Author RealityCheck Posted May 23, 2006 Author Share Posted May 23, 2006 Rossm... *clink* I'll drink to that! *laughing* The beach is very much in my immediate plans. Link to post Share on other sites
rossm Posted May 23, 2006 Share Posted May 23, 2006 Rossm... The beach is very much in my immediate plans. *jealous* Link to post Share on other sites
zarathustra Posted May 23, 2006 Share Posted May 23, 2006 Zara Baby!!!! Welcome home! *squeeze* I do agree with you whole heartedly in the fact that just because his life is so f***ed up, doesn't mean he should f*** mine up too! But then it does all come back to my choice. I know this! Your story scares the hell out of me! Sheeesh...you two even moved in together and the idiot still went back to his W.!!! Man! that's gotta hurt something fierce! Zara...*laughing* I'm not going to place bets with you this time, because I believe he will contact me by the weekend. I just can feel it! Hell! I still got to get access to ping so I can send out those 10 peanuts I owe you via Fed EX.....lol When he called me to tell me he is going NC, he was crying like a baby! Boo...hoo! I will state for the record "not one tear shed from my eyes"! I think I was in shock more than anything! I do feel I cried enough tears in NC and I haven't got any to spare on him. Yeah, mine did the same. You are absolutely right, it is YOUR choice. He can call, email, show up, etc., but ultimately you have the power to choose the outcome. I know its harder if he's in your face, but I know you'll get back to where you were 3 weeks ago. I think you are 1/2 way there already. Hugs to you, my dear friend. Link to post Share on other sites
eyeswideshut Posted May 24, 2006 Share Posted May 24, 2006 RC, OMG.... how are you doing today? what do you do about this? How are you going to let go? I mean, you were fine in NC weren't you? Then he came back to drag you back in!!!??!! You need to try to remember what life was like before him, how you werem and what goals you had for yourself and relationships. What if he tries to contact you this weekend? What are you going to do? When you were in NC, how did you first initiate it, and how many times a week did he try to break it???? I suggest you really try to cut ties, I mean, how can you trust him, he seems so unstable right now... Weren't you fine being FWB?? and that whole bit!??! Oh RC, please tell us you are okay!!! :( Link to post Share on other sites
eyeswideshut Posted May 24, 2006 Share Posted May 24, 2006 may I also ask why you have that non live-in rule?? Does that mean forever?? just wondering. (i have that rule too...) but that was just because I was either too anal, too afraid of commitment, too afraid of marriage, etc.... with my MM, I would have him move in in a second. weird thought. Link to post Share on other sites
eyeswideshut Posted May 24, 2006 Share Posted May 24, 2006 may I also ask why you have that non live-in rule?? Does that mean forever?? just wondering. (i have that rule too...) but that was just because I was either too anal, too afraid of commitment, too afraid of marriage, etc.... with my MM, I would have him move in in a second. weird thought. Link to post Share on other sites
Author RealityCheck Posted May 24, 2006 Author Share Posted May 24, 2006 EWS..... Hey you!! I'm doing fine. In fact, since his call on the weekend, everyday seems to get better! I'm in "mad" mode right now and I hope to stay there because it just helps me to get over it easier! If he contacts me, by email, I know I will NOT respond, however I have no control if he should show up at my door. I tend to get a little weak when I see him face to face. As far as my position to remain in a "non-live-in relationship" is because I truly am most content on my own. It's not about committment because I am totally committed to my kids and my career! I have lived common-law twice and have been married twice. Each one was different from the other, so I can't even say that I am drawn to the same type of man in my choices! For me, I have a tendency of getting bored real quick and men just have a tendency of getting lazy in many respects, especially the romance department. I can fall in love as fast as fall out if the relationship isn't nurtured on "both" parties involved. So knowing what I know today, I can't be bothered busting my a$$ for someone who doesn't do the same. I realize a relationship is work, but two have to participate. Until I find my equal on all levels, I choose to remain without a "live-in" forever. And; you know, I'm fine with that! Link to post Share on other sites
lovernotafighter Posted May 24, 2006 Share Posted May 24, 2006 Seriously, I don't know whether to laugh or smuck myself up side the head! Most of you know my story of how I was NC for 5 1/2 months then my MM came to my door only 2 weekends ago a mess wanting to see me in which I agreed because it kept me in a "non-committed relationship. Well this weekend I got a call from my MM saying that he will be going NC. Why? Because he said he had a long talk with his W for the first time in 4 freakin years and he felt that he should really try to work on the M. I don't want to be misunderstood, so I'm going to tell you all that I said to him I thought he was doing the right thing! I am all for trying to repair a marriage. My dilema is.... I have a gut and intuitive feeling this sagma is not over! Thing is, I'm really beginning to feel more like a yo-yo with this guy! The way I see it is, if he wants to stay, freakin stay! If he chooses to go, freakin go! But all in all I'm getting a little tired of going on "HIS" rollar coaster ride. I guess you all would agree that he really should "Fix Himself" right? Zara WWIU MO Sami BI SL LNF HELP! Anyone out there! Needing some opinions! Man! I'm pissed!hey RC ! I can't believe your MM! what is with these guys? you know what,the first NC me and my MM had was after our first PA encounter which the next day he told me he was falling in love with me...three days later he told me couldn't see me again! 2 weeks later he begged me to forgive him! he was confused yadda,yadda. I think your saga isn't over yet either but I wish I had good advice..I believe you said the right thing..but you can bet he'll be back Link to post Share on other sites
