Spiderman Posted May 18, 2006 Share Posted May 18, 2006 Hey. I'm trying to be honest here. Why is that so wrong? What gives you the right to insult me? And more importantly, why are you? This is all you know of me. I might be your best friend. This "honesty is the best policy" ideal is wonderful in theory. In practice? Not so much. True, I grant you there's no need for me to insult you, you seem to be doing a good enough job of that yourself. My best friend hey!? Well he's gay, so unless it blokes you're talking about banging, it's not you! Link to post Share on other sites
basscatcher Posted May 18, 2006 Share Posted May 18, 2006 If this is the lifestyle you want. It is apparent your fiance doesn't agree with it. I suggest you find a women who accepts that way as a lifestyle. Those that do are as follows: China Mongolia Hong Kong Macau it occurs in Taiwan India The Mormons do it. Islamic has it Most of the muslim cultures accept it. It is not always legal but it still happens. Thats where you need to find a woman who will accept your lifestyle choice. Your not going to find much support in this forum because I believe most of the posters are of Western beliefs. Link to post Share on other sites
hotgurl Posted May 18, 2006 Share Posted May 18, 2006 yeah but you don't believe in the kind of marriage your wife does. I think marriage is a union between two people but the people in that union decides what marriage means to them as a couple usually it is similar idea. Your wife's idea of marriage and you idea of marriage is so different. did you eevr ask her what marriage means to her? answer my other question dammit I really want to know! Link to post Share on other sites
Author CalHound Posted May 18, 2006 Author Share Posted May 18, 2006 This "honesty is the best policy" ideal is wonderful in theory. In practice? Not so much. True, I grant you there's no need for me to insult you, you seem to be doing a good enough job of that yourself. My best friend hey!? Well he's gay, so unless it blokes you're talking about banging, it's not you! I should be able to be honest here of all places. You don't have any reason to be offended by me. And, no, no banging blokes here, although I have no problem with gay people at all. Link to post Share on other sites
TheDiva Posted May 18, 2006 Share Posted May 18, 2006 Loving her aside... WHY do you want to marry her? People can love each other and not be married. People can love each other and commit to live out their lives together without the marriage ceremony. Is it because she requires the 'piece of paper'? To most people that see someone wearing a ring, and knowing that they have that piece of paper says, 'hands off, I am committed to ONE person'. I just don't understand what marriage would do for the both of you. Link to post Share on other sites
blind_otter Posted May 18, 2006 Share Posted May 18, 2006 No. I love her. I want to be married to her. I don't need justification. A piece of paper signed by Loveshack isn't going to get me anywhere. I just wanted to talk about it with different people. Gees. Well yeah, you love her. Why can't you guys just live together, then? Are you going to omit certain parts of the marriage vows, at least? So then you won't be pledging to do something you don't intend on doing, in front of all your friends, family, and, if you believe in it, God.... At the very least you can be aman of your word, right??? Link to post Share on other sites
2sunny Posted May 18, 2006 Share Posted May 18, 2006 I smell a troll! Link to post Share on other sites
Author CalHound Posted May 18, 2006 Author Share Posted May 18, 2006 Well yeah, you love her. Why can't you guys just live together, then? Are you going to omit certain parts of the marriage vows, at least? So then you won't be pledging to do something you don't intend on doing, in front of all your friends, family, and, if you believe in it, God.... At the very least you can be aman of your word, right??? It is not going to be a religious ceremony. Neither of us are religious. It is a ceremony of love and marriage only. Why are you people calling me names? Do you know her or something? Link to post Share on other sites
SmoochieFace Posted May 18, 2006 Share Posted May 18, 2006 Why are you people calling me names? Since you're new here I must explain something to you about this zoo. Name-calling is a tired but still thriving tactic used by frustrated and insecure people when they aren't *having their way* with you or anyone else. Trust me on this - I have been on the receiving end of it many times. Actually, it's quite hilarious. In time, you will understand what I mean. Link to post Share on other sites
