how to trust again?

[daisi]

Please help me. My boyfriend recently had a one night stand and is VERY sorry about it. We have talked about it at lenth & I know that he is very remorseful for what he did & we just want to put it behind us and move on with our lives. Here's the problem: in my heart I know that he won't do this again and if he does, he knows that I'll walk...no questions asked. So here's my question, how can I trust him again? PLEASE don't tell me to dump him because we've talked about it a lot and decided TOGETHER that we want to work it out. I know what happened was a one time thing and it won't happen again, but how can I put it behind me and trust again? Again...please don't tell me to dump him...I believe that everyone makes mistakes & deserves a 2nd chance..but no 3rd, 4th, 5th, ect. chances!!!! (That's why if it happens again I'M GONE) We have a very close relationship & have been together for 4+ years & we've discussed getting married in a couple years after we're done w/ college. So this is a serious relationship & one that BOTH of us want to last. Anyway, thanks for listening & please respond!

[monica]

Please help me. My boyfriend recently had a one night stand and is VERY sorry about it. We have talked about it at lenth & I know that he is very remorseful for what he did & we just want to put it behind us and move on with our lives. Here's the problem: in my heart I know that he won't do this again and if he does, he knows that I'll walk...no questions asked. So here's my question, how can I trust him again? PLEASE don't tell me to dump him because we've talked about it a lot and decided TOGETHER that we want to work it out. I know what happened was a one time thing and it won't happen again, but how can I put it behind me and trust again? Again...please don't tell me to dump him...I believe that everyone makes mistakes & deserves a 2nd chance..but no 3rd, 4th, 5th, ect. chances!!!! (That's why if it happens again I'M GONE) We have a very close relationship & have been together for 4+ years & we've discussed getting married in a couple years after we're done w/ college. So this is a serious relationship & one that BOTH of us want to last. Anyway, thanks for listening & please respond!

[monica]

well you should stay with him but he has to work really hard to gain your trust back and if he does what he did again then get rid off him and besides he is doing you a favor by doing so it is better now than later to find out what type of person he is

[danny]

monica i hate to say this but i have done the same thing to my girlfriend about 2years ago and swore i would never do it again. but 2 g.f's later i'm still saying i'm sorry.

 

point is once a cheater allways a cheater!

[David]

It will never work, unless you are naive, sorry to say. But, trust is not something that can be learned or built back up, it is either there or not. You have to take him back unconditionally, or not at all and be ready for him to do it again.