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He wont commit but he wants to move in with me?


velvet

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So like I said we have been friends for ten years, intimate for over one year. Hes divorced but still going to court over it. He wont spend the night with me, and that is a sign of not wanting to commit. Im his buddy and he refers to me as his girlfriend to his family and friends. I told him if he didnt spend more time with me than I would see other people. His response "What days do you want". Like HELLO! What does that supposed to mean......We have the talk all the time. Im house hunting and he said that he would match me with the money I have saved so that he can move in with me. Does they guy have a clue? at all?......

 

I told him Im not putting out money to get in my house so I dont need any money from you. He seems to understand me he knows what I want from him is just time to have fun with him and love each other. Not marriage, or kids, just to have fun. He cant do that much. I told him I feel like Im just his insurance. So does he want to move in with me for me or to get out of his parents house. His wife kicked him out of his own and he can afford a place for himself, I dont know what his problem is. I would love for him to move in with me but not under the bull sh** conditions I have lived with for over a year. He says "The reason we have these time periods apart is because I love you and I just want to get you where I want you first". Where does he want me? Why does he want to move in with me if he cant already spend more than one or two days with me every other week?

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Hi -- I know you love this guy, but if he is as into you as you are him ... he would take the plunge of committing. I think that being friends for ten years makes this a special case, almost as if he feels that because of your strong friendship you will put up with anything. As you say, HELLO! You need to let him know that if his unacceptable behavior continues you will draw the line. He can't have freebies with no committment. You're letting yourself down and giving him a false sense of security - and he doesn't have to do the normal things a relationship requires.

 

Casual sex and seeing each other on HIS terms only relays the message that you are a "playmate" and he will continue to play until you raise his level of consciousness. Your self worth is important to him - so show him that you can stand up for yourself.

So like I said we have been friends for ten years, intimate for over one year. Hes divorced but still going to court over it. He wont spend the night with me, and that is a sign of not wanting to commit. Im his buddy and he refers to me as his girlfriend to his family and friends. I told him if he didnt spend more time with me than I would see other people. His response "What days do you want". Like HELLO! What does that supposed to mean......We have the talk all the time. Im house hunting and he said that he would match me with the money I have saved so that he can move in with me. Does they guy have a clue? at all?...... I told him Im not putting out money to get in my house so I dont need any money from you. He seems to understand me he knows what I want from him is just time to have fun with him and love each other. Not marriage, or kids, just to have fun. He cant do that much. I told him I feel like Im just his insurance. So does he want to move in with me for me or to get out of his parents house. His wife kicked him out of his own and he can afford a place for himself, I dont know what his problem is. I would love for him to move in with me but not under the bull sh** conditions I have lived with for over a year. He says "The reason we have these time periods apart is because I love you and I just want to get you where I want you first". Where does he want me? Why does he want to move in with me if he cant already spend more than one or two days with me every other week?
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