scarletletter Posted June 6, 2006 Share Posted June 6, 2006 NO reason to have a child. I actually run a nursing home and believe me, there are hundreds of residents there with plenty of children that never, ever come to visit them or even give a damn. To have a child is a personal choice and I can respect that decision in anyone. Doesn't mean they are "control freaks"...they just control their own body and their own mind...and what is wrong with that? Link to post Share on other sites
scarletletter Posted June 6, 2006 Share Posted June 6, 2006 What's the point of coming on this site, putting yourself out there and sharing embarassing and even despicable secrets, if people like you continue to throw it back at their faces. Very foul. What's wrong with kinky sex anyways? Give me a break...For God's sake, she is the one that thought it was demeaning and disrepectful...I just agreed with her. Wasn't throwing it in her face...she seems to get enough things thrown in her face. She was very disrespectful to the original poster who had a legitimate concern. I was merely reminding her of what a "control freak" actually is. I usually never have negative comments on here to anyone, but she struck a nerve. Link to post Share on other sites
RealityCheck Posted June 7, 2006 Share Posted June 7, 2006 Give me a break...For God's sake, she is the one that thought it was demeaning and disrepectful...I just agreed with her. Wasn't throwing it in her face...she seems to get enough things thrown in her face. She was very disrespectful to the original poster who had a legitimate concern. I was merely reminding her of what a "control freak" actually is. I usually never have negative comments on here to anyone, but she struck a nerve. HO-LY!!! Just read the last couple of pages of this thread. SL...I am totally with you! *slam dunk* You go girl! Link to post Share on other sites
scarletletter Posted June 7, 2006 Share Posted June 7, 2006 Thankyouverymuch!! I only come out with claws when someone provokes me...and I hate being that way. Fact is...the poor girl is made to feel bad cause she doesn't want children. I just cannot stand it when someone comes in here and stereotypes everyone from one simple statement of "I don't want kids"...what's the big f-ing deal? Link to post Share on other sites
HokeyReligions Posted June 7, 2006 Share Posted June 7, 2006 Why can't people accept the way I am too? Because they are stupid. Link to post Share on other sites
Sand&Water Posted June 7, 2006 Share Posted June 7, 2006 I am a woman who doesn't have children and never wanted to have children. My H feels the same way. Well if that's the case, then to each their own. I have nothing again you, or anyone who doesn't want children. Why don't you give away your ovaries? You're not using them, so it would be shame to let them go to waste. [unless you change your mind and decide to conceive later in life] Link to post Share on other sites
stillhere Posted June 7, 2006 Share Posted June 7, 2006 CCB brought all this on herself. She is obviously a bitter little girl, who spews venom at random, and it doesn't seem to matter who it's directed at. She can take her smart remarks elsewhere, because it's obvious she's looking for some attention. Link to post Share on other sites
RealityCheck Posted June 7, 2006 Share Posted June 7, 2006 Well if that's the case, then to each their own. I have nothing again you, or anyone who doesn't want children. Why don't you give away your ovaries? You're not using them, so it would be shame to let them go to waste. [unless you change your mind and decide to conceive later in life] Huh????.....WTF Give away her ovaries?????? You can't be serious!!!! Okay let's just let all that don't want to have babies go get roto-rootered, mangled and ......well ....what the heck...butchered!! PLEASE!!! Link to post Share on other sites
zarathustra Posted June 7, 2006 Share Posted June 7, 2006 Huh????.....WTF Give away her ovaries?????? You can't be serious!!!! Okay let's just let all that don't want to have babies go get roto-rootered, mangled and ......well ....what the heck...butchered!! PLEASE!!! Hey RC! Long time no see! I hear you! some people, eh? I can't help but laugh though... give away my ovaries?!?? I'm just wondering what some of these people who say these things do when they don't conceive? Mourn over the tampon they flush down the toilet as an egg went to waste? Or do you think they bury it in their back yard in a makeshift grave yard? Now I'm just being silly! Link to post Share on other sites
rossm Posted June 8, 2006 Share Posted June 8, 2006 I'm just wondering what some of these people who say these things do when they don't conceive? Mourn over the tampon they flush down the toilet as an egg went to waste? Or do you think they bury it in their back yard in a makeshift grave yard? OMG Link to post Share on other sites
RealityCheck Posted June 8, 2006 Share Posted June 8, 2006 OMG *laughing* Yes, our little Zara is precious isn't she!!!! Link to post Share on other sites