Author RealityCheck Posted May 24, 2006 Author Share Posted May 24, 2006 LNF.... You know, sometimes having to step back from a situation brings alot of clarity! In the last two days, much of his yo-yo that ultimately makes me a yo-yo is that his W has these "mood swings". If you all think the MM is selfish, his W certainly can give them a run for their money! His W is one of those "emotional abusive" types. So whenever the mood moves her, she'll say something nice that gives him some hope in his M. I know this all too well with my ex H. The difference is, I didn't tolerate it and left. Much like your MM, mine has the internal fight to stay for the sake of their child. I cannot judge this, because everyone has their own reasons for staying. I have come to the conclusion, if he does contact me I will tell him.... "if you want to stay for whatever reason Stay"! "if you want to leave, leave!" Either way, it makes no difference to me. What does matter to me, and that I am not prepared to deal with is your need to come and go in my life because of your W's ever changing mood swings. I will enforce the fact that because he chooses to accept that in his life, don't expect the same from me. I refuse to be a part of his W's abuse and hop on that rollar coaster ride with him! No way! Not going there! Link to post Share on other sites
movinon05 Posted May 24, 2006 Share Posted May 24, 2006 That is exactly what you should say!! And now that you know he's waffled again like that recent weekend, you'll be better prepared for when he comes crying at your door again. Link to post Share on other sites
Author RealityCheck Posted May 24, 2006 Author Share Posted May 24, 2006 MO.... Thanks Dolly! You know I adore you and your comments! Muahhhhh Link to post Share on other sites
movinon05 Posted May 24, 2006 Share Posted May 24, 2006 MO.... Thanks Dolly! You know I adore you and your comments! Muahhhhh Are we drinkin' tonight? I'm actually enjoying my new found freedom. Cleaning and drinking!! Ya gotta do what works, right? Link to post Share on other sites
Author RealityCheck Posted May 24, 2006 Author Share Posted May 24, 2006 MO.... *laughing* I love drinking and cleaning! Honestly! By the time I'm finished cleaning I got a good buzz and my house is clean! I just fininshed working out, and I've got to do a "Bud" run! I'll be back! I have to admit, I'm hurting a little with over the MM s***! *Sigh* Link to post Share on other sites
movinon05 Posted May 24, 2006 Share Posted May 24, 2006 MO.... *laughing* I love drinking and cleaning! Honestly! By the time I'm finished cleaning I got a good buzz and my house is clean! I just fininshed working out, and I've got to do a "Bud" run! I'll be back! I have to admit, I'm hurting a little with over the MM s***! *Sigh* NOthing a few beers and chit chat about the Ben Franklin's in this world won't cure!! Get your supply and come back!!! Link to post Share on other sites
Author RealityCheck Posted May 24, 2006 Author Share Posted May 24, 2006 MO.... *clink* Back! How is Ben by the way? *laughing* Link to post Share on other sites
movinon05 Posted May 24, 2006 Share Posted May 24, 2006 MO.... *clink* Back! How is Ben by the way? *laughing* Aw geez, can't anybody feel sorry for me about this?? I may live outside of Philadelphia and have been to Ben's house, but does that mean I'm doomed? Was it a sign I missed?? Link to post Share on other sites
Author RealityCheck Posted May 24, 2006 Author Share Posted May 24, 2006 MO.... Feel sorry for you? *laughing* Heck you wouldn't want that anyway! Summer days are here and I gotta tell you, I'm am definately going to get my Groove on! Canada is God's country! Its so beautiful here! I may be hurtin a little, but I'm sure when I get my first taste of our beaches, it will all be forgotton! Pack a bag along with Zara and some of the other ladies here and come on down! We would have so much fun! Plenty of room here to board the bunch! *clink* Link to post Share on other sites
movinon05 Posted May 24, 2006 Share Posted May 24, 2006 Aw geez! Canada is my absolute favorite place in the world. Nova Scotia!! Oh, I miss it so much!! You're in Manitoba, right? I think if memory serves me right. And that's way west? Link to post Share on other sites
Author RealityCheck Posted May 24, 2006 Author Share Posted May 24, 2006 MO... You are correct! "Friendly Manitoba" is on our license plates! Come on down! I do believe I can accomodate 6 for sure! Link to post Share on other sites
movinon05 Posted May 24, 2006 Share Posted May 24, 2006 But you're so friggin far west!! Geez! What states are you above? The furthest west I'll probably get is facing west in my yard to get some color! Link to post Share on other sites
Author RealityCheck Posted May 25, 2006 Author Share Posted May 25, 2006 MO... Sorry, I went off-line to watch American Idol!! Yahooooooo "Tyler Hicks* WON! I'll be scooping up his CD's in the near future! Um...Geography is not one of my best knowledgeable subjects, but put it this way, I can drive to Grande Forks in two hours! *laughing* So I would have to say North Dakota. Link to post Share on other sites
movinon05 Posted May 25, 2006 Share Posted May 25, 2006 Ha!! So did I!! Yeah for Taylor Hicks!! lol! Link to post Share on other sites
Author RealityCheck Posted May 25, 2006 Author Share Posted May 25, 2006 MO..... Oh yes! Tyler Hicks! He's one of those singers that give me goose bumps!! I blasted the volume on my T.V.! *laughing* I didn't want to miss a note! Link to post Share on other sites
lovernotafighter Posted May 25, 2006 Share Posted May 25, 2006 MO..... Oh yes! Tyler Hicks! He's one of those singers that give me goose bumps!! I blasted the volume on my T.V.! *laughing* I didn't want to miss a note! is he the guy who looks like jay leno? sorry I haven't been watching I work nights :-( Link to post Share on other sites
Author RealityCheck Posted May 25, 2006 Author Share Posted May 25, 2006 LNF.....*laughing* Sort of, but without the massive chin! Link to post Share on other sites
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