shut my eyes??

[Tomato]

My boyfriend and I are in a long distance relationship. Recently, I suspect that he is sleeping with his ex. And according to him, she has a killer body and a "sex machine" in bed. He hasn't come right out and admit it but he says IF he really indeed is sleeping with her or any other women, i shouldn't be too overly concerned cos it's just sex. He also said he won't back with her cos although they can connect physically, they can't intellectually or emotionally. He said all i should be concerned about he and me. And we have agree that he isn't to tell me anything what he does outside if he really is doing anything

 

I spoke to a few friends about this.One said i should just close my eyes and accept what i can for now and just leave when i cant or when someone comes along.Another said who cares as along as he" wipes his mouth clean" and accept what i can for now and just leave when i cant or when someone comes along.Another said who cares as long as he " wipes his mouth clean" and comes back to me at the end of the day.

 

I read somewhere in this forum where someone said men unlike women can sleep around easily without feeling anything for them while loving their gfs at the same time.Someone also said sex is just like tennis or any other sports..a game that two are playing and enjoying together.

 

The thing is i 'm not sure if he is cheating on me; he thinks i should be less paranoid and just concentrate on him and me. So should i just stop my so-called paranoia and just close my eyes to everything???

[arthropod]

well, if you'd like to begin a nice pattern of being WALKED-ON your entire life, then you should shut your eyes about this!

 

thing is, you don't KNOW he's in fact cheating on you, but it doesn't even seem like that's really the issue here. are you the kind of person that can be in an "open" relationship like this?? if he IS sleeping with someone else, do you consider this acceptable?? i'm guessing -- HELL NO!!!!

 

you can't just sit back and let people do this kind of stuff to you (once again, if he IS in fact cheating) . . . STAND UP FOR YOURSELF, and HAVE SOME PRIDE!!!

 

so, are you going to question him about your feelings?? my guess -- he's sleeping with her. it sounds like he's already giving excuses for DOING it!!

My boyfriend and I are in a long distance relationship. Recently, I suspect that he is sleeping with his ex. And according to him, she has a killer body and a "sex machine" in bed. He hasn't come right out and admit it but he says IF he really indeed is sleeping with her or any other women, i shouldn't be too overly concerned cos it's just sex. He also said he won't back with her cos although they can connect physically, they can't intellectually or emotionally. He said all i should be concerned about he and me. And we have agree that he isn't to tell me anything what he does outside if he really is doing anything

 

I spoke to a few friends about this.One said i should just close my eyes and accept what i can for now and just leave when i cant or when someone comes along.Another said who cares as along as he" wipes his mouth clean" and accept what i can for now and just leave when i cant or when someone comes along.Another said who cares as long as he " wipes his mouth clean" and comes back to me at the end of the day. I read somewhere in this forum where someone said men unlike women can sleep around easily without feeling anything for them while loving their gfs at the same time.Someone also said sex is just like tennis or any other sports..a game that two are playing and enjoying together. The thing is i 'm not sure if he is cheating on me; he thinks i should be less paranoid and just concentrate on him and me. So should i just stop my so-called paranoia and just close my eyes to everything???

[yes]

in my humble opinion, you should simply do the same - date around in your city ... and if he ever asks, tell him it's just for fun ... if u end up in a serious rel-nship w/ someone else, announce it to him ... otherwise - just have fun ... he opened the reln-ship .. it's your turn to open your side of it too ...

 

good luck!

My boyfriend and I are in a long distance relationship. Recently, I suspect that he is sleeping with his ex. And according to him, she has a killer body and a "sex machine" in bed. He hasn't come right out and admit it but he says IF he really indeed is sleeping with her or any other women, i shouldn't be too overly concerned cos it's just sex. He also said he won't back with her cos although they can connect physically, they can't intellectually or emotionally. He said all i should be concerned about he and me. And we have agree that he isn't to tell me anything what he does outside if he really is doing anything

 

I spoke to a few friends about this.One said i should just close my eyes and accept what i can for now and just leave when i cant or when someone comes along.Another said who cares as along as he" wipes his mouth clean" and accept what i can for now and just leave when i cant or when someone comes along.Another said who cares as long as he " wipes his mouth clean" and comes back to me at the end of the day. I read somewhere in this forum where someone said men unlike women can sleep around easily without feeling anything for them while loving their gfs at the same time.Someone also said sex is just like tennis or any other sports..a game that two are playing and enjoying together. The thing is i 'm not sure if he is cheating on me; he thinks i should be less paranoid and just concentrate on him and me. So should i just stop my so-called paranoia and just close my eyes to everything???

[Laurynn]

First of all, I'm afraid to have to break it to you, but you and your guy don't have a relationship....not a real one. He has no respect for you, or your so-called relationship. He's got the best of both worlds......women to screw around with when he's not with you, then you to run back to. He's a selfish, immature, possibly disease-infected louse. Let's go over some of the things you said:

 

My boyfriend and I are in a long distance relationship. Recently, I suspect that he is sleeping with his ex. And according to him, she has a killer body and a "sex machine" in bed.

What kind of DECENT, RESPECTFUL man would talk this way to his girlfriend, about his ex? He's a pig, plain and simple...and if you suspect he's sleeping with his ex, your instincts are probably right on the money, unfortunately. How can you respect a guy who talks this way about his ex? That is totally inappropriate and disrespectful. Don't you think you deserve MORE?

He hasn't come right out and admit it but he says IF he really indeed is sleeping with her or any other women, i shouldn't be too overly concerned cos it's just sex.

