When It's Over

[Shin]

Hey, I really need advice on how to tell my girlfriend it's over. We've been dating since June and made it a real boyfriend/girlfriend relationship in August. We also have a long distance relationship and I haven't seen her since August. She is coming to visit tomorrow and I just want to know what to say to her. I don't like this whole distance thing and I want to end it before I totally do something stupid like cheat on her. And for all those assuming I have, I didn't. I like her but I feel these feelings fading fast since I don't see her that much and I'm having a hard time making this work. If you guys and ladies could please let me know what to do and how to say these things. Thanks to all that help.

[darcy071]

Hey, I really need advice on how to tell my girlfriend it's over. We've been dating since June and made it a real boyfriend/girlfriend relationship in August. We also have a long distance relationship and I haven't seen her since August. She is coming to visit tomorrow and I just want to know what to say to her. I don't like this whole distance thing and I want to end it before I totally do something stupid like cheat on her. And for all those assuming I have, I didn't. I like her but I feel these feelings fading fast since I don't see her that much and I'm having a hard time making this work. If you guys and ladies could please let me know what to do and how to say these things. Thanks to all that help. Honesty is the best policy, do not beat around the bush be direct but tactfull.

[female aries]

that's a really difficult thing to do, but you should try to sit her down and say basically what you posted. Say that you feel unconfortable with a long distance relationship because it is creating frustrations. Tell her you don't want to do something stupid like cheat on her. You just need something more stable in your life, someone to be there closer to you and a long distance relationship does not afford that. That's the best I can do for you, good luck.

[Ed]

So you decided to be boyfriend and girlfriend at the same time you became separated from each other. I guess I don't have to tell you that was a bad move. Relationships have enough pitfalls without adding miles between you.

 

It's good that you have a chance to see her and tell her, in person, that this is not working for you. It would be better if you could go to where she lives to tell her this.

 

Anyway, since you feel the way you do it is best that you go ahead and tell her as soon as possible. Be as kind about it as you know how to be. Don't sit there and apologize over and over. Just tell her it's best for you to end the relationship, as it stands, now.

 

You didn't say whether the problem for you is distance or a lack of interest, but if you really have no interest in her, don't lead her to believe that things could be different otherwise. That may only give her hope that seeing you more often would solve the problem. On the other hand, if distance is the problem then maybe something could be worked out, depending on your individual circumstances.

 

Whatever the circumstances or situation is, if you have no interest, don't lead her to believe otherwise. If distance is the problem and you see no good way to resolve it, then break up with her. I can't give you the words to use. You'll just have to do the best you can.