lovernotafighter Posted April 30, 2006 Share Posted April 30, 2006 Mean streak??Do tell! The problem is that I don't have any meanness in me at all. I can't even imagine doing anything that would hurt anybody - let alone my MM. My MM's wife can be mean, though. that's the thing though,I'm not mean or evil to people I care about and there is where the difference with his wife and me are. like hearing stories of her deliberately destroying his clothes and throwing things at him..calling up his sisters and cursing them out..I'd never do that. but I am a little more evil and mean in the other way (you sure you wanna hear this lol!) for instance, the woman who caused me 3000 dollars in damage to my car and then lied on the accident report of fault causing me to pay my deductible and having to 400 dollars for a rent a car..I went and put rocks in her hubcaps and threw baloney all over her car (this eats a paint off cars for some weird reason) ,put super glue in her locks. theres another time a woman who lived above my mother was breaking into her home and stealing stupid stuff..I replaced a bunch things I knew she was stealing..for instance...Nair in the shampoo bottle and vinegar and visine in the vodka...she moved out the next month..while wearing a bandanna. it's juvenile yes,but I have a evil streak when someone screws me over or mess's with someone I care about. My MM's W is nothing like me. She's old fasion in every sense, and she's only 7 years older than me! She's short, I'm tall. Her hair is short, mine is long. I still dress like a teen, she dresses like an old lady. I'm wild and she's a one kind of position girl in bed. Maybe that's why he wanted me in the first place. I don't know how she could have ever handled what he has to offer! now see my MM tells me his W will only do stationary position (he says because she worries about her weight) and also asks 'are you going to cum yet?" and acting like it's a chore... but in the same token he says he doesn't initiate sex with her..but she does..if she really felt that way would she be initiating sex with him? I kinda don't believe him here...but who knows. the less I know the better anyway. Link to post Share on other sites
stillhere Posted April 30, 2006 Share Posted April 30, 2006 He was always the one initiating sex, not her. She was too tired. Always too tired, and he's the one who works his a$$ off for 16 hours a day. He never bad mouths her though, and either do i. I actually envy her. Not only because she has the man i want, but because she is an amazing person. I even told him that if he were to leave her, i couldn't be what she is. Link to post Share on other sites
lovernotafighter Posted April 30, 2006 Share Posted April 30, 2006 He was always the one initiating sex, not her. She was too tired. Always too tired, and he's the one who works his a$$ off for 16 hours a day. He never bad mouths her though, and either do i. I actually envy her. Not only because she has the man i want, but because she is an amazing person. I even told him that if he were to leave her, i couldn't be what she is. I believe this is more like my MM's wife dispite what he may tell me. I told him once while he was turning the air blue about her that she must actually be a wonderful woman or you wouldn't stay..and I fail to believe that she isn't a great mother to his child. I won't bad mouth her ever..I don't know her and it would just make me seem bitter and jealous. I envy her to a point...to the point I realize he can be quite the crappy husband. Link to post Share on other sites
RealityCheck Posted April 30, 2006 Share Posted April 30, 2006 *laughing* I was ALWAYS too tired with my Ex H but that's because I wasn't interested to have him in that way. My MM emailed me a pic of his W. HO-LY!! Seriously, I was shocked! I'm blonde, brown eyes tall, slim and fit! His W has short brown hair, brown eyes, is tall and about 300 lbs!!! My MM said that after their child was born she totally let herself go and he completely lost his desire to be intimate with her. He says he has sex with her about every four weeks just to keep her suspision at bay and it makes him sick to even think of having sex with her. He said his mind is never present with her and that the act itself is pretty damn quick if ya all know what I'm talking about! On.....off... Ewwwwww As far as my MM. He's the complete physical package. Totally delicious to look at! Link to post Share on other sites
