Too young to fall in love?

[atreyu3]

This question goes out to everyone on here that is more expierenced in the dating field. I posted about a week ago telling my story. I have been practicing NC for a week and it is very difficult for me. But my question to everyone is, am i too young to fall in love? I am 19 years old, been with one girl all through high school and through one semester off college and then it just felt lik we were married and she broke up with me, al though i thought it was what i wanted also... when she broke up with me i realized that it wasnt what i wanted and she really did try very hard in our relationship and i kinda just sat there didnt exactly take advantage of it, but didnt realize how good I really had it. Things seemed perfect with our parents getting along very well, our interests being similar and everyone on the outside always admired our relationship. She always wanted to be around me and was constantly telling me how much she loved me. We have been broken up for 5 months now and for the first 5 months i know i pushed her away a bit telling her how much i loved her all the time and that i missed her so much and basically begging to be with her. We got along very well right before school ended, the last week she slept over my apartment 3 days in a row and we hung out, didnt hook up, but she kinda slept on me so it was a little awkward. Then school ends and we didnt talk for a few days then i talked to her online through my talking to her first......so the NC is just starting to kick in.

 

Now a couple questions I have are:

 

1. Because of how young I am, are the chances greater that we will date again, or does it not make a difference.

 

2. Because we didnt have any other problems besides me not really putting alot of effort into the relationship, can we get back together and make it work......ps we only broke up one time in 3 years before this and it really wasnt even a breakup...we didnt officialy "date" for 2 months, but we hung out more than we ever did before and actualy got closes in those 2 months.

 

3. Am I just too young to fall in love?

 

Everyone that responds I will deeply appreciate the time u take to help me out, ive been pretty down in the dumps lately and this site does let me vent a bit.

[kitten chick]

Usually when one person leaves a relationship they leave for good. There are times though when second chances work. I don't think that anyone can say whether it will work for you guys. It's really up to her since you've told her you want to get back together.

 

IMHO, you're never too young to fall in love. I fell in love when I was very young and to this day I think that of all of the people I dated he's the one that I could still see myself marrying.

[GB111]

You're definitely not too young to fall in love. There is no age requirement (ok, other than the obvious). Having said that, you have so much to experience in your life, you might be limiting yourself somewhat. I'm sure she's a wonderful woman, but oh, how you're going to change over the next 10 years!

 

Most of the successful high school/college marriages I've heard of occur when the couple breaks up, stays in touch, then realizes later in life that they really love each other. You're in the middle of what will be some of the greatest years of your life. Make the most of them. Keep in touch with her and the right thing will happen at the end of the day.

 

Best of luck to you. I'm actually quite impressed with your maturity. Can't recall when I've read an adult questioning their own maturity. I think that, in and of itself, speaks volumes about you.

 

Regards,

 

GB

[Solachica]

Don't think you are too young to fall in love.

You know the problem to your break up was tht you didn't put effort into your relationship so try figuring out for yourself why this is so?

Are you not ready for a relationship? Or is it tht you got so comfortable in the relationship tht you thought it required no effort?

You guys broke up and she's still sleeping over at your place?

[atreyu3]

You guys broke up and she's still sleeping over at your place?

 

Well first I really want to thank everyone for responding you dont understand how much it really means to me just to read the opinions you have.

 

Second, no I dont believe I am too young to fall in love. I am just trying to find out what love really is I guess, we spent three years together, I know it could have worked if we were both a little more mature and realized we didn't have to hang out every single day with each other, we did miss out on alot because we were so consumed in ourselves. I still think about her everyday the same, and I know she thinks of me because she told me she thinks about going back all the time but she doesnt want this to ever happen again so she would want to be 100% sure it didn't. I guess I should be happy about that

 

Third ,I want to say that I think I fall into the second category you brought up, I defintly got to comfortable in the relationship and did not realize what I had.

 

And yes she did sleep over for three days in a row before school ended, we attended the same college if you didnt know, but we did not hookup yes she slept on me and I thought things were doing really well, but since school ended we dont even talk anymore so I guess I was wrong.

 

 

And you can pull my wings apart

And pin me down under glass

Until the end of days if it can help you

Discover that we share the same pain

I just hope you write your thesis

Before your subject is dead

[Solachica]

So when she stays over at your place wht do you guys talk abt??

Do you two just avoid talking abt your relationship and where you guys stand with each other?

[Brittanyjean06]

I fell In love at 14, but by the over all looks of that relationship, I can really sum it down to just infatuation.

 

You can be infatuated with someone for 2 years? but It still aches and still hurts..

 

But can high schoolers really fall in to true love? are they really matture enough to handel all those crazy feeligns? love at a young age is crazy, well for me it was and I am still really young ( 18 ).

 

is infatuation obsession? isn't true love supposed to be kind and gentle?

[atreyu3]

So when she stays over at your place wht do you guys talk abt??

Do you two just avoid talking about your relationship and where you guys stand with each other?

 

Well prior to her staying over we had a conversation and she told me she does miss a relationship, which was a big step because she was always telling me she didnt want a relationship and wanted to expierence new things.....so then she told me that she did miss our relationship and just wanted to make sure 100% that she wanted to go back out with me and this woudnt happen to us again because its too hard for her. She also told me she wanted to be my friend, but since school ended she has made no effort to contact me so why should I always have to make the effort to hang out? I know if i asked her she would say yes and we could hang out, but i realized it was too hard for me i coudnt just hang out as friends. When we did hang out we did alot of flirting and wrestling around with each other kinda cuddling while whatching movies and all that.....but since then ive been practicing NC....in a past thread i got good advice from someone saying if i really did love her then i should respect her decision and give her some space and see if she comes back on her own....since i blew it the previous months with all the begging

 

 

Brittany Jean......I woudnt call my feelings for my ex obsessive.....I dont stalk her I dont call her all the time...I just miss her alot and would like to be with her. I know I dont HAVE to be with her in order for my life to go on. My lifes not stopping because she will not date me right now, but at the same time i do wish we could be together. Considering we only broke up once and it wasnt even really a break up.... maybe i'll get that second chance sometime.

 

And you can pull my wings apart

And pin me down under glass

Until the end of days if it can help you

Discover that we share the same pain

I just hope you write your thesis

Before your subject is dead

[Solachica]

I think she's at a stage in her life tht she doesn't know wht she wants right now.

You two have been together for so long tht seeing herself as one instead of two..you and her... is kind of difficult so she comes back to you and then leaves again.

[atreyu3]

Yes, I think so too sola. I know she is very confused and needs to figure alot of things out. I left out some bits n pieces out of the story....as soon as we broke up her cousin died which she was close with, then her dad lost alot of money in the stock market, she became friends with her best friend from grammar school again and then she got sent to florida for rehab because she was doing heroine. Then her brother got in a bad accident and got hurt pretty badly and needed surgery. Then, recently her next door neighbor just died, and she just feels that everything bad is happening to her. Maybe some time apart can do us some good, and think about getting back together in due time......she really hasnt had the time to think about US with all the stuff happening to HER.

 

 

And you can pull my wings apart

And pin me down under glass

Until the end of days if it can help you

Discover that we share the same pain

I just hope you write your thesis

Before your subject is dead