LA Girl Posted October 29, 2001 Share Posted October 29, 2001 I've been dating this guy for 3 1/2 years, and until the last 5 months been very happy. Last year he decided to pursue his golf dream, which is greatly admired but leaves me feeling like our relationship is going nowhere fast. Without getting into too many details, what should I expect from someone pursuing a dream. I'm supportive, however I need stability and after 3.5 years had hoped for a ring. We are very much in love -- so much that I'm feeling like I should let him go to pursue his dream so I won't be holding him back. He is living with me (and another roommate) at my place until Feburary when his next tournament begins. We've had serious talks of leaving each other because I don't want to be in a relationship where he is gone for 9 months out of the year. He just got back from a 5 month tournament and I only saw him twice, due to my job and responsibilities here. We spoke everyday and he did make a great effort in making me feel wanted and loved. Where do I draw the line? I don't want to lose this guy, but don't want to have a long distance relationship. We have discussed marriage and he says that all of his decisions have "us" in mind. Should I continue supporting this in hopes of achieving marriage some day or give up now? I'm stuck in between a rock and a hard spot. I do love this guy more than I've ever loved anyone. FYI -- he's 30 and I'm 28. I want to move towards a lifelong committment! Link to post Share on other sites
Tony T Posted October 29, 2001 Share Posted October 29, 2001 If you plan to have a life with this man, you will have to make major sacrifices that do not seem consistent with your overall desires for the future. Professional golf requires lots of practice and lots of travel away from home. Many woman are able to tolerate this lifestyle, many go along...others simply don't put up with it. You know what's ahead. You are clearly aware of the facts in this case. This man wants to be a golfer and while I am sure he has both of you in mind for his future, his idea of the future and yours are obviously very different. I have no idea why you posted this here. You are the only one who can decide if this is the lifestyle you want. Based on the information in your post, it is my feeling this is not something you want to endure. Go find a guy who likes to stay in reasonable range of home for his professional and leisure time. For additional information, you may want to contact the wives or girlfriends of professional golfers to see just how they have worked things out successfully. There may be some autobiographies of the more popular golfers in which this subject is dealt with. Good luck. Link to post Share on other sites
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