The cellphone being dead excuse.

[daterhater]

i really hope someone is awake this late to reply and make me feel at ease. ha.

 

 

my boyfriend and i live in different towns. we always call eachother right before bed. if he is at a bar with friends, he'll call me when the bar closes. tonight he didn't call until 4am on his home phone. i grew suspicious. i asked why he didn't call sooner. he said it was because his cell phone died. supposedly this girl who has a crush on his friend got drunk and needed a ride home so he took her home and she ended up blabbing her mouth about his friend and how much she likes him and "does he like me back?" that kind of thing.

 

however, i think he's lying about the cell phone thing and if he's lying about that, he could be lying about her. with my cell phone, if it is dead it goes straight to voice mail. it does not ring. i even tested it out now. my phone is turned off. i called it on my home phone. STRAIGHT TO VOICE MAIL. his cell rang and rang and rang and rang before going to voice mail. we have different phone services, but don't all go straight to voice mail??

 

anyway, feel free to answer my silly cell phone question or share your own stories about getting the dead phone excuse for not calling you or answering your phone when with the ladies.

[Adunaphel]

I don't know about US phone services, but I believe that if you call a cell phone and it rings, then it is not dead.

 

Unless

1) it died while it was ringing, and in this case it could go from ringing to voice mail. But you should get voice mail straight away if you call a second time.

2) the cell phone is dead but all the call are being redirected to a different number.

 

It happened to me a few times that I could not call back someone or call someone when I said I would because my cell phone actually died.

Your story is strange though.

 

Could it be possible that he was not doing anything wrong, and just simply forgot to call and made up the excuse in an attempt not to look bad in your eyes?

 

Would you have any problems with him spending time talking to this girl, if you were sure she is really just interested in his friend?

 

Was it him that told you about this girl?

[Chinook]

Lady, your post more than the issue with the cell phone... screams that you're asking for help with either confirming or denying what your instincts are telling you. You have to think about the situation... if you're in a place where one missed call and going to voicemail after a period of time is leading you to think he's lying... you have to ask yourself... is that a good place to be..?

 

For me, if I felt he was lying. I would want to know why he's doing that. It can be for only two reasons... he knows you're going to freak out if he says he was simply TALKING with a girl in a car until 4am... or, he WAS doing more than TALKING..?

 

You seeing my point here...? Either way... it needs to be cleared up. Either your instincts are screaming because he is doing something he shouldn't be doing or it's because he's lying because he knows that you will THINK he's doing it!!

 

Why don't you just ask him..?

[daterhater]

I don't know about US phone services, but I believe that if you call a cell phone and it rings, then it is not dead.

 

Unless

1) it died while it was ringing, and in this case it could go from ringing to voice mail. But you should get voice mail straight away if you call a second time.

2) the cell phone is dead but all the call are being redirected to a different number.

 

It happened to me a few times that I could not call back someone or call someone when I said I would because my cell phone actually died.

Your story is strange though.

 

Could it be possible that he was not doing anything wrong, and just simply forgot to call and made up the excuse in an attempt not to look bad in your eyes?

 

Would you have any problems with him spending time talking to this girl, if you were sure she is really just interested in his friend?

 

Was it him that told you about this girl?

 

 

first of all, thanks for being online and replying. i haven't gone to bed tonight because i'm up worrying and just having someone to finally talk to about this is a huge relief.

 

 

i tried calling maybe 4 times from 11-1:30 just in case it were on and he was just not answering. i figured if i were persistent he might think something important was up and answer his phone. he could have lied to look good in my eyes. i didn't think of that. because it certainly doesn't look good to say "i heard you call, but i didn't want to be bothered by answering it."

 

 

i have a problem with him talking to her partly because i'm jealous. i know the girl is really into his friend, but she is older and really pretty and smart and funny. part of me wonders if perhaps she likes MY boyfriend too. they do get along. my boyfriend considers her his friend as well which is why he said he wanted to reach out to her and help her out by taking her drunken self home. he was the one who told me about everything that happened. i took it all the wrong way. if he would have answered his phone throughout the night, i'd feel better.

 

but the fact that perhaps he didn't answer a call from his girlfriend while with another girl has me suspicious. i know 100% he would not touch her or cheat on me with her and if he did or she kissed him, he'd tell me. what i don't know is if this chat really meant something to him and he's into her and likes her and wishes he were single.

