Boyfriend cut all sexual contact!

[confused]

My boyfriend and i have been together for a year and we are serious. I love him very much and being physical with him (no intercourse though)is the way i express my deep love for him. Today he told me he had a weird experience and he prayed to God and somehow he felt that he shouldn't be touching me. He is baptist and we decided to remain virgins until marriage but we engage in other sexual activities.

 

Now he wants to stop everything sexual. I understand and i'm willing to stop but i'm very confused the whole thing threw me off. I don't know how to cope,i mean here i was giving my love and sharing my body with him and now i feel like i'm not going to share that until 5 yrs from now when we marry.

 

He's 27 and i'm 23 both virgins. please tell me what can i do to cope i'm very confused,at the same time i feel like i was doing something wrong and that i'm dirty. what do you think about this?

[Tony T]

You weren't doing anything wrong at all. Millions of unmarried couples engage in intercourse daily around the planet and most are respected people in their societies and well regarded in their churches.

 

I hardly think that having sex or petting heavily could be all that serious when people are out there crashing planes into populated skyscrapers in the name of their own God, relatively speaking.

 

Your biggest problem is going to be holding out on sexual activity of any kind for three to five years before you get married. I think this may be very difficult for you. You need to find out why your boyfriend got this degree of religion all of a sudden.

 

I can't imagine a deity who provided man and woman with sexual hormones and equipment would frown on them making some use of those prior to marriage. Of course, I'm not the sharpest knife in the drawer. But the God who I believe in does not play cruel jokes like that on his creations.

 

You were asking what you could do to cope. Well, that all depends on your own personal beliefs. If masturbation is against your religion, I suppose you could take some sort of drug prescribed by your doctor to supress your sexual desires. I think that would be absurd, however.

 

If I were you, I would go seek another more accepting line of religious thought. And I would have tons of fun while I was young and use the precious gifts of hormones and equipment that God most willingly and lovingly gave me.

[Julia]

You weren't doing anything wrong at all. Millions of unmarried couples engage in intercourse daily around the planet and most are respected people in their societies and well regarded in their churches. I hardly think that having sex or petting heavily could be all that serious when people are out there crashing planes into populated skyscrapers in the name of their own God, relatively speaking.

 

Your biggest problem is going to be holding out on sexual activity of any kind for three to five years before you get married. I think this may be very difficult for you. You need to find out why your boyfriend got this degree of religion all of a sudden. I can't imagine a deity who provided man and woman with sexual hormones and equipment would frown on them making some use of those prior to marriage. Of course, I'm not the sharpest knife in the drawer. But the God who I believe in does not play cruel jokes like that on his creations.

 

You were asking what you could do to cope. Well, that all depends on your own personal beliefs. If masturbation is against your religion, I suppose you could take some sort of drug prescribed by your doctor to supress your sexual desires. I think that would be absurd, however. If I were you, I would go seek another more accepting line of religious thought. And I would have tons of fun while I was young and use the precious gifts of hormones and equipment that God most willingly and lovingly gave me.