Staying together for the kids...

[Guest]

I understand exactly how you feel. It is much easier to stay together for many reasons, besides just for the kids.

 

I am still married for two reasons, financially it is easier and for the children. It is easier to give advice if you have never been in a situation like this. Looking through the window is easier than walking through the door. Life is very difficult and making the right choices are tough.

 

Everyone is taught to put the children first. Kids don't want parents to break up. When they do it causes other problems. Its just hard for people to give advice when they have really never been in the same situation.

 

I am in the same situation and I can't give any helpful advice except to say, I know what you are going through and its a tough road to travel on, its lonely and very depressing. But it is also hard to know if what you are doing is right or wrong. So I feel for you.....if you need an ear, I'm here to listen.

[1Gravity]

Thank you very much! Sometimes sympathetic ears are in short supply. I'd love to have your e-mail.

 

Thanks again,

 

1Gravity (gravity was taken)

 

I understand exactly how you feel. It is much easier to stay together for many reasons, besides just for the kids.

 

I am still married for two reasons, financially it is easier and for the children. It is easier to give advice if you have never been in a situation like this. Looking through the window is easier than walking through the door. Life is very difficult and making the right choices are tough.

 

Everyone is taught to put the children first. Kids don't want parents to break up. When they do it causes other problems. Its just hard for people to give advice when they have really never been in the same situation.

 

I am in the same situation and I can't give any helpful advice except to say, I know what you are going through and its a tough road to travel on, its lonely and very depressing. But it is also hard to know if what you are doing is right or wrong. So I feel for you.....if you need an ear, I'm here to listen.

[Chump64]

I can understand staying together for the kids (trust me, that was my main motivation after finding out that my husband had a 10 year affair). I think it depends, though, on the environment. If you are raising your kids in a home with a loveless marriage, think about the potential damage. I know that if, in my situation, we were not a loving and affectionate couple (and we always have been, despite the effed up situation), I would not be working to save this.

 

I am also a kid of divorce. I turned out great. I can't say the same for my siblings, though. I do think people can divorce and still 'do it right.' I would be careful not to give to much credence to all those experts who insist divorce = effed up kids. There are too many kids who have survived that situation, and who are just fine, as examples.