love

[marissa]

I have been married for two years. I love my husband dearly and we have a good marriage, but lately I don't feel completed. The problem started when I became really good friends with my boss. We have a wonderful working relationship. I know that he has dated women in the past and has been trying to date a woman recently, but he also has really good friends that are gay and he often acts very feminine. On several occasions he has made comments that if I were single he would definitely try to date me. He buys me gifts and lunch at least once a week. Even tough I'm married and i feel certain he is bi-sexual, I have this uncontrollable longing to be with him. There is definitely chemistry there, but I don't know if I should acknowledge it.

[Magellica]

This is less a problem between you and your boss and more of a problem between you and your husband. You need to ask yourself if you are willing to throw away a marriage for what might only be a couple dates or one roll in the hay. You say you have a good marriage but there must obviously be something missing if you are looking outside the marriage to your boss. The lure of a new exciting lover is often overwhelming. To dissuade yourself from doing something you might regret you can talk to your husband about things you can do together to make your marriage more exciting so you are not as likely to search outside the marriage for happiness.

 

In addition, dating a coworker, let alone your boss, is a sticky situation, married or not. Many companies forbid this from happening for good reason. Other coworkers will resent you for getting special treatment from your boss and if you ever want to end the relationship he can hold your job over your head. You should stop accepting gifts from him and invite others to go to lunch with the two of you in order to stop a particularly unhealthy relationship from occuring.

 

One final note, I've been there and I know how hard it is to resist temptation from others when in a committed relationship. Believe me the consequences of giving into your desires are never good.

 

I hope that helps,

 

Magellica

 

I have been married for two years. I love my husband dearly and we have a good marriage, but lately I don't feel completed. The problem started when I became really good friends with my boss. We have a wonderful working relationship. I know that he has dated women in the past and has been trying to date a woman recently, but he also has really good friends that are gay and he often acts very feminine. On several occasions he has made comments that if I were single he would definitely try to date me. He buys me gifts and lunch at least once a week. Even tough I'm married and i feel certain he is bi-sexual, I have this uncontrollable longing to be with him. There is definitely chemistry there, but I don't know if I should acknowledge it.