OH, now that's a good one. In other words, he just admitted that he is sleeping around on you (with her, or who knows who else)...but that you should just be the good little woman and not worry about it. HELLO? It's "just sex?" Sorry, that's b*llsh*t. When you're in a healthy, loving, respectful, MONOGAMOUS relationship with someone, it's not acceptable to "just have sex" with other people...then expect your partner to just forget about it. This guy is a player with a capital "P." Don't you think you deserve someone who can be faithful to you?

 

Do you like the fact that he's so carefree in his attitudes and behavior? Do you like the fact that he's putting himself at great risk of contract HIV, AIDS, Hepatitis C (all deadly/non-curable) or Herpes or Genital Warts (also non-curable), or Gonorrhea or Syphilis or Crabs or whatever......then possibly spreading these to YOU? Heck, if I was you, I'd be seriously getting myself down to the local clinic or doctor's office..and getting tested for these diseases. Did you know that Herpes and Genital Warts are two of the most common STD's out there?....and that they CAN cause "sterility" in women?....that means, they could make it impossible for you to one day have children. Is this guy worth THAT risk?? Of course he's NOT!

 

He also said he won't back with her cos although they can connect physically, they can't intellectually or emotionally. He said all i should be concerned about he and me. And we have agree that he isn't to tell me anything what he does outside if he really is doing anything

Well he's obviously not the sharpest knife in the drawer. He's already admitted to you that sleeping around is "okay" becuz it's "just sex"....so then why would he care that he can't connect with her intellectually or emotionally?

 

And you BOTH agree that he isn't going to tell you about anything he's doing outside of your relationship? (eg...him sleeping around)......are you a doormat? Don't you have any self respect or pride or self esteem? You REALLY don't mind it if he's out there, sticking his wanker into someone else and sharing that kind of intimacy? You don't WANT TO KNOW? Are you naive? Or are you brainwashed? If you agree that you don't want to know what he does behind your back, then why are you even here posting? I know why you are, becuz it bothers you.....and it SHOULD bother you!

 

Relationships are supposed to be based on TRUST, FIDELITY, HONESTY, MONOGAMY, RESPECT....so far, on his part, I don't see any of this......and it sounds like you're just going along with whatever he says and does. Are you so desperate that you're willing to be used and disrespected? Do you think he's the ONLY guy in the world? Why don't you dump his skanky a.s.s. and find a nice LOCAL guy.....one who trusts you and respects you......

 

As for your friends' advice.....are your friends on crack or something? Don't they have any self esteem either? Cripes..telling you to just accept his behavior, and that it's okay as long as he 'wipes his mouth'...what the hell is that? So it's okay if he passes on a disease to you......like HIV or AIDS, or Hepatitis C......or sexually transmitted diseases that prevent you from having children one day? Hello!?! Time to wake up and get with the program.

 

Who gives a crap what your (disillusioned) friends have to say......they obviously don't know much about respect or relationships, either.

 

You're not being paranoid....you have damn good reasons to be worried.

 

You do NOT have a relationship.......you have a situation where you're with a guy who's cheating behind your back, who's telling you that you should just accept it and not ask questions, and we have you who obviously has no self esteem or concept of what a real relationship is all about.

 

ANd don't even give me this crap about "But I LOVE HIM!"......you can't love someone who doesn't respect you, and you can't love someone you can't respect. Do you respect him when you picture him lying on top of his ex girlfriend, with her legs in the air, moaning and groaning? I'd hope not.

 

Time to wake up and get rid of this loser.

 

L

[Kris]

Oh my gosh...Laurann was RIGHT ON!!!!!!!!

 

You need to DUMP HIS A.S.S.!!!!! He's probably carrying around God knows what kinds of diseases. And he OBVIOUSLY does not love you, if he did, he wouldn't be telling you that his ex has a hot body and is a sex machine! (what the hell is that all about anyway??) Sorry, but that would be my first clue that something ain't all right with the world. You need to get a life & drop that LOSER. And while you're at it, drop those loser friends of yours too.

My boyfriend and I are in a long distance relationship. Recently, I suspect that he is sleeping with his ex. And according to him, she has a killer body and a "sex machine" in bed. He hasn't come right out and admit it but he says IF he really indeed is sleeping with her or any other women, i shouldn't be too overly concerned cos it's just sex. He also said he won't back with her cos although they can connect physically, they can't intellectually or emotionally. He said all i should be concerned about he and me. And we have agree that he isn't to tell me anything what he does outside if he really is doing anything

 

I spoke to a few friends about this.One said i should just close my eyes and accept what i can for now and just leave when i cant or when someone comes along.Another said who cares as along as he" wipes his mouth clean" and accept what i can for now and just leave when i cant or when someone comes along.Another said who cares as long as he " wipes his mouth clean" and comes back to me at the end of the day. I read somewhere in this forum where someone said men unlike women can sleep around easily without feeling anything for them while loving their gfs at the same time.Someone also said sex is just like tennis or any other sports..a game that two are playing and enjoying together. The thing is i 'm not sure if he is cheating on me; he thinks i should be less paranoid and just concentrate on him and me. So should i just stop my so-called paranoia and just close my eyes to everything???

[MercyRose]

Well...he hasn't said he is sleeping with anyone, and you have no proof of it. If he wasn't interested in you why would he bother with you and all that distance between you too.

 

What he said may just have to do with him being a bit insensitive-not uncommon in men ) Just boasting )

 

My rule with boyfriends is: no ex-girlfriend talk! I don't want to know anything. All I care about is us, the day we were together and onwards.