quankanne Posted May 18, 2006 Share Posted May 18, 2006 DH and I got married in front of a county clerk, and I distinctly recall the "forsaking all others" bit in our marriage, so it's not just a religious basis for marriage, but a legal one. as for my friends knowing where they stand – they know my opinions on certain topics will never vary, and I think they depend on that when questions like these come up. So maybe I wouldn't kick them, but I'd definitely talk them to death on the subject until they saw the other side before making a true decision. I guess what is hard for all of us here to understand is how you want to precede with a marriage when you're not 100 percent committed to it. We'd be ragging out just about anyone who isn't going into it fully willing. Link to post Share on other sites
basscatcher Posted May 18, 2006 Share Posted May 18, 2006 Doesn't matter what we say LSr's he has his mind set. He is blowing air to stir the community. He sounds kinda like maybe he thinks he is always right. That his beliefs are NEVER wrong and its ok to do what HE believes is correct regarless of another persons values or morals. Look at the response he got out of all of us? ""AND so fast."" I bet he feels good about this. Most posts don't get this fast of attention unless its a long-timer and/or the regulars know the persons story. Something is definitely off with this..? I'm outta here!! I'm not gonna bash my head into a wall anymore. It's starting to hurt. I feel sorry for the woman if the OP is real and honest about this thread. Link to post Share on other sites
TeaCooler Posted May 18, 2006 Share Posted May 18, 2006 DH and I got married in front of a county clerk, and I distinctly recall the "forsaking all others" bit in our marriage, so it's not just a religious basis for marriage, but a legal one. I guess what is hard for all of us here to understand is how you want to precede with a marriage when you're not 100 percent committed to it. We'd be ragging out just about anyone who isn't going into it fully willing. Okay. Then will I go to jail for this? I doubt it. I know what you're saying, and I appreciate it. But I don't see how anyone can say that I am not 100% committed to my wife-to-be just because of this. And I say "just because of this" because to me that's all it is. It's just sex. Some of you seem to think that just because I feel this way means I am trying to bang anything that moves. I'm not. I haven't cheated yet, but I haven't wanted to. If I do want to though, to me, it wouldn't mean anything more than sex. You think I'm crazy, but your ideas are just as different to me as mine are to you. Link to post Share on other sites
SmoochieFace Posted May 18, 2006 Share Posted May 18, 2006 Okay. Then will I go to jail for this? I doubt it. I know what you're saying, and I appreciate it. But I don't see how anyone can say that I am not 100% committed to my wife-to-be just because of this. And I say "just because of this" because to me that's all it is. It's just sex. Some of you seem to think that just because I feel this way means I am trying to bang anything that moves. I'm not. I haven't cheated yet, but I haven't wanted to. If I do want to though, to me, it wouldn't mean anything more than sex. You think I'm crazy, but your ideas are just as different to me as mine are to you. ... TeaCooler=CalHound? Link to post Share on other sites
barfool Posted May 18, 2006 Share Posted May 18, 2006 What is right for you, is right. What is right for her, is right. What is right for each of you, is totally wrong for the other. The key is finding out what is right for you both. I think pre-marital couples counseling is an excellent idea. Then you can talk this out as a couple and not as individuals trying to adapt to what each of you feels is wrong for you. This is what I think you need to pay attention to. Part of loving someone is honesty and a desire to make them happy. I am not a monogomy-type person either but I am up front with all of my partners on exactly how things stand. Since you do love her you need to not lie to her and realize that for each of your happiness there will have to be compromises. Neither of you are right when it comes to the relationship when you have conflicting desires and one person loses out completely. You are only right when both of you are happy. Link to post Share on other sites
basscatcher Posted May 18, 2006 Share Posted May 18, 2006 ... TeaCooler=CalHound? wow- he was playing a troll not to get flamed.. Link to post Share on other sites