lovernotafighter Posted April 30, 2006 Share Posted April 30, 2006 hmm...my MM says he has sex with his W about once every two to three weeks..he also says to keep up the pretense everything is fine..now with men they have to be able to get a erection right? I don't buy my MM's story at all here...though I believe allot of what he says..this isn't one of 'em. I told him my husband is good looking and goes to the gym everyday..so he kinda wigged out over that. which to me they are both really fine..but my relationship with H is so poor and at times I'm so pissed off at him I have zero interest in sex with him. where as MM can say everything I want to hear and I have no time to get totally pissed at him..therefore he still can be my sexy little crush..and he is..6'2 185 very fit, blond with green eyes,always dressed sharp and shaves always..keeps his hair nice and neat...and beautiful teeth. his wife does have a beautiful smile that I did see from her pic. (oh yeah speaking of evil...I'm sitting here thinking of putting a spell on MM *shrugs*) Link to post Share on other sites
beachrosie Posted May 1, 2006 Share Posted May 1, 2006 Nothing alike...not even slightly. He is not with her anymore (thank God) and is on his road to recovery from being horribly abused. She is not a good person, never was, but there is still hope that one day she might be...well, maybe not. We don't look anything alike nor do we like anything remotely similar except for him. I'm not so sure she ever liked him though. What a mess. Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Posted May 2, 2006 Share Posted May 2, 2006 I really hope to god that I'm not like that. I wouldn't like myself very much if I were. If I were like her, I would take pleasure in slitting my own wrist. You have issues. This is another human being, not to mention you are fu^%ing her husband. You may not like her, but there is something there that he likes, or he wouldnt still be maried! You know, my H told his OW a lot of lies about me. He told me so. He also told me he said those things to get sympathy from his OW. I guess the OW is just as nieve as the wife! But, dont talk about slitting your wrists if you were her! Its completly disrespectful, ignornant, and shows your lack of maturity. Maybe your lack of compassion may be a fault on why you cant land your own signle man! Link to post Share on other sites
stillafool Posted May 9, 2006 Share Posted May 9, 2006 Ooh gee Guest, let's not get mean. Everyone is entitled to their own opinions here, aren't they? My MM's wife is short, olive skinned, conservative (like him) and a career woman. I am tall, fair, free-spririted and a housewife. I guess they do want something different in most cases. However, sometimes a person has a "type" they like and that's why the W and OW resemble each other. Link to post Share on other sites
zarathustra Posted May 9, 2006 Share Posted May 9, 2006 You have issues. This is another human being, not to mention you are fu^%ing her husband. You may not like her, but there is something there that he likes, or he wouldnt still be maried! You know, my H told his OW a lot of lies about me. He told me so. He also told me he said those things to get sympathy from his OW. I guess the OW is just as nieve as the wife! But, dont talk about slitting your wrists if you were her! Its completly disrespectful, ignornant, and shows your lack of maturity. Maybe your lack of compassion may be a fault on why you cant land your own signle man! Actually, you don't know me. I like who I am and would never want to be like her. If I was remotely like her, I would rather not be here on this earth. Just a preference. I have heard the way she speaks to my X MM. I do not communicate in that way to anyone, not even in hurt and anger. I know myself. If I need to be like her to keep my xMM, I would rather live without him. I would rather give him freedom to live his life as he pleases rather than telling him his thoughts are abnormal. I'd rather talk about issues than to preach to him about how things are supposed to be like he's some moron. I don't speak that way to anyone, not even an ex that cheated on me... so 'huney' I've been of both sides of the friken fence. My EX (focus on the X) MM could have lied about his W, but if he did, he wouldn't have left his M to be with me... which by the way he did. His final words to me when we decided to split is that he chooses his kids... Soooo, he crawled back to her because of the kids. You know the saying... if you've got lemons, try to make lemonade. Maybe there's some sugar left in the pantry. Does it hurt me, of course it does. Do I need to grieve and heal from this of course I do. Look, I can understand you may be in pain too, but I didn't say anything disrespectful to myself. I just indicated that I don't want to be anything like someone else. So if you are in pain and you need some group support, why don't you hang out in the infidelity forum like the rest of the BSs.... Unless you didn't notice, this is a support forum for OWs. Hey, if you want to start a cat fight, I'm game. I sharpen my claws daily with the s*** I have to deal with. So why don't you take a piss and look at your reflection in it? it isn't so pretty, is it? If your life with your life with your H was picture, f***ing perfect, he wouldn't have had to stray from the nest. If he admitted to lying to someone to get laid, then he's f***ing pathetic too. I'm sure you deserve him. Link to post Share on other sites