zarathustra Posted June 8, 2006 Share Posted June 8, 2006 *laughing* Yes, our little Zara is precious isn't she!!!! It got a little graphic, no? Can you imagine the rows of little crosses with RIP written in black crayon? I kinda hear a bugle playing in the background as I write this... Link to post Share on other sites
Author stillafool Posted June 8, 2006 Author Share Posted June 8, 2006 excuse me but I think my ovaries are good for more things than just having babies. I need the hormones don't I? OMG, you guys see what I mean! If you don't want babies just start donating your parts. Link to post Share on other sites
zarathustra Posted June 8, 2006 Share Posted June 8, 2006 excuse me but I think my ovaries are good for more things than just having babies. I need the hormones don't I? OMG, you guys see what I mean! If you don't want babies just start donating your parts. If you donate them, is the person who you donate it to going to pay for hormone treatment and if you choose to go au naturel, do you suppose that they will pay for your waxing service when you start needing to pluck the hair from your chin? Still, there are so many small minded people out there. Its amazing, but without them, how can we have fun with their ignorance? Link to post Share on other sites
MrsHellFire Posted June 8, 2006 Share Posted June 8, 2006 It's one thing to prove a point, but another for everyone to gang up on someone just cause they differed opinions and laugh about how she was abused by her husband wacking her in the face with his penis. There are people who hate kids and think people with kids are disgusting too, but I try to not take that stuff personally (afterall, likely you arenot going to change engrained ignorant attitudes- and there are thousands who probably think the same and it's a waste of time )and you shouldn't either. As to the op, I don't see the stigma in the first place. Unfortunately one probably gets more stigma for being a single mother than a childless woman. At least I felt that way after my first relationship went bust. Maybe it was just me. Fortunately for men, they never get any stigmas whether childless or not.. if they are a single dad, everyone adores them and finds them honorable, noble and attractive especially other women and even men. Heck It looked like even other men were obsessed with my ex. And If they are childless, nobody asks any questions and other men probably tell them they envy their free lifestyle (of course exceptions would be family like mama). Just be honest to your family and friends that you don't want kids and that's that. End of discussion. Don't be meek about it... and hopefully you'll never hear about it again. Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Posted June 8, 2006 Share Posted June 8, 2006 There is something very unnatural about women (and men) who do not want children and/or pets. I try to avoid them at all costs as they are usually control freaks. There is something very freakish and unnatural about people who choose internet names like cuddlycuddlebum. I try to avoid them at all costs as they are usually anal-retentive, judgemental fundie types. Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Posted June 8, 2006 Share Posted June 8, 2006 Well if that's the case, then to each their own. I have nothing again you, or anyone who doesn't want children. Why don't you give away your ovaries? You're not using them, so it would be shame to let them go to waste. [unless you change your mind and decide to conceive later in life] S & W Well, then you should give away your brain since you're not using it..... Link to post Share on other sites
PuppyDogEyes Posted June 9, 2006 Share Posted June 9, 2006 As to the op, I don't see the stigma in the first place. Unfortunately one probably gets more stigma for being a single mother than a childless woman. I wish I could say the same thing. But at 34, with no children and single, I can tell you that I feel it. Boy, do I ever. What irritates me is that I'm constantly being told "I'm lucky". "You're lucky you don't have children, you always have money to go out and do things, you don't have to worry about lots of bills like we do!" Umm, I don't? So my childless state exempts me from paying my electric bill, my telephone bill and my cable bill? Wow, I wish someone had told me that a long time ago, I could have saved for my next European vacation. It's a tradeoff. I don't have children and yes, I have a lot more "disposable income" - but at the end of the day I'm going to sleep in a cold, empty bed with no one to tell me "goodnight". Which would you rather have? It's all a matter of what you feel is important. In my case, I didn't feel that having children was all that important to me. And if I ever want to have a child of my own, instead of bringing yet another human being into this world, maybe I should do the responsible thing and adopt one that's already here and needs a loving home. Y'know? - pde. Link to post Share on other sites
