serial muse Posted April 17, 2006 Share Posted April 17, 2006 Hi all. I saw a thread about this in the OW forum, and I thought I'd throw out the question over here, too. So. I'm happily divorced, and I still have my engagement ring. It's a pretty ring, but you know - it's just hanging around, now. For a while I hung onto it because I wasn't ready to take that cold, pragmatic, final step. Then, I forgot about it. Now I'm ready to dispose of it somehow (though I'm not in a rush), but I'm not sure how to do it. I'm just wondering if anyone has any suggestions. I could just sell the whole thing I guess (I could use the money), or I could take out the diamonds (a center stone and then several tiny ones around it) and have them all reset into a necklace or something. I kind of like that second option, because !oooooh sparkly!, but I don't know how to go about it, or how much that might cost me. Ideas??? (By the way, I have the wedding ring, too, but it was my grandmother's, so it's not going anywhere. It's a lovely little engraved platinum ring from the 1920s. My gmother and gfather had a long happy marriage, so I refuse to believe it's cursed. ) Link to post Share on other sites
a4a Posted April 17, 2006 Share Posted April 17, 2006 donate it to a charity! You will get a nice tax write off and you will be helping a cause you believe in. Link to post Share on other sites
2sunny Posted April 17, 2006 Share Posted April 17, 2006 Do you have a close relative that would appreciate a gift? Even if it was just the stone to be used later? My sister's inlaws have numerous loose diamonds from generations ago and on special occasions (especially engagements - not only with their kids but their grandkids) they dream up different "gifts" for their sons to give their wives.... just a thought... hang on to it, you just never know when someone you love may appreciate it.... Link to post Share on other sites
Skeered Posted April 17, 2006 Share Posted April 17, 2006 I too am post divorce now and have my wedding set...but I am going to take it back to the dealer I purchased it from (yes I bought my own wedding and engagment ring oh yeah and his wedding band, heck for that matter I paid for the whole wedding and divorce too...lol) the dealer will buy my set back by givin me another piece of jewlery for a better price...so basically my set cost me $1300 and they will give me a $600 credit towards something else, so I could trade up to a better ring if I wanted. As far as takin the stones out and setting them in something else, I thought of doin that too but you will forever remember where those stones came from, I didn't want that. But if you go to a jewler they can help you make a choice on what to make out of it if you did that. I have my grandmother's diamonds in a beautiful heart shaped pendant. You can always pawn it but you won't get nearly what it's worth as most pawn shops go off the weight of the ring not actual value of the stones. Link to post Share on other sites
Touche Posted April 17, 2006 Share Posted April 17, 2006 I sometimes wear my engagement ring from my first marriage as a cocktail ring on my right hand. It holds absolutely no sentimental value to me whatsoever. It's just an object to me now...albeit a pretty one. But that's just me. Link to post Share on other sites
a4a Posted April 17, 2006 Share Posted April 17, 2006 I sometimes wear my engagement ring from my first marriage as a cocktail ring on my right hand. It holds absolutely no sentimental value to me whatsoever. It's just an object to me now...albeit a pretty one. But that's just me. You ring hoarder!!! JK! Link to post Share on other sites
Author serial muse Posted April 17, 2006 Author Share Posted April 17, 2006 I sometimes wear my engagement ring from my first marriage as a cocktail ring on my right hand. It holds absolutely no sentimental value to me whatsoever. It's just an object to me now...albeit a pretty one. But that's just me. I actually considered this. I mean, I do like the ring, he did a nice job picking it out. Gotta give him that. And it's not like I'm getting rid of any other jewelry he's given me (well...except for a bracelet he bought me for our last Xmas together at the same time and from the same place that he bought a Xmas gift for his mistress. The idea of him picking out our gifts at the same time used to make me nauseous; now I just roll my eyes at the nerve of the guy. What a maroon. So yeah, I gave that thing away.) But...though I kind of like this idea in theory, I know in fact that I'd feel awkward wearing it. Overall, I'd prefer something more final. Great suggestions, guys - keep 'em coming! I'm still deliberating. Link to post Share on other sites
Art_Critic Posted April 17, 2006 Share Posted April 17, 2006 I took a 16 lb sledge hammer and smashed mine flat..the little diamond chips flew across the room.. I then gave my flattened ring back to my ex..( or then wife that I was divorcing) i wanted her to know that it wasn't going back on my finger Link to post Share on other sites