RealityCheck Posted May 9, 2006 Share Posted May 9, 2006 Guest..... WTF!!!! Actually, we OW's make MAD PASSIONATE LOVE to your H's, while your H's JUST F**K you!!! Dip it in, and get the h*ll off!!! *yeah he wants you alright!* Link to post Share on other sites
tinktronik Posted May 9, 2006 Share Posted May 9, 2006 Guest..... WTF!!!! Actually, we OW's make MAD PASSIONATE LOVE to your H's, while your H's JUST F**K you!!! Dip it in, and get the h*ll off!!! *yeah he wants you alright!*WTF is wrong with you?Why would you even say something like this ? Its drivel . I would suggest the anwser lies somewhere inbetween .The H is incapable of giving fully to either OW or W . Link to post Share on other sites
RealityCheck Posted May 9, 2006 Share Posted May 9, 2006 WTF is wrong with me!!! I'll tell you! If someone is going to dish it out in the Forum, they better be able to take it! Pissed off! That's WTF is wrong with me!! Link to post Share on other sites
tinktronik Posted May 9, 2006 Share Posted May 9, 2006 WTF is wrong with me!!! I'll tell you! If someone is going to dish it out in the Forum, they better be able to take it! Pissed off! That's WTF is wrong with me!!It was not being dished at you . The statement made was that in order to have the affair you can not consider what it would be like to be in the dark on the other side or you wouldnt have it in the first place .It is a lack of compassion!The wife if she knew how her husband felt would be compassionate at letting him leave or compassionate about his need to hold the attentions of more than one woman.The OW would be compassionate to the wife and never have the affair, and the H would not do what he's doing to either of the women out of compassion. Link to post Share on other sites
zarathustra Posted May 9, 2006 Share Posted May 9, 2006 It was not being dished at you . The statement made was that in order to have the affair you can not consider what it would be like to be in the dark on the other side or you wouldnt have it in the first place .It is a lack of compassion!The wife if she knew how her husband felt would be compassionate at letting him leave or compassionate about his need to hold the attentions of more than one woman.The OW would be compassionate to the wife and never have the affair, and the H would not do what he's doing to either of the women out of compassion. Um... the comment was dished at me about how my lack of compassion equates to my inability to land a single man. When she made that comment to me, she also made that comment to all the other OWs on this forum. She is not welcomed here. Maybe she should focus on making a happy home for her hubby so that he keeps his dick where it belongs instead of spreading her venom here. Thanks RC! Link to post Share on other sites
RealityCheck Posted May 9, 2006 Share Posted May 9, 2006 Tinktronik..... You know I get a little sensitive....because the reality is..... Don't shoot the messenger! I posted a response of what my EX-MM had said to me! Meaning some W's, H told me those exact words! Lovingly, I may add! So if I read something that gives the slightest jab towards the OW, I do become protective to their situation, because we have all been lead by the H's "Words". Link to post Share on other sites
RealityCheck Posted May 9, 2006 Share Posted May 9, 2006 Zara.... Anytime Dolly!! Grrrrrr....... Link to post Share on other sites
zarathustra Posted May 9, 2006 Share Posted May 9, 2006 Zara.... Anytime Dolly!! Grrrrrr....... and I thought my claws were sharp! :lmao: :lmao: Link to post Share on other sites
RealityCheck Posted May 9, 2006 Share Posted May 9, 2006 Zara...... Your claws are verrrrry sharp! Actually, I would also venture to say...... you are also, one of the sharpest knives in the drawer! *laughing* Link to post Share on other sites
zarathustra Posted May 9, 2006 Share Posted May 9, 2006 Zara...... Your claws are verrrrry sharp! Actually, I would also venture to say...... you are also, one of the sharpest knives in the drawer! *laughing* Aww!!!! thaaaaanks!!! I think that you are one of the sharpest tool in the shed! Like you said, if they are dishing it, then they should be able to take the heat too. I hate people who stink up our forum with their stinkin' dirty laundry. Link to post Share on other sites
rossm Posted May 9, 2006 Share Posted May 9, 2006 Another thread made me wonder.... Do the W and OW usually hold same characteristics - whether it be looks or personality traits? Even possibly that the OW REMINDS the MM of a younger or more open minded version of his wife from years ago? Just wondering how you all feel about this.... Well, here's a male perspective. OW/MW found me. She said that I was more attractive than her husband. I haven't seen him, so I can't verify. From what she has said about H, I have a completely opposite personality. OW and W are not very similar. Not in looks, or personalities. In many ways, they are opposites. Honestly, what attracted me to OW was that she was like a euphoric drug that provided me with exactly what I had been missing, and evidently craving, from W, namely satisfaction of my emotional and physical needs. And as most of you know, unfortunately, it is so easy to get hooked on that drug. And withdrawal hurts. OW and W each have pros and cons to their personalities, as do I. Truth be told, the OW is more physically attractive than W, but that didn't really matter. Link to post Share on other sites