[daterhater]

Lady, your post more than the issue with the cell phone... screams that you're asking for help with either confirming or denying what your instincts are telling you. You have to think about the situation... if you're in a place where one missed call and going to voicemail after a period of time is leading you to think he's lying... you have to ask yourself... is that a good place to be..?

 

For me, if I felt he was lying. I would want to know why he's doing that. It can be for only two reasons... he knows you're going to freak out if he says he was simply TALKING with a girl in a car until 4am... or, he WAS doing more than TALKING..?

 

You seeing my point here...? Either way... it needs to be cleared up. Either your instincts are screaming because he is doing something he shouldn't be doing or it's because he's lying because he knows that you will THINK he's doing it!!

 

Why don't you just ask him..?

 

 

hmm... good point. he definitely was only talking. my boyfriend and i have so much in common and get along great, but our personalities are quite different. i'm the quiet homebody girl. i don't go to bars for fun. i would never run into a situation where i'd need to drive a guy home drunk because that just wouldn't happen. he is super outgoing and friendly and open with everyone. he could end up sitting by an older man at a bar and end up having talked to him for an hour. he makes friends so quickly and i just can't strike up conversations like that. in our case, opposites attract and i love his personality and he loves mine. but it makes it hard for me to relate to things he does or understand how he could find himself in certain situations.

 

and because we live apart, it's important to be able to say goodnight to him on the phone before bed each night. tonight i didn't get that because his phone supposedly died when i know it didn't and it bothers me. no matter how bad the truth is, i don't want to hear a lie.

[PandorasBox]

He called you at 4am from his home phone, you asked him why didn't he call you sooner, he says to you becasue his cell was dead? Thats real fishy to me, he called you at 4am from his home phone right? So if the cell was dead, why couldn't he have called you sooner from the home phone instead of waiting till 4am? Something don't quite sit right with this. BTW, with my cell phone, if its dead, it goes right into voicemail too. Good luck.

[justagirliegirl]

I find the cell phone died is usually a lie. My kid used to do it all the time.

[daterhater]

He called you at 4am from his home phone, you asked him why didn't he call you sooner, he says to you becasue his cell was dead? Thats real fishy to me, he called you at 4am from his home phone right? So if the cell was dead, why couldn't he have called you sooner from the home phone instead of waiting till 4am? Something don't quite sit right with this. BTW, with my cell phone, if its dead, it goes right into voicemail too. Good luck.

 

 

it was fishy to me too. i mean, how convenient that's the night his phone died when he always keeps it loaded.

 

i figure... left around 1:15-1:30, took her home, talked about the guy she likes then he called me at about 3:45. that leaves about 2 hours for them to chat about him. that seems excessive even for just a friend. drunk or not. talking to a friend of a guy you're into does not take two f***ing hours.

[daterhater]

I find the cell phone died is usually a lie. My kid used to do it all the time.

 

 

i'm 23 and i still do it to my mom. but usually if i seriuosly want a night free from answering her calls, i'm smart enough to turn off my phone to make it seem like i'm not lying.

[Adunaphel]

first of all, thanks for being online and replying. i haven't gone to bed tonight because i'm up worrying and just having someone to finally talk to about this is a huge relief.

 

you are welcome. I'm glad that I was in front of the pc(here it's early in the afternoon )

 

because it certainly doesn't look good to say "i heard you call, but i didn't want to be bothered by answering it."

 

If this can mean anything, whenever I am in a noisy place (pub, anywhere music is being played)it is very unlikely that I will hear my cell phone ringing, even if they have called me multiple times.

 

If one does not wish to be bothered, he turns his cell phone off. (which btw also helps making the 'dead cell phone' excuse more believable).

 

i have a problem with him talking to her partly because i'm jealous. i know the girl is really into his friend, but she is older and really pretty and smart and funny. part of me wonders if perhaps she likes MY boyfriend too. they do get along. my boyfriend considers her his friend as well which is why he said he wanted to reach out to her and help her out by taking her drunken self home. he was the one who told me about everything that happened. i took it all the wrong way. if he would have answered his phone throughout the night, i'd feel better.