TeaCooler Posted May 18, 2006 Share Posted May 18, 2006 Doesn't matter what we say LSr's he has his mind set. He is blowing air to stir the community. Kind of like you are, with that post? Stir the community? Please. I asked a question. I shared my story. That's what this is for. If you let it stir you up, I can't help that. Try a helmet on that head, but don't stop bashing it against the wall. It seems to be what you do best. Thanks to those of you who had something of substance to say, even if you didn't agree with me. I did not expect anyone to hail cal, I know this is unusual. Just wanted to talk, I guess. Link to post Share on other sites
theantibarbie23 Posted May 18, 2006 Share Posted May 18, 2006 As careful as you might be while cheating, things don't always go as planned. Condoms aren't a shield against everything. People still can get sick or pregnant using them. Even if you think she wouldn't be very suprised if she found out, it would still hurt her. Not only the infidelity but the lies. Relationships in which there is no trust tend to implode. Is casual sex really worth the risk of harming your own wife on an emotional, mental, or physical level? Is it worth the possiblity of ending your relationship with her for good? I'm not saying it's going to happen to you but the possibility is there. You better be sure that it's a gamble you're willing to take before you start down that path. Link to post Share on other sites
SmoochieFace Posted May 18, 2006 Share Posted May 18, 2006 wow- he was playing a troll not to get flamed.. Yes indeedy. I guess he thought we would be too *slow* to catch on. Somebody just lost some credibility here... Link to post Share on other sites
basscatcher Posted May 18, 2006 Share Posted May 18, 2006 Kind of like you are, with that post? I don't play troll. I am who I am. I believe is someone doesn't like me for me then its their loss they didn't see who I am on the inside and lost a sincere, caring person who try's to understand others. Yet, I have my own convictions based on my beliefs. Which, tend to fall mostly in the norm. If you let it stir you up, I can't help that. I'm a caring person and I feel intensely. I wont apoligize or feel bad for that. Try a helmet on that head, but don't stop bashing it against the wall. It seems to be what you do best. I don't give up easily. This is why I bash my head.. Helmet--yes that would help but they crack too under enough stress. I did not expect anyone to hail cal, I know this is unusual. Just wanted to talk, I guess. You have already been a member of LS where people know you as teacooler. With the reputation you have gained what makes you think you would have been flamed worse using your known name then a alias. At least with some integrity behind your known screen name you would have recieved a bit more sensitivity---at least this is what I think. People tend to sympathize and be more sensitive towards persons they know then strangers.. This doesn't mean I agree with your philosophy though. Link to post Share on other sites
2sunny Posted May 18, 2006 Share Posted May 18, 2006 Yes indeedy. I guess he thought we would be too *slow* to catch on. Somebody just lost some credibility here... For some reason I pegged him as a troll the minute I was reading.... I also hate it when people pretend to be someone they are not....even in cyber space... NOW he will need to create a third new name for himself! Link to post Share on other sites
SmoochieFace Posted May 18, 2006 Share Posted May 18, 2006 Just wanted to talk, I guess. So why did you have to grab an alias and do it? Where are your testicles? Link to post Share on other sites
basscatcher Posted May 18, 2006 Share Posted May 18, 2006 NOW he will need to create a third new name for himself! He can talk to himself in the third person then.. And it will look real.. Link to post Share on other sites
basscatcher Posted May 18, 2006 Share Posted May 18, 2006 Where are your testicles? Lost in the wetness somewhere? jk Link to post Share on other sites
2sunny Posted May 18, 2006 Share Posted May 18, 2006 He can talk to himself in the third person then.. And it will look real.. Third person singular - Teacooler believes he should be able to put his goods wherever teacooler wishes without any consequences.... Link to post Share on other sites
Alexandra Posted May 18, 2006 Share Posted May 18, 2006 "why can't i get my d*** wet somewhere else?" You can. It will just hurt her. Link to post Share on other sites
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