CJE Posted April 26, 2006 Share Posted April 26, 2006 Well it's been about three weeks since me and my fiance' split up. Just found out she is dating someone already, but more than likely she was on her way out before she was on her way out. It hurts like a bitch. Seems to consume my every waking moment. I feel so weak for this. I've got so many good things going on in my life and I am taking them for granted and neglecting them because of this girl that broke my heart, and is obviously not a bit concerned about it. I have this aching in the pit of my stomach that I can't seem to shake. It's kinda weird but it almost feels like that feeling you have when you first fall in love. That feeling in your stomach that you feel all of the time. We'll it's almost like that, but I know it's from heartache. Just wondering how long this "feeling" has lasted for everyone else. Link to post Share on other sites
lovelorcet Posted April 26, 2006 Share Posted April 26, 2006 It doesn’t go away fast at all sorry to say. Don’t try to hurry it away, just accept that it hurts and yes it does get better. You can’t measure the healing time in just days but look back in another 3 weeks or so and you may feel a difference. For me I know when my lowest point was and when I think back to that point I can feel how far I have come. But trust me it DOES get better. Link to post Share on other sites
UT_longhorn Posted April 26, 2006 Share Posted April 26, 2006 3 weeks is very short. At 3 weeks I was still a horrible mess. I felt sane after about 2 months. At 3 months, I felt much better. I'm now at the end of 4 months and I feel now that my real healing is beginging. Everyone will tell you on this site, but no contact is the best solution. I'm going to guess it feels like you're walking in some sort of dream (or nightmare). Give it time. Its not going to heal any time soon...but it will get better. And even though it seems time is moving at a snails pace right now, my 4 months seems to have passed relatively quickly. Good luck man. keep posting. Link to post Share on other sites
visotech Posted April 26, 2006 Share Posted April 26, 2006 The first few days I had a similar feeling. You know you really must love someone when the emotional pain they cause manefests physically. I got over the knotted stomach (its been 2 weeks since), but I still have a severe loss of apetite. With time all will heal Link to post Share on other sites
2020vision Posted April 26, 2006 Share Posted April 26, 2006 Well, this is not going to sound terribly encouraging, however, I still have a knot in my stomach everyonce in a while and its been about 6 months since our breakup. Mine mostly come from thinking about him and his new g/f ... *getting knot in stomach as I type* But they will be less frequent the more you live your life for you and the more time that passes by. And eventually they go away. I am sorry to hear about your split, I hope your "recovery" is peaceful in the months to come. Link to post Share on other sites
Wicked Wanda Posted April 26, 2006 Share Posted April 26, 2006 As in quitting smoking, so it is in losing a lover.... 3 hours, 3 days, 3 weeks, 3 months.... You need one to forget one.... Get out there, you're young... Live it up! Link to post Share on other sites
malcontent Posted April 26, 2006 Share Posted April 26, 2006 Man, that's a terrible story. I'm sorry for what you're going through; it honestly puts the end of my last relationship into perspective for me. I know it's cliche to say that every cloud has a silver lining, but maybe you can find some solace knowing that at least this happened before you got married as opposed to later. Some people are just selfish to the point of sociopathy, and it looks like your ex-fiance is one of them. Just as most others in this thread are saying, go no contact. I've already found that any contact I have with the ex sets me back days, if not weeks, in my healing. It's easier said than done, but nothing will help you to build yourself back up better than moving forward as if she no longer exists. Link to post Share on other sites
Author CJE Posted April 27, 2006 Author Share Posted April 27, 2006 Thanks guys, but if you read my Lovesick and Driftin post you will know that i have to work with her! This is terribile and brings me pain everyday. I'm trying to not act like it bothers me at all at work. But I have to meet her in the hallway from time to time, and hear her on the loudspeaker, and see her truck outside the building when I pull in everyday. How the hell do I recover when I can't have NC? I can't quit my job because it's paying the bills right now, and it's a good job. It's torture to get up and go in there everyday. Will the pain fade away in time where I can stick it out? I applied for a couple more jobs, so maybe I will get lucky. I will admit that I have got to the anger stage, and away from the pitty stage, or why me, and what ifs? Now I just feel anger at the way she betrayed me when I think about her, or see her. How she could get so close to my two girls(8 and 2) and just walk away from them without even saying goodbye. What a cold hearted bitch! That alone told me that she is for sure not the one for me! She's just too worried about going out and partying now, and I have already been there. I hope she has fun, because that crap gets old after a while. Link to post Share on other sites
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