Author ilmw Posted October 11, 2006 Author Share Posted October 11, 2006 Hi all, Well I have finally moved into my own place... nice 2 Bedroom apt... got a great deal... nice and big to... so the boys have room to goof off. Having the boys over tommorow night.. gonna make them some supper, and show them the place... I think the'll like my new 42" Plasma TV... Nice... been wanting one of these for 2 years... also got a great deal... Geessh I spent allot of money yesterday:eek: ... but its all good... been eating breakfast bars and water to save up:lmao: :lmao: The DW will be picking the boys up from here after work.. so she can get a gander at my Love Palace:lmao: ... just kidding... stuff is still in boxes.. but I cant be bothered to unpack anything else... ... I'm realy glad I went out and found this place... It truly is liberating to have your own place... In my entire life... I have never lived alone... It does feel kinda nice..... Last night I made myself supper for the first time since the end of August.. it felt great... awsome! Well all is good today... been friggen busy... which is great.... still need to keep busy... Well take care all ilmw Link to post Share on other sites
flowerpot Posted October 11, 2006 Share Posted October 11, 2006 Hey ilmw, Glad to hear things are going well for you. I know what it's like to eat cheap, macaroni& cheese W tuna it's not to bad. Protien & carbs. My oldest & her family have been staying at my place lately. I do enjoy thier company. This big old house is to quiet for just me. Take care , FP Link to post Share on other sites
dgiirl Posted October 11, 2006 Share Posted October 11, 2006 I'm realy glad I went out and found this place... It truly is liberating to have your own place... In my entire life... I have never lived alone... It does feel kinda nice..... Awww ilmw, I'm happy for you!! This is the first time I've ever lived alone too so I can totally relate to feeling liberated and empowered I should have done this a long time ago before getting married. What I wish i knew when I was younger lol Congratulations on your new place! And a plasma tv eh? Damn, I've been looking for one for a while now, but I cant seem to part with the money lol Soon tho, I'm going to have to do it! Whatcha get? Link to post Share on other sites
Author ilmw Posted October 11, 2006 Author Share Posted October 11, 2006 42" LG Plasma HDTV...blah blah Blah... Got it at Future Shop... chatted up the sales guy.. got the price down... $1300... not bad... got a cheapy lap top too... must work... cause hay ... I'm on love shack:laugh: The sales guy tried to upsale my to some expensive sumbsung?? Don't think that is how you spell it...anyway... the only difference was... the other model.. had an extra HDTV terminal... hmmm.... how hard is it to unplug something to plug in something else... :lmao: Anyway.... I LOVE MY TV:love: Hay Gunny...ilmtv... :laugh: Link to post Share on other sites
Gunny376 Posted October 12, 2006 Share Posted October 12, 2006 I know how to cook, the problem I ran into was cooking for one. Couple of solutions was "Men's Health" put out some cookbooks titled "A Man, A Can, and A Plan" and the classic "A Man, A Can, A Plan, and a Micorwave" Acutally some quick fix, easy to make recipes that any many can make. Another invaluabel piece of equipment was a Food Saver Vaccum Sealer. Not only can you cook as though you were still married, you can seal it, and you don't have to eat the same thing everyday. I cook once every two weeks. Plate off the rest, come home and nuke a plate, Bam! Or grab a plate and take to work with me and nuke it. It also allows you to buy the family paks, and shop at Sam's. Saves bookoo money. I'd also recommend the Express 101 and Pasta Express. I've got a great recipie for oppossum and armadilo (oppossum on a half shell) Remember if you can't stomach you're own cooking ~ Lousiana Hot Sauce is always your friend! :love: Get yourself a revolving disco ball chandellier and some neon glow posters, lava lamps, and blacklights. maybe some Penthouse and Playboy centerfolds on the wall and you're in business my man! Don't forget the puke lime green crushed velvet sectional couch! I bet that would impress the DW? :lmao: Link to post Share on other sites
Author ilmw Posted October 12, 2006 Author Share Posted October 12, 2006 I know how to cook, the problem I ran into was cooking for one. Couple of solutions was "Men's Health" put out some cookbooks titled "A Man, A Can, and A Plan" and the classic "A Man, A Can, A Plan, and a Micorwave" Acutally some quick fix, easy to make recipes that any many can make. Another invaluabel piece of equipment was a Food Saver Vaccum Sealer. Not only can you cook as though you were still married, you can seal it, and you don't have to eat the same thing everyday. I cook once every two weeks. Plate off the rest, come home and nuke a plate, Bam! Or grab a plate and take to work with me and nuke it. It also allows you to buy the family paks, and shop at Sam's. Saves bookoo money. I'd also recommend the Express 101 and Pasta Express. I've got a great recipie for oppossum and armadilo (oppossum on a half shell) Remember if you can't stomach you're own cooking ~ Lousiana Hot Sauce is always your friend! :love: Get