 

I am sorry that you are feeling jealous. I hope there really is nothing to be jealous of.

You should tell him about your worries, though. That you are jealous of her.

Do you know this girl well? If not, ask him to hang out with his group of friends, including this girl. See his reaction, and get to know her better. Once you get to know her, you might actually stop worrying, or get a gut feeling that something is wrong.

 

but the fact that perhaps he didn't answer a call from his girlfriend while with another girl has me suspicious. i know 100% he would not touch her or cheat on me with her and if he did or she kissed him, he'd tell me. what i don't know is if this chat really meant something to him and he's into her and likes her and wishes he were single.

 

I guess that if this is the case, you'll know it soon enough.

 

I wouldn't worry about him not answering the calls though.

 

1) he could not have heard them, perhaps when you called he was in a bar/pub where loud music was being played, with other people other than this girl. then his phone might have actually died.

2) if he had seen your calls and had something to hide, why not call you back, talk with you and get back to whatever he had to hide?

Or why not turning off his cell phone, if he was planning to give you the dead cell phone excuse?

 

Not answering your calls, not turning off your phone and not calling back (what he did)would be very stupid behaviour from someone who has something to hide.

 

I'd say do not worry, but absolutely have a talk with him and try to get to know this girl better!

[daterhater]

you are welcome. I'm glad that I was in front of the pc(here it's early in the afternoon )

 

Not answering your calls, not turning off your phone and not calling back (what he did)would be very stupid behaviour from someone who has something to hide.

 

I'd say do not worry, but absolutely have a talk with him and try to get to know this girl better!

 

 

that is a really good point. a guy who has something to hide would be sneaky/smart enough to maybe pop out of the bar to say hello (you're right, he was at a place with loud music) to ease your worries. perhaps if she was really having guy trouble and wanted a serious chat he wanted to be polite and give her his full attention and not answer a ringing cell.

 

i still might confront him about saying his cell phone was dead when it rang and rang. he could have told me he didn't hear it.

[Adunaphel]

it was fishy to me too. i mean, how convenient that's the night his phone died when he always keeps it loaded.

 

i figure... left around 1:15-1:30, took her home, talked about the guy she likes then he called me at about 3:45. that leaves about 2 hours for them to chat about him. that seems excessive even for just a friend. drunk or not. talking to a friend of a guy you're into does not take two f***ing hours.

 

If this can mean anything,I've talked about someone I liked for even longer.

 

Is this girl desperate about this friend of your boyfriend? a case of unrequited love? Or is she just interested?

 

If a friend of yours is drunk, desperate, brokenhearted and crying like a fountain about another friend of yours, it could be a good enough reason to talk for two hours late at night.

 

If she is really into your bf's friend, it could also make sense.

 

If she is only a little interested....well, it's at least obvious that your bf and her enjoy chatting together. If they have been talking for so long while you were waiting a call from him and there was no *real* need to (i mean, if she did not *need*to talk this bad), then it's different, and it's at least rude behaviour towards you.

[Adunaphel]

i still might confront him about saying his cell phone was dead when it rang and rang. he could have told me he didn't hear it.

 

Again, it could have died after the last time you called, but before the time he took it out to call you.

 

And if it was dead, how could have read that you had called on the cell phone display?

 

Anyway, whether the cell phone was dead or not is not the real issue.

the real issue is whether this girl is just a friend.

 

perhaps if she was really having guy trouble and wanted a serious chat he wanted to be polite and give her his full attention and not answer a ringing cell.

 

no, he had plenty of time to call you back. I think he might have really not heard the phone when you called.

 

Anyway if she was really having trouble, it is likely that he might not have checked the cell phone (perhaps thinking "anyway my gf can call me if she is worried") through the conversation, thus not realizing that it was dead.

 

I'm just making guesses.

[PandorasBox]

"Anyway wheather the cell phone was dead or not isn't the real issue. The real issue is wheather this girl is just a friend."

 

 

I agree, this is the main thing. If this girl needs someone to talk too, she needs to confinde in another female friend or family memeber. Not another guy who has a g/f. Thats a big no no.

[Fun2BMe]

My instincts say that he cheated with her. A phone does not ring like you say when the battery is dead. She is a hot lady, they were both drunk, he takes her home and doesn't call you until 4am with a lie about his phone.