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Torn in Three


Mandy

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I'm torn in three pieces right now.

 

The first belongs to my exboyfriend, Luke. We broke up on Thursday, October 10, after 3 years. (I am 20, he is 21) We broke up on good terms, agreeing that we just don't work anymore (some of you may know what I am talking about).

 

The second piece belongs to this really nice guy from my Economics class, Don. He has shown interest in me, but I barely know him.

 

The last piece belongs to me, who wants to get on with my life, sans boyfriend (or maybe not).

 

Last night, Luke called me, he asked me about something that he might want to borrow, and we talked for an hour about the past and the good memories that we had together. I admitted that I was crying, and when I told him that, he said that he wanted to cry too.

 

Today, Don from my class said that he would like to study with me, see me during the weeked and stuff. This sounds harmless, but everytime he comes into class, he always smiles at me and I find myself smiling back. I think about him when I'm not in class, and although I will not call him this weekend to do anything (for fear of feeling slutty - I JUST BROKE UP ON THURSDAY) I would like to. I know he has an interest in me, but I don't know if I should go further.

 

I want to give myself time to grow up and do things as a single girl, but both boys are on my mind constantly. I know Luke and I will not get back together (he also wants to grow up as a single man) at least for now, but I know the feelings are still there. Don is a very sweet person and I like the attention that he is giving me, but I don't know if I'm ready for anything. It's like my mind is saying no, but my heart is saying yes.

 

You see, I'm torn in three - How could I put myself back together?

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Luke is over. Things will never work with him, as you have admitted, so cease contact with him for a period of time until you can get over him.

 

Go ahead and study with Don and do some harmless stuff but let him know you are getting out of a relationship and you want nothing serious. If he tries to be anything more than a friend, bow out for now. There's nothing wrong with spending some time with him if things can be kept on a friendship level.

 

Give yourself some time to heal before you get into another relationship. And don't put yourself through a lot of head crap by continuing to talk to Luke and by seeing him under any circumstances. That deal is O-V-E-R!!! A break up is a break up.

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About a year and a half ago, I was in the same situation. I had just broken up with my boyfriend, who I felt very attached to, on Wednesday. On Saturday, this guy that was always very flirty, asking me to dinner and stuff, happened to come into my work. We started talking, and decided to go out on Monday night. We just had dinner and went to a movie...it was almost like being with a guy friend, because he didn't try to make any moves on me or anything, but I still had a great time. Our next date was the next weekend and we sat and talked until 4am. That was last June, and I am still very happy. Point of my story...this new guy might be the "one" you were looking for to begin with.

 

Peaches

I'm torn in three pieces right now. The first belongs to my exboyfriend, Luke. We broke up on Thursday, October 10, after 3 years. (I am 20, he is 21) We broke up on good terms, agreeing that we just don't work anymore (some of you may know what I am talking about). The second piece belongs to this really nice guy from my Economics class, Don. He has shown interest in me, but I barely know him. The last piece belongs to me, who wants to get on with my life, sans boyfriend (or maybe not). Last night, Luke called me, he asked me about something that he might want to borrow, and we talked for an hour about the past and the good memories that we had together. I admitted that I was crying, and when I told him that, he said that he wanted to cry too. Today, Don from my class said that he would like to study with me, see me during the weeked and stuff. This sounds harmless, but everytime he comes into class, he always smiles at me and I find myself smiling back. I think about him when I'm not in class, and although I will not call him this weekend to do anything (for fear of feeling slutty - I JUST BROKE UP ON THURSDAY) I would like to. I know he has an interest in me, but I don't know if I should go further. I want to give myself time to grow up and do things as a single girl, but both boys are on my mind constantly. I know Luke and I will not get back together (he also wants to grow up as a single man) at least for now, but I know the feelings are still there. Don is a very sweet person and I like the attention that he is giving me, but I don't know if I'm ready for anything. It's like my mind is saying no, but my heart is saying yes. You see, I'm torn in three - How could I put myself back together?
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