yourself a revolving disco ball chandellier and some neon glow posters, lava lamps, and blacklights. maybe some Penthouse and Playboy centerfolds on the wall and you're in business my man! Don't forget the puke lime green crushed velvet sectional couch! I bet that would impress the DW? :lmao: Hay Guns... some great ideas there... Love the disco ball idea.... how about a round- revolving bed... with red satin sheets... Dw would think I was on crack... :lmao: BTW... the last couple of times we have talked on the phone... the conversations have been longer than the used to be... today she was talking about something that is no longer my concern.... but she asked my opinion on it.....? The other night we spoke for nearly 30 mins about her cell phone... ? Very relaxed conversations... she sounded happy to talk to me....? Once again... I don't read into this... but... it is a noticable change... in her communicating with me... No stiff and umcomfortable... more fluid.. and relaxed ... like it used to be... Oh well.... we shall see... Enjoying my place so not Get this... I love my new TV so much... I stayed up till almost 1am, because I did not want to turn it off:laugh: ilmw Link to post Share on other sites
dgiirl Posted October 12, 2006 Share Posted October 12, 2006 Oh well.... we shall see... Enjoying my place so not Get this... I love my new TV so much... I stayed up till almost 1am, because I did not want to turn it off:laugh: ilmw hahahah :lmao: that's reminding me of the commercial they're playing on the radio for best buy. The guy says he just broke up with his gf and wants to buy a new flat screen tv and the sales person asks how long they were together, the guy responses 8 years, and the sales person tells him he needs to add 2 inches for each year they were together. And the guy then corrects himself and says no 8.5 years lol Too funny. Link to post Share on other sites
Author ilmw Posted October 13, 2006 Author Share Posted October 13, 2006 hahahah :lmao: that's reminding me of the commercial they're playing on the radio for best buy. The guy says he just broke up with his gf and wants to buy a new flat screen tv and the sales person asks how long they were together, the guy responses 8 years, and the sales person tells him he needs to add 2 inches for each year they were together. And the guy then corrects himself and says no 8.5 years lol Too funny. Sounds like I did not get a big enough TV:mad: ...... :lmao: :lmao: !!! Dw picked up the little guy after she finished work.... She came in and told me she realy liked the apt... she also liked my TV... Geeeeezzz... It was hard... but I maintained a calm.. cool air... was very friendly. Offered her a cup of tea... whiched she declined... had one to many coffees today.. she apparently had a realy rough day at work. I know I can do this.... but... ahhhh..its hard! Back to work tommorow... get to be busy again... need it. ilmw Link to post Share on other sites
Gunny376 Posted October 13, 2006 Share Posted October 13, 2006 You Big Dummy!!! When she came in you should have rushed to the bedroom, slammed the door, and barred it with your body! And, then told her, "There's no one in here, HONEST!" Link to post Share on other sites
Author ilmw Posted October 13, 2006 Author Share Posted October 13, 2006 You Big Dummy!!! When she came in you should have rushed to the bedroom, slammed the door, and barred it with your body! And, then told her, "There's no one in here, HONEST!" :lmao: :lmao: .... that was too funny... only problem with it was... my little guy was with me... and if asked...he would rat me out for half an piece of gum.. The little guy is so easy to please... "there is no one here mom"... That just reminded me... she did have a good look around the place Link to post Share on other sites
Author ilmw Posted October 17, 2006 Author Share Posted October 17, 2006 Been busy with work....too tired to play:p All the silly people came out at the same time...now no time off:eek: Working straight through.....ZZZZZZ...k awake now... I'll play later ilmw Link to post Share on other sites
Author ilmw Posted October 17, 2006 Author Share Posted October 17, 2006 Been busy with work....too tired to play:p All the silly people came out at the same time...now no time off:eek: Working straight through.....ZZZZZZ...k awake now... I'll play later ilmw Link to post Share on other sites
Author ilmw Posted October 18, 2006 Author Share Posted October 18, 2006 Hi all, Must have been tired last night.. posted twice the same thing:laugh: Well..I have been realy busy at work this past week or so.. Haven't seen the boys at all since last weekend... but talk to them pretty much every night.... Once I know what is happing with my transfer... found out yesterday.... I head back out on the road end of the month... but it looks like my schedule will be changing.... so I have to wait and then go see DW about proper schedule for visitation... That will be nice to have set up finally.. so I can have some what of a normal life all considering:) Something I have noticed and it has been happining on a more frequent basis.. My DW has been forwarding me email jokes and the like... I'm in with all kinds of other people.. her friends, family etc. The thing is... after she said she wanted out... she stopped ALL emails to me... and I mean ALL.. nadda... I even got one at work on the 16th... That is New. As I had only been getting them at my home email. I started getting the emails just before I went on my little putter through the US... back in September.....hmmm? In one email... I was one of only 5 people... and it was a list of all her best friends???? I would not have posted this... but for me... It is a noticable change... a 180'... Oh well... we shall see:) ilmw Link to post Share on other sites
