his anger

[kat]

my boyfriend got realy mad at me and said some hurtful things and i feel like leaving because i think this is his true feelings when he is mad. what should i do, it don't matter what the content was it's just that he said them and has apologized but i'm still feeling hurt and resentful about what he said. this happens when he gets really mad at me only, otherwise he is ok, it's just when i push the wrong buttons. should i forgive and move on, or do you think his feelings when he is angry are his true feelings, i feel like such a pain in his side, what can i do, how can i forget what he said to me? i really hurt in side, maybe the truth hurts, but i dunno.

[velvet]

Content matters to me. I have been marked forever by other peoples words many times. Next time walk away, dont give him the satisfaction of bringing you down. Than next time he feels like it again he might slow down and rethink, before he talks....Just a thought

my boyfriend got realy mad at me and said some hurtful things and i feel like leaving because i think this is his true feelings when he is mad. what should i do, it don't matter what the content was it's just that he said them and has apologized but i'm still feeling hurt and resentful about what he said. this happens when he gets really mad at me only, otherwise he is ok, it's just when i push the wrong buttons. should i forgive and move on, or do you think his feelings when he is angry are his true feelings, i feel like such a pain in his side, what can i do, how can i forget what he said to me? i really hurt in side, maybe the truth hurts, but i dunno.

[witchbreed]

Its kind of hard to give you any counsel with so little information.

 

I dont know if he tells his true feelings when angry or not. Most of the times, I would say not really. A lot of men, have not learned to express their own hurt and insecurities and if they feel hurt and insecure, some of them start to leash out. Actually inside they often feel more like crying and since they cant handle that - they go into attack mode. And then they talk themselves into being angrier and angrier, so they will not feel their hurt.

 

Talk to him about your feelings when you both are in a really good mood, dont accuse him of really meaning what he said to you, but DO tell him, how it made you feel, that you are still hurt and insecure about his real feelings. You might be astounded what will come out.

 

In the beginning of my relationsship with my bf, he did feel insecure about my feelings and got really jealous and when he was low, he did attack me, accusing me of fancying other men and so on. He split a couple times for that reason. In the meantime he has been able to tell me, that he was so scared of me leaving him and not to be able to handle that hurt, that he kind of choose to "attack" me, hating himself for saying hurtful things to me while he did, but not able to stop himself at the time. Now, that he feels more secure in our relationsship he doesnt "need" this no more and is able to show his hurts and fears.

 

All the best.