RealityCheck Posted May 9, 2006 Share Posted May 9, 2006 Rossm..... Mmmmm..... Interesting! That's exactly what my exMM said to me about the complete opposite package. He also said that I fed his emotional and physical needs. So my question to you is, why do you stay married if your unfulfilled? I'm just curious, because I know what I was told by my exMM, my inquisitive mind would like to know your feelings.... Link to post Share on other sites
rossm Posted May 10, 2006 Share Posted May 10, 2006 Rossm..... Mmmmm..... Interesting! That's exactly what my exMM said to me about the complete opposite package. He also said that I fed his emotional and physical needs. So my question to you is, why do you stay married if your unfulfilled? I'm just curious, because I know what I was told by my exMM, my inquisitive mind would like to know your feelings.... Why stay married? Honestly, I did not know how bad it had really gotten. Things had slipped away so slowly that I didn't realize what had happened. Eventually, the limited emotional bond and lack of intimacy seemed normal to me. And, I enjoyed the companionship. Then the OW/MW who had a similar situation at home came along and found me. She provided me with the attention I consciously didn't know I needed, but unconsciously was craving. I was never looking for an A, but boy, I was vulnerable, and she got me hooked in way too easy. (I guess I can call her the EX-OW now, because I'm trying to go NC.) What it did was awaken feelings in me that had gone dormant. It made me realize that I need to try and get these feelings back with my wife. We talked about it the other day (should have been YEARS ago) and are starting to work on it now. Link to post Share on other sites
RealityCheck Posted May 10, 2006 Share Posted May 10, 2006 Rossm.... You are doing the right thing. For you to say that you are trying to awaken those long lost feelings with your wife is so admirable. I agree with you, that over a period of time relationships change form. This is what happened in my first marriage. We basically woke up one day and said to each other "who are you"? We were young when we got married and were so focused and driven by our careers that the relationship did suffer. The good news is we both decided it was best to go our separate ways. It was an amicible split and to this day we remain really good friends. You seem to have a good head on your shoulders and I do wish you well! Link to post Share on other sites
rossm Posted May 10, 2006 Share Posted May 10, 2006 Rossm.... You seem to have a good head on your shoulders and I do wish you well! Thanks. Generally, I'm quite rational. That's one thing that bugs me about the whole situation. The emotions took over and I completely lost control of my rationality. Link to post Share on other sites
sylviaguardian Posted May 10, 2006 Share Posted May 10, 2006 Why does it always degenerate into a catfight? Here is another perspective. My h's OW and I are probably very similar in a lot of ways: we are both slim, active, have careers that are important to us, are outgoing etc. When I asked my h what were the things that started it off in the first place, he said she was fun, carefree and really interested in him. That really hurt. At the time I was none of those because: I was recovering from a difficult birth, had a newborn and other children in the house and was trying to work from home at the same time (crazy...but there was no choice). Some days I wanted to lie down on the floor and weep with tiredness so yes, I wasn't carefree, fun or that interested in him wierdly enough. Of course after that things spiralled into a different direction: he got more into her, he became more distant, I became more frustrated and needy. At the time I thought it was just because of the circumstances and that things would get on a more even keel later. I will never know what he said to her about me but if I was guess I would say: is not interested in me or my job, depressing to be around, needy, no fun etc. The funny thing is I am sure the OW's husband thought the same about her. He had asked her for a divorce twice. Anyway, the point I'm making is that the OM would never have married the MW if she was just a horrible person. Sometimes situations get people down. I'm also sure that my husband told the OW how much fun she was, how much he loved being around her, how sexy she was etc. Of course, that makes you feel good. Being ignored does not make you feel good. Link to post Share on other sites
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