Author ilmw Posted October 21, 2006 Author Share Posted October 21, 2006 Well here I am at work again... Anyway... Something just dawned on me as I was giving my 2 cents to another member... something about myself... I have found that I am 90% of the time in a peacful frame of mind... and I find it amazing that I fell like this.... Pondering this... I came up with the following conclusion:cool: All my adult life.. I have been angry... there was always something to be pissed off about... One thing after another... and I never seemed to let it go... it built up and built up... In my last LTR I let myself be treated like crap... and decided I would never let this happen again... now enters my DW.... I guess in the early days... I came across as distant... contained.. controled of my emotions... she fell in love with me anyway... Through our time together... all that anger was still inside of me... Now compounded with my job.. and family life... I guess I lost control of the ability to contain it any longer... it was unhealthy place to be... but it was were I was at.... It helped to poisen our relationship... etc I realise now how much of this anger...... is gone...washed away.. fizziled out... It just doesn't matter anymore..... I have mentioned before how I have felt a huge weight off my shoulders... and I put this down to... coming to terms with this crap.... Seeing it for what it was.... Getting worked up over stuff I had no contol over. I hear others complaining now...getting angry at stuff.... and I find myself...not getting dragged into the negativism... I have even talked some people down... Wow that is a change:lmao: I'd used to be the one to fuel the fire.... I am not the most religious guy in the world... but I find myself.. well walking with grace... smiling at the sun.. wanting to help others more.... the walls have come down... not so defensive our gaurded... I realy have opened up. It also turns out that 4 other people in the past 6 weeks have ended the marriages... at work alone. Unbelievable.. Just read over this and it sounds like I am looking for a pat on the head... ...No I am not... but it felt good recognising the actual/ real changes in myself... hay I dig me now... :lmao: I think I'm gonna take me on a date:D Link to post Share on other sites
PWSX3 Posted October 21, 2006 Share Posted October 21, 2006 Yes you do deserve a pat on the head. Anytime we can learn and improve ourselve we have done a good thing. Yes it is good to share these things because for the others that are still working or stuggling with these issues they can also learn it is possible, I for one am learning from you and the othes, I'm just a little behind in the classwork. I feel when you are happy with yourself it will show to the others ( I am learning this in my own life now) that are around you and when they see it then they show the same emotion towards you in return. Sure not all people will because some of the people are still in that frame of mind we used to be in, stressed, pissed at the world, etc. and those people you just have to say; I'm sorry they are like I used to be and they don't understand. Like my grandpa used to always say; you are never to old to learn (and I'll add better yourself) and the day I quit learning is the day they nail the top on my coffen. He passed away at 102 so I guess I have a lot more learning I can do if I want to. Link to post Share on other sites
Gunny376 Posted October 21, 2006 Share Posted October 21, 2006 I can so relate to your latest post! Letting go, falling backwards, trusting, feeling free. Less is more! I got so wrapped up in "Go! Go! Go! Move! Move! Move!" In your best is never good enough! Work harder, strive harder, do more! Everyday was a test, and your best of yesterday, isn't good enough for today!" Once I removed myself from the rat race, and got out of the competition ~ life got a lot easier. Less stressful. I'm not where I want nor need to be in life, but I'm the one that's defining where and what that is now, and the pace. I use to walk around PO all the time, mad at the World and everyone in it. Now, I'm Joe Cool on Campus ~ and I'm never going to let anyone steal that away from me. Not even myself. I've heard people say it to me all my life, so have you ~ "Just chill!" No matter what happens ~ its going to be alright. When you think about it ~ and give it some thought, you've really only two things to worry about. Wheather your healthy or sick. If you're healthy, you've got nothing to worry about. If you're sick, you've only got two things to worry about ~ wheather you're going to live or die? If you live you've got nothing to worry about, but if you die, you've only got two things to worry about ~ wheather you're