted April 13, 2006 Share Posted April 13, 2006 I am trying to breathe deep so I dont have a all out serious meltdown...... Tell me something.....especially men.. Your GF is upset, feeling sad, confused, (maybe over something you did) she tells you that her heart is breaking, she feels sick in her heart, she is crying on and off What do you do? Link to post Share on other sites
Author mystified Posted April 13, 2006 Author Share Posted April 13, 2006 Do you maybe comfort her? Give her a hug? Dismiss her and her feelings? Ignore her? Ask her whats wrong? Tell her to stop fighting with you? Tell her that you are going to go out with your friends? When your GF wants to talk to you, do you: Ask her whats up? ignore her, watch TV, talk on the phone? Tell her you are too tired, too hungry? Encourage her to talk to you? Make fun of her? Tell her that she is always fighting with you? Tell her that you are busy? If your GF did something in the past (in the very beginning of the relationship) that made you mad and suspicious of what she did, but you since moved on from there, do you: Bring it up every time she brings up something that she feels uncomfortable with? Tell her that you are going to do the same thing she did? Feel entitled to now do whatever you want? Accept her apology then, but when the subject of "immoral women" come up, you cant help but stick that snide remark of what she did as part of a immoral womans behaviour, though not coming right out and saying "like you did" When she is doubting you about something you have done, do you come back with bringing up the fact that you never did xyz? If you were belittling and berating your woman, and then ask her a question, and she doesnt respond for fear she will either flip out and say something hurtful, or because she cant, her throat is clogged with tears (obvious because there are tears running down her cheeks) so she just doesnt answer you, and when she can talk again, she asks you a question, do you: Ignore her for 5 minutes? for 10 minutes? and then ask her how it feels? Link to post Share on other sites
Author mystified Posted April 13, 2006 Author Share Posted April 13, 2006 One more thing...(sorry) BF works independently within company, has alot of free time on his hands...every time you call, does he: tell you that he is busy and hangs up? Tell you that the boss is right there, and he will call you later (yet doesnt)? Tell you his reception is no good? Flat out pretend he cant hear you? Repeating "hello" hello" loudly every time you try to talk with him until you get frustrated and hang up? Tell you that the new policy is that soon the cell phones are going to be banned? Tell you that someone is going to tell on him for talking on the phone? Some interesting facts: You worked with him in the past, so you know EXACTLY how the cell phone system works (very lieniant) AND even if they did change the cell phone rule, his free time is so enormous, that he could very well find the time to call you AND Later on, upon going through his cell phone records, you see that he had time to make PLENTY of 15 minute converstations to many people throughout the day, on many many days, sometimes at the exact moment that you placed a call into him when he claimed he couldnt talk? WHAT DOES ONE CALL THIS TYPE OF MAN? Link to post Share on other sites
IrishCarBomb Posted April 13, 2006 Share Posted April 13, 2006 WHAT DOES ONE CALL THIS TYPE OF MAN? Heterosexual. Link to post Share on other sites
Author mystified Posted April 13, 2006 Author Share Posted April 13, 2006 Heterosexual. so thats it?? his behaviour with me is normal then? Link to post Share on other sites
blind_otter Posted April 13, 2006 Share Posted April 13, 2006 Have you tried telling him what you need from him when you get like that? Link to post Share on other sites
Author mystified Posted April 13, 2006 Author Share Posted April 13, 2006 Yes, I have tried to explain things to him, and he *automatically* dismisses me......I cant even get a word in first sometimes before he blows up on me, telling me that he doesnt want to fight with me, and that if I continue or say another word, he is out the door.......I am left scratching my head like, WTF???? It is becoming clearer to me that he equates my sadness and trying to express it as picking a fight with him..... then he starts speaking illogically.....comparing apples to oranges, not even understanding what I was saying in the first place...... Then tells me that every day we fight.... I am like "we do"????? Apparently he is equating any type of conversation with him at all as "fighting"????? um, dont get it?! Link to post Share on other sites
mental_traveller Posted April 14, 2006 Share Posted April 14, 2006 Depends. If I don't know why then I'd ask her what's up. If I know why and it was legit, I'd try to comfort her. If I know why and think it's a load of crap, I'd probably start thinking whether this relationship is worth all the drama. Link to post Share on other sites
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