Never Posted April 16, 2006 Share Posted April 16, 2006 I know it seems custom for teens to feel like their parents are the worst, the 'evil', and the most unfair people they know. I'm 15, and I don't feel this way for the most part, I just feel as though I can't please them. I'm not a bad kid. I don't drink, I don't smoke, I don't do drugs, I don't lie to my parents, I don't have sex; I have a healthy life, I had a healthy relationship with my exgirlfriend, I get good grades, etc. Getting that out of the way, usually when my parents ask me of something, I do it. Empty the dishwasher - done, set the table - done, clean your room - for the most part, done, etc. I don't recieve an allowance, and I don't get any special praise for doing them - and I don't expect any. There are all of these opportunities I could take but don't because my parents wouldn't approve - alcohol, sex, being out late with friends, etc. Moreso, when I want something, I try to raise the money myself, as I don't get an allowance or anything - which usually involves me doing work for neighbors, babysitting, or selling things of mine. Don't get me wrong, my parents don't deprive me of things I need or anything, but recently I've been wanting to get an MP3 player. From work and such I have about 70$ right now, and the MP3 player I want is 230$. Since it would take a while to reach my goal and the deal wont last for long (It goes back up to 320$ soon), I was hoping my parents could help me out. Now when I was younger, I wasn't always this way. I would ask for things constantly. At around 13, I wanted a lot of things that other kids had. Videogames, a skateboard, etc. I would ask and usually I wouldn't get what I asked for. But now I came up with an idea. My birthday is about a month away, so I asked my parents if I could pitch in and get this for my birthday. Usually for birthdays, I get about 100$ worth from my parents. So I asked if maybe I could get it and only have 60$ left over to owe them (230$-170$=60$) And before my parents even cared about anything else I had to say, they said no. My mom is a person who always just wants to say whatever she feels like and thinks her opinion is correct. If I was to try to explain to her anything, she'll constantly tell me the same thing over and over. So this time, she doesn't even give me a chance and shuts me down. "David, you always try to wheel-and-deal, stop asking. Stop asking. Stop asking" I just feel so offended, I honestly haven't asked for things for a long time. I've tried my hardest to please them, and when I want something they can't even make a compromise. I told them if they would do this for me, I wouldn't even open it until my birthday, I just don't want to have to save up 100$ more to buy it when I have a great opportunity right now. Is there anything I can do? I mean not to get the MP3 player, but to make things better? Honestly I've tried not asking for things and trying to please them, but it doesn't work. It's also extremely hard because I get the bottom end of the stick. I have an older brother, and he has a lot of opportunities I don't. My parents pay for him to go to Iowa with his friend, to go to a convention in San Jose, to go to Italy, etc. I don't. Maybe it's wrong to think I deserve something for not getting all of these chances and attention, but when I do ask for this one thing I get shut down. Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted April 17, 2006 Share Posted April 17, 2006 I think you need to talk to your parents. Tell them exactly what you posted here about, and let them know HOW they make you feel. I just feel as though I can't please them. Stop trying to please them, or look for their approval. Seems your parents cannot be pleased. So, be happy for yourself! YOUR opinion counts more than anybody's as it's your life, your feelings. I wish that your parents would ease up and see you for who you are. Problem is kiddo, that ALL folks are like this...And it doesn't change when you get older. I'm 35 years old and my mom is the same. You have to change your ways of thinking that suit you best. Let go of little things that piss you off about your parents...They won't change, ever. Only you can change how you deal/react with them. Link to post Share on other sites
Skeered Posted April 17, 2006 Share Posted April 17, 2006 I agree with the other poster in that you should talk to them...or heck just print out what you wrote and ask that you can all sit and they can read it. Best thing is to open a line of communication with them. You sound like a smart kid who's thinking things through and that's awesome, even if your parents don't seem as they are noticing they probably are. As far as your brother getting different opportunities, well unfortunately with multiple kids in a family that will happen, parents think they are treating each child the same when in essence that's almost impossible because no child is the same. Keep your chin up and keep earnin that money, you'll get your MP3 player whether they help you or not and either way you will be happy you got it. Just think of this as a life lesson in responsibility. Not saying you need that but life is full of these little lessons for the rest of your days. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Never Posted April 17, 2006 Author Share Posted April 17, 2006 Thank you for both of your replies; Since we talked about it, today I woke up and my dad told me we were going to go open up an account for me; so I could do my own transactions and such (I had asked him if I could sell some things on ebay to raise money). I was really excited; we got to the bank and the man asked how much we'd like to put on; so I pull out my 50$ I wanted to put on and my dad says he'll put a hundred. So I don't know why, but things changed quickely; he said I could use the 100$ but I still need to raise the 60$ extra through working and such. This way, he says, he wont have to forward me my birthday money so I can use that later. I don't know why things changed, but he's being really nice about it today. Link to post Share on other sites
Skeered Posted April 17, 2006 Share Posted April 17, 2006 Well that is wonderful news...sometimes it just takes parents some "sleep on it" time to figure things out. If you had already mentioned the idea to them maybe your mom brought it up to your dad and they came to the conclusion that it was a great idea and that you were showing some real maturity. No need to think about what the change in the wind was just realize that they did hear you. It's great that your parents also felt that they didn't want to use your b-day money on this purchase...but to let you have that for something else at a later date. Congrats...and keep a line of communication open with your folks, even though you may not understand their reasoning at times, just remember they got where they are by things that they learned in the younger years too... Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Posted May 7, 2006 Share Posted May 7, 2006 your parents seem horrible just like my parents. My parents are seriosly really selfish. http://www.loveshack.org/forums/images/icons/icon4.gif Exclamation Link to post Share on other sites
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