a4a Posted June 9, 2006 Share Posted June 9, 2006 What irritates me is that I'm constantly being told "I'm lucky". "You're lucky you don't have children, you always have money to go out and do things, you don't have to worry about lots of bills like we do!" - pde. Just tell them how lucky they are to have dependents to write off on their taxes. And it is not a matter of luck it is a matter of choice not to have kids..... tell em to quit whining about their precious babies that they so wanted and that your tax dollars pay for their public education anyway. Link to post Share on other sites
HokeyReligions Posted June 9, 2006 Share Posted June 9, 2006 I wish I could say the same thing. But at 34, with no children and single, I can tell you that I feel it. Boy, do I ever. What irritates me is that I'm constantly being told "I'm lucky". "You're lucky you don't have children, you always have money to go out and do things, you don't have to worry about lots of bills like we do!" Umm, I don't? So my childless state exempts me from paying my electric bill, my telephone bill and my cable bill? Wow, I wish someone had told me that a long time ago, I could have saved for my next European vacation. - pde. Don't forget those school taxes we pay - whether or not we have childen. I've felt it too. People assume that because I don't have any children now that I've never had children. People with children will just dismiss 'childless people' from conversations because they can't relate - or the parents will *think* they can't relate. Or how many times have you heard "[if] or [When] you have children of your own, you'll understand" That one used to bug the heck out of me. What kind of parent would say someone was lucky for not having kids! Poor kid(s). Link to post Share on other sites
a4a Posted June 9, 2006 Share Posted June 9, 2006 I get nailed all the time for this crap. Last one babymaker that got on my case I said: When you are willing to pay for my kids, babysit them for free, and clean up after them, then pester me some more about me having kids. Until you decide to step up to the plate and do these things....... I don't want them. There is no room in my life for kids...... I already have enough fur and feather kids to share my love and home with. Link to post Share on other sites
ronnieromance Posted June 9, 2006 Share Posted June 9, 2006 I think so many of the things we are taught to value, equate with success, desire, consider normal etc. are f***ing retarded. Point blank, straight up stupid. People judging you on what you drive or the label on your jacket and completely ignoring or suger coating the fact that you suck at being a person. I want kids...later. Right now (and I know this isn't going to come out sounding good) I don't really like them. I'm sorry. Say good night to the bad guy. I don't find their cooing and drooling amusing or cute. I don't want anything I have to infantalize in order to communicate with and I need to be far to selfish and uncompromising in my goals to have one. Perhaps, if it were my own, I'd feel different. I picture myself as a parent down the road, so I know that written in my DNA is a change of heart. But I'll hang out with someone who's old enough to understand good natured sarcasm. My bosses son is here every day and he's great. Smart kid. I guess that's the stipulation. Sarcasm. LOL As for the original question, I, frankly, chalk a lot of that attitude up to religion's influence over the popular mindset and it's value system. Right now it's Akitas FTW. -R- Link to post Share on other sites
silktricks Posted June 9, 2006 Share Posted June 9, 2006 Well, I think that people who think that people who don't have kids are bad are bad. Sorry, I just had to say it. Link to post Share on other sites
alphamale Posted June 9, 2006 Share Posted June 9, 2006 Perhaps, if it were my own, I'd feel different. you would RR... Link to post Share on other sites
scarletletter Posted June 9, 2006 Share Posted June 9, 2006 I had my daughter when I was 30. I actually got pregnant on my wedding night....try telling that to family and friends and you can see them have the look in they eyes like..."yeah, right". But as bazaar as it sounds, it is true, thanks to some faulty birth control. I certainly wasn't ready for a child, even at 30. I had just gotten married, I wanted to travel and experience more things. I don't know what I would do without her now except that I might have a few less gray hairs. I only had the one, never wanted another. Now I get hell from my friends...Oh, she is an only child, she must be so lonely...or it is so sad to be an only child. So I can relate to the "no children" complex, because in a sense, I get it too because I chose to have only the one. People really need to mind their own business, that's the bottom line. My child is the most happy, gifted, and talented child in the world...(of course, she's mine!!) She is far from lonely or mistreated as an only child. When she asks why I didn't have any more children I always tell her..."I did it right the FIRST time so I didn't have to have anymore...I got a perfect child just as I wanted." That answer seems to please her. Link to post Share on other sites
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