donkey Posted May 7, 2006 Share Posted May 7, 2006 Hi, I've been dating my bf for 4 years, but to start from the begining... Before I went out with him he was really good friends with a girl. He asked her out 4 times, but she turned him down. When I came on the scene I wasn't initally that bothered by this girl friend of his - she would flirt with him a bit, but I just thought it was messing about. However, I accidently got sent a text message from him to her stating that he loved her. We had a huge arguement about it and more things came out. She flirted with him a lot, said that she loved him etc. Anyway. We almost broke up, but he said that he had no feelings for her and didn't want to hurt me so he stopped seeing her. I never really spoke to this girl before, but after this inicent she said a lot of nasty things behind my back and she tried emailing by bf to meet up and chat etc. In my mind she was properly only was interested in my bf as a friend and for the attention before I came along, but after we started dating she got annoyed that he didn't spend as much time with her. Now it's been over two years since they have properly spoken. We still live in the same neighbourhood as her and she occasionally has tried to meet up with him. I thought she had backed off, but now she's invited him to her birthday party - totally out of the blue. She obviously wants them to be friends again, but I know she hates me and I really can't trust her. Stopping my bf going to this party seems too extreme, but I don't know what to do. Btw I completely trust my bf that he wouldn't cheat on me, but this whole situation makes me feel uneasy. Advice please.... Link to post Share on other sites
amblin Posted May 7, 2006 Share Posted May 7, 2006 He shouldn't go. If he hasn't spoken to her in 2 years and they have grown distant in their friendship, then why would he want to risk his relationship with you which has been going so swell since she's been out of the picture for a sudden reunion? If he thinks it's ok, he's a tool. By going, he will reinvite her into your relationship, and it will spell mounds of trouble for you two again. And you will worry and it will bother you, I can guarantee. It's not extreme that he shouldn't go. It's logical. If your bf REALLY wants to go for some reason that would make no sense to me, then I believe you should be allowed to tag along at least. Sure, it's the girl's party, but if she really means no trouble, then she will not mind you being there with your bf and yet, she will still get to see your bf too. Plus, then you will get to see if this chick is just one of those girls who just NEEDS to have attention and manipulates guy friend and ex for the sake of causing trouble and "holding onto" them, or if she truly respects your bf and your relationship with him. Link to post Share on other sites
Author donkey Posted May 7, 2006 Author Share Posted May 7, 2006 Thanks very much for the advice! I appreciate it! Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Posted May 8, 2006 Share Posted May 8, 2006 I might have misread initial post but did he text her that HE loved her? Inappropriate - especially since this girl is obviously wants more attn than just a friend would get/give. Yes if he goes you definitely need to go - end of story. Just be strong and don't be uncomfortable when you do go...good luck Link to post Share on other sites
deelite Posted May 8, 2006 Share Posted May 8, 2006 Hell no he cant go...why would he ,why should he want to ... Link to post Share on other sites
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