snooky 1 Posted May 19, 2006 Share Posted May 19, 2006 Hello, this is my first time on a site like this, didn't know that there were so many people that felt like me. Anyway, I am 26, I have 3 kids all by my husband. My husband confessed to cheating on me about 4 years ago, he said that I now know everything and that there was no more secrets. Well 2 weeks later he comes to me and tells me that there were 2 other girls that I didn't know about. So after 3 years of trying to hang in there and work it out he comes to me and says that it wa never 3 girls that it was only the one. I asked him why would he lie about something like that and his answer was he didn't want me to think that he was into white girls(the first time the girl was white) so he made up a story about 2 black girls. Since that day I don't know what to believe, no man in his right mind would come home and make up a story about him cheating if it weren't true. At first he was doing everything in his power to say sorry and make everything better until he decided that he had done enough. He then felt like if I can't get over it by now then we don't need to be together. Well needless to say I got up and left with the kids last year, and stayed gone for 6 months. He had a lot of relationships with females and I had a relationship with a guy. Make a long story short we got back together and it isn't any better. I for some reason feel the need to know things that went on when we weren't together but he feels like It has nothing to do with us now. I think I want to know just to see if he is capable of telling me the truth. I am constantly telling him that I want to know the truth about everything no matter how much he thinks it will hurt me, in the end it would have helped a lot just knowing that he told me the truth. For instance I asked him if any of the females at his work try to talk to him, he tells me NO . Then I say they don't even say hi to you, again I get a NO. Now we all know that when you see someone in passing they speak. but he wants me to believe that no female ever says ANYTHING to him. s*** like that pisses me off, if you lie about something that small then you will definitly lie about something that's bigger. How do I get him to tell the truth about everything..... Link to post Share on other sites
ridingthebulls Posted May 19, 2006 Share Posted May 19, 2006 you should have forced him to tell the truth to you before he ever moved back. Link to post Share on other sites
My_Other_I Posted May 20, 2006 Share Posted May 20, 2006 you should have forced him to tell the truth to you before he ever moved back. How exactly are you gonna 'force' someone to tell you the truth? Snooky, I don't think there is a way to make him to be honest with you unless he chooses to. From what you wrote I don't think that's gonna happen. Pack his bags and find you a real man, you will do your kids and yourself a big favor. Link to post Share on other sites
Galaxy Posted May 21, 2006 Share Posted May 21, 2006 Forcing; I believe they meant by giving an ultimatum. He should come clean before he ever moves back in with her or before they reconcile. Sounds smart. She caved in too quickly. Link to post Share on other sites
My_Other_I Posted May 21, 2006 Share Posted May 21, 2006 But how are you gonna know that he is actually telling the truth? He's been lying about everything, what would make him change when he gets ultimatum? Link to post Share on other sites
ridingthebulls Posted June 2, 2006 Share Posted June 2, 2006 Read thoroughly MR- i - want -to -argue... this man is not sharing ANY info with her. If she didn't like that, she should have told him to tell her exactly how many women he slept with before she let him back in the house. If he didn't like it or told her again to "get over it", then she hangs up and just refuses to speak to him. It's quite simple. I don't understand what the constant silly questions are for. If he knows it's either THAT or the relationship IS over, then we will see if he feels it's worth saving or not by coming clean. If it isn't worth saving, then she can do better. If she is that desperate to know the truth before continuing the relationship, then get a lie detector test done. End of story. Link to post Share on other sites
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