b52srock Posted April 17, 2006 Share Posted April 17, 2006 My ex pretty much knew not to ask for the rings back, and actually surrendered his to me just before things were final. See, I'd bought them! Yep, bought my own wedding rings. Will NEVER do that again! Looking back on it, it feels like that was kind of a precursor to how things were going to end up, you know? One thing he did do, though, that really ticked me off.... His mother, over the years, had given me two rings that were family heirlooms. The understanding was that I was to wear them in good health until the children were old enough to get married themselves or whatever (one girl, one boy), and at that time, they would be passed on to them as family pieces. A-hole tells his attorney that I have these rings (platinum, exquisite diamonds, unGodly expensive, Tiffany) and as such, should get less money in the settlement because of them! Like I'm going to go out and pawn them? Like hell! Unlike him, I keep my promises, and the children will get the rings when the time comes. Actually, I used to love wearing them because they are beautiful, but since that came up I haven't had them on. Put them in the safe deposit box and there they'll stay until the time is right. Maybe I should have given them back...but honestly? I think he had every intention of pawning them himself and using the money to fix up the little love nest for the wench. I flat told my attorney he couldn't have them back, told him the circumstances behind the gift from his mother, and even called his mother to let her know what he was up to. She told me if I gave them back to him that she'd make sure they were returned to me to give to the kids! He would have been screwed anyway! Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Posted May 4, 2006 Share Posted May 4, 2006 My ex pretty much knew not to ask for the rings back, and actually surrendered his to me just before things were final. See, I'd bought them! Yep, bought my own wedding rings. Will NEVER do that again! Looking back on it, it feels like that was kind of a precursor to how things were going to end up, you know? One thing he did do, though, that really ticked me off.... His mother, over the years, had given me two rings that were family heirlooms. The understanding was that I was to wear them in good health until the children were old enough to get married themselves or whatever (one girl, one boy), and at that time, they would be passed on to them as family pieces. A-hole tells his attorney that I have these rings (platinum, exquisite diamonds, unGodly expensive, Tiffany) and as such, should get less money in the settlement because of them! Like I'm going to go out and pawn them? Like hell! Unlike him, I keep my promises, and the children will get the rings when the time comes. Actually, I used to love wearing them because they are beautiful, but since that came up I haven't had them on. Put them in the safe deposit box and there they'll stay until the time is right. Maybe I should have given them back...but honestly? I think he had every intention of pawning them himself and using the money to fix up the little love nest for the wench. I flat told my attorney he couldn't have them back, told him the circumstances behind the gift from his mother, and even called his mother to let her know what he was up to. She told me if I gave them back to him that she'd make sure they were returned to me to give to the kids! He would have been screwed anyway! When my wife and I split, I wasn't worried about the engagement and wedding rings (upset the next time I saw her she wasn't wearing them though) but I wanted the eternity ring. I wanted to take a pair or pliers to it with her watching and then throw it away the way she had thrown away me. Link to post Share on other sites
Scott S Posted May 8, 2006 Share Posted May 8, 2006 So. I'm happily divorced, and I still have my engagement ring. It's a pretty ring, but you know - it's just hanging around, now. For a while I hung onto it because I wasn't ready to take that cold, pragmatic, final step. Then, I forgot about it. Now I'm ready to dispose of it somehow (though I'm not in a rush), but I'm not sure how to do it. Ideas??? Many jewelers & diamond merchants take them as a trade-up to a larger stone. You may get more for it than from a pawnbroker or by attempting to sell it outright. ______________________________________________ If a man eats a pound of pasta & a pound of antipasto, do they cancel each other out, leaving the man still hungry? Link to post Share on other sites
blind_otter Posted May 8, 2006 Share Posted May 8, 2006 Sell it. Anything else is a waste of energy. Link to post Share on other sites
luvtoto Posted May 8, 2006 Share Posted May 8, 2006 I took a 16 lb sledge hammer and smashed mine flat..the little diamond chips flew across the room.. I then gave my flattened ring back to my ex..( or then wife that I was divorcing) i wanted her to know that it wasn't going back on my finger I did that, too. Hammer was used though, and it was only a $350 CZ. But it was a beautiful ring. Got lots of compliments on it. A week before that, I threw the sucker into an abandoned field across the street. He went and borrowed a metal detector and found it. We've managed to stay friends over the years, but never brought up the ring ever. I think he knew. Link to post Share on other sites
tinktronik Posted May 8, 2006 Share Posted May 8, 2006 I took a 16 lb sledge hammer and smashed mine flat..the little diamond chips flew across the room.. I then gave my flattened ring back to my ex..( or then wife that I was divorcing) i wanted her to know that it wasn't going back on my finger :lmao: I pawned mine ..................for diapers. Link to post Share on other sites
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