Nutha one of those "I like this friend" blah topics

[dt1973]

Ok so to save you the agony of a story heard a million times.. I'm diggin this chick, we friends, she's taken, I haven't expressed anything cuz she's taken, I maintain my dignity and just be a cool dude, I'm sure she thinks I'm totally awsome, I'm leavin it at that.

 

So now I'm just thinkin ok cool I got a friend.. but I gotta start lookin elsewhere. But somethin is telling me not to become TOO uninterested, because I do want her to know that I got some interest. I don't think her relationship w/ the guy is serious enough where I should totally count myself out. I feel like I should be in competitive mode with this guy.. and it's only cause I do feel I got a shot.. I don't feel in anyway like I'm less of a catch than he is, only he got there first. Simple as that. But still, I don't know what the hell she's thinking so maybe she has zero romantic interest in me. But, either way, I still feel I should be making my interest known.

 

But lately I been acting really like I have no interest. I talk about dating and stuff.. and I know I'm doing it in a way that makes it seem I really only wanna be friends w/ her.

 

So I'm wondering, let's say she was interested in me. Would my behavior make her think.. ok I guess he really isn't interested--I guess I'll just stick to this guy.. I seriously want to flirt w/ her and just be more like that, but I dunno it's just my personality or my ego or somethin.. as long as she's "taken" I can't get myself to be like that w/ her. I feel stupid. Like I feel like I'm degrading myself flirting with someone who's taken. I got too much pride I guess.. all I wanna do is find another girl who's not taken.. but then, I really really am feelin this girl here, despite the fact she's taken. I'll be honest, I'm not lookin for "advice on what to do" cause I do know how to handle this situaition. But, I'm lookin for an outside opinion, cause sometimes I think I know everything, but I really don't. Spanks!

[Guest]

if she thinks you're totally awesome then just keep on keeping on. How serious is her relationship? Well. She's not married. (right?) Now's for her, for you to explore what's going on.

 

you sound cool. But why, why, why do guys do things like about stuff that makes them sound like they just want to be friends?

 

However, I will say, that when you do stuff like talk about dating, you are doing a certain amount of self disclosure which is very attractive and a good way to let someone know what you're all about.

 

Flirt with her. It's not a crime to flirt with a girl with a boyfriend. It's not degrading, it's fun.

[dt1973]

Yah, I should be doin that.. jus havin fun..

 

It's just weird for me cause this one is more challenging and I'm not used to it. I don't know how to get it started w/ her. I am so non-chalont w/ her. I always felt like if I didn't act flirty with a girl in the first few days I never would. I'm sure u guys know about that phenomenon.