Separated With A 6-Month Daughter

[Taken4ARide]

Fellow brothers,

 

This is the first "separation" website I have visited on my quest for knowledge and understanding, much similar to what you have all experienced. I find it surprising, in the most unfortunate circumstance, just how many of us are out there. I truly feel for you; particularly you mysticflea.

 

Here is my story...

 

The last two weeks, mainly, have been a rollercoaster of emotions; as described in previous posts. The Sunday before last my wife and I had a domestic dispute over the most mediocre issues which she had been provoking me about during that weekend. I had retaliated after a heavy item was thrown at me, and she had ran and locked herself in the laundry to call the police.

 

During this time, I was sitting on the couch dumbfounded as I heard the final words of the conversation, “please come soon”. She had come out of the laundry armed with a broom. Anyone could tell you I would not hurt a fly; but given the circumstances, I was acting in self defence. She was over-reacting as per usual.

 

Shortly after the law was in her favour, coined as “the victim” and I was treated like an animal. Co-operatively I had been arrested and brought to the police station to wait in a glass cell, no bigger than 6 feet long, for 4 hours. I felt like Hannibal Lector.

 

I was charged with common assault and was given a two-week Apprehended Violence Order (AVO) to keep away from my wife; otherwise I would be arrested again.

 

Again, co-operating with the police, I was unable to even see my six-month old daughter (now two weeks), who had been peacefully sleeping in her room at the time of the incident.

 

Yesterday I had pleaded “not guilty” in court, and the case was adjourned until the following 2-3 months. The Police Prosecutor had told the court that my wife had gone back to the original place where I had met her; which is where her parents live; 5 hours from my city; and instructed them to extend the AVO.

 

Following this I had gone back to our place; two weeks after the incident; to discover a completely empty house. Everything had been taken. The house that we made a home occupied nothing but sunken marks in the carpet. My daughter’s nursery, which I had spent much time and love on was vacant.

 

I am currently staying with my parents until I find out what my next move is. I have not been able to stop crying and my personal life has become public knowledge at work, with family and with friends. Their support has been overwhelming.

 

Family, friends and work colleagues have come out of the woodwork to point out that my wife was a “loose cannon”, but had respected the fact I had loved, honoured and cherished her. They insist that it was premeditated.

 

My wife wants to separate from me for an unspecified time. She wants her distance and I told her that I want her to be happy, and to have the support which she requires. I told her that I was not going to chase after her, and the AVO was not required.

 

One moment I want to make things work, and the next I am out to toughen up and fight back.

 

Any suggestions would be most appreciated.