going to Heaven or Hell. If you go to Heaven ~ you've got nothing to worry about. And, if you go to Hell, it won't matter because you'll be so busy saying "Hi!" to all of your friends it won't matter! I use to work as a production supervisor at a manufactoring plant that employeed the "dregs" of society to include "work-release" inmates from prison. I learned a lot from those guys, one being that if you've got your health, your strength, and your freedom you're good to go. Everything else is relative. Side-note! I asked one of the older inmates (50's), if the "thugs" and "gang-bangers" inmates ever messed with the olderinmates? He told me, "No! They respect us, and answer us with respect, calling us "Sir" They know we're older, and give out of breath quicker, and know that we know we're going to have to take them out the game within the first minute or two!" Things that make you go "Hummmmmm?" Link to post Share on other sites
Author ilmw Posted October 21, 2006 Author Share Posted October 21, 2006 I can so relate to your latest post! Letting go, falling backwards, trusting, feeling free. Less is more! I got so wrapped up in "Go! Go! Go! Move! Move! Move!" In your best is never good enough! Work harder, strive harder, do more! Everyday was a test, and your best of yesterday, isn't good enough for today!" Once I removed myself from the rat race, and got out of the competition ~ life got a lot easier. Less stressful. I'm not where I want nor need to be in life, but I'm the one that's defining where and what that is now, and the pace. I use to walk around PO all the time, mad at the World and everyone in it. Now, I'm Joe Cool on Campus ~ and I'm never going to let anyone steal that away from me. Not even myself. I've heard people say it to me all my life, so have you ~ "Just chill!" No matter what happens ~ its going to be alright. When you think about it ~ and give it some thought, you've really only two things to worry about. Wheather your healthy or sick. If you're healthy, you've got nothing to worry about. If you're sick, you've only got two things to worry about ~ wheather you're going to live or die? If you live you've got nothing to worry about, but if you die, you've only got two things to worry about ~ wheather you're going to Heaven or Hell. If you go to Heaven ~ you've got nothing to worry about. And, if you go to Hell, it won't matter because you'll be so busy saying "Hi!" to all of your friends it won't matter! I use to work as a production supervisor at a manufactoring plant that employeed the "dregs" of society to include "work-release" inmates from prison. I learned a lot from those guys, one being that if you've got your health, your strength, and your freedom you're good to go. Everything else is relative. Side-note! I asked one of the older inmates (50's), if the "thugs" and "gang-bangers" inmates ever messed with the olderinmates? He told me, "No! They respect us, and answer us with respect, calling us "Sir" They know we're older, and give out of breath quicker, and know that we know we're going to have to take them out the game within the first minute or two!" Things that make you go "Hummmmmm?" Its amazing how we (all of us) can read each other's post... and Bam.. you realise something... wow..I never thought of it like that or that way.. Its happened twice today.. and I am meant to be working... Computer system is down.. only Inet access...hurrayyy! As for the lower dregs of socitey... yup.. I tend to deal with the worst 2% of society.. and because of that... I used to clump everyone else in there too... Not fair.. I know...but that is the way it became... Not no more.... (I speak right proper english eh?) I have found by giving others.. a chance..that I can learn allot from others.. as we all have a story... and we all seen things from a different perspective.... I am not so High and Mighty anymore... Awsome break down on what to worry about... and your right about some of my friends:lmao: :lmao: .. Gosh I'll miss in the after life:laugh: Later dude:cool: Link to post Share on other sites
dgiirl Posted October 21, 2006 Share Posted October 21, 2006 ilmw, please dont ever feel bad and like you're trying to pat yourself on the back. Like p said, even during your highs, it's important to post about them so other's can see. I know for me, in the beginning, i drew strength from the good posts. Where people were able to say life was good and it was going to be ok. It gave me faith to hold on. Also, I know what you mean about being more sensitive to others negativity. I see my friends who are in long term relationships, speaking to each other the same way my exh and I did, and I constantly ask myself how come they are still together? Why do people give so much importance to such trivial things. I was angry for a really long time, and so caught up in the rat race. Have to work hard for this and that and that. Then all of a sudden, every single thing that I was working for was taken away from me. I had to rebuild my life and start over. I've been having a few bad days, and woke up this morning and realized I have no direction in my life. Yes, my life is good. I have a nice appartment, I'm decorating it the way I want, I'm a lot more independent, I'm closer to friends, I have SO many things going for me, yet I have no direction at all. Everything that I thought was important, is no longer important. I woke up realizing I still have not let go. Yes, the xh is still an asshat, and I'm not really pining for him, but I still have not let go of my past dreams. I feel like the little boy and the dam. The dam sprung a leak, and the little boy puts his finger into it. I'm doing that right now. Who cares where the cork went, just let's prevent the whole thing from tumbling down. I have that under control, but now I feel like in order to move on, I truely have to let go of everything that I dreamed about. I feel numb. Link to post Share on other sites
PWSX3 Posted October 21, 2006 Share Posted October 21, 2006 It is still good to hear the thoughts from the old timers on here such as dgiirl, Gunny and many others. It just shows me (a beginner) that even though they have come a LONG WAYS that you still get knocked back once in a while but the thing I see is it is easy for them to get back to the focus they need and it doesn't take long and they are back on the right track, in a good mood again and are able to tell there story to show us this is a LIFE CHANGE and we will have to work on it tomorrow, the next day, the next 5 years and the 50 after that. To me I am also greatful for all the support and help I have gotten from people here on this site that you don't even know, we may never meet in person and be able to shake there hand, but everyone is welling to share a big part of there life that to some are so personal they would never share with there close friends but they share here in order for others to learn and grow. Link to post Share on other sites
Author ilmw Posted October 21, 2006 Author Share Posted October 21, 2006 ilmw, please dont ever feel bad and like you're trying to pat yourself on the back. Like p said, even during your highs, it's important to post about them so other's can see. I know for me, in the beginning, i drew strength from the good posts. Where people were able to say life was good and it was going to be ok. It gave me faith to hold on. Also, I know what you mean about being more sensitive to others negativity. I see my friends who are in long term relationships, speaking to each other the same way my exh and I did, and I constantly ask myself how come they are still together? Why do people give so much importance to such trivial things. I was angry for a really long time, and so caught up in the rat race. Have to work hard for this and that and that. Then all of a sudden, every single thing that I was working for was taken away from me. I had to rebuild my life and start over. I've been having a few bad days, and woke up this morning and realized I have no direction in my life. Yes, my life is good. I have a nice appartment, I'm decorating it the way I want, I'm a lot more independent, I'm closer to friends, I have SO many things going for me, yet I have no direction at all. Everything that I thought was important, is no longer important. I woke up realizing I still have not let go. Yes, the xh is still an asshat, and I'm not really pining for him, but I still have not let go of my past dreams. I feel like the little boy and the dam. The dam sprung a leak, and the little boy puts his finger into it. I'm doing that right now. Who cares where the cork went, just let's prevent the whole thing from tumbling down. I have that under control, but now I feel like in order to move on, I truely have to let go of everything that I dreamed about. I feel numb. Thx dgiirl.. That was insightful as always:) ... I can see how you could feel numb... after losing all of what you had dream would be.... I can kinda relate:o ... Your are right as well about posting the positve... I too have read other's positive posts.. and it has uplifted me.. helped me see... that there can and will be brighter days.... If I can do that for one person... then that is great... Have a great weekend..and don't melt your igloo..with turning up the heat...Its getting chilly this days eh? Link to post Share on other sites
dgiirl Posted October 21, 2006 Share Posted October 21, 2006 Have a great weekend..and don't melt your igloo..with turning up the heat...Its getting chilly this days eh? Thank you!! You too And yah it's getting cold. What happen to summer? btw, how can you be on the computer while at work? I was under the impression you were one of those good looking guys in blue I always see on the street but am to embarassed to talk to Link to post Share on other sites
Author ilmw Posted October 21, 2006 Author Share Posted October 21, 2006 Thank you!! You too And yah it's getting cold. What happen to summer? btw, how can you be on the computer while at work? I was under the impression you were one of those good looking guys in blue I always see on the street but am to embarassed to talk to Hahahah:lmao: ...never be embarrsed to talk to your friendly neighbourhood policeman:) .... besides...we all like it when the ladies get the "blue flu" :laugh: I'm a 'D'... Detective:cool: We do allot of puter work/paper work... when it works:p But if it makes you feel better... I am back on the road in uniform end of the month... my time is up in the office... and I get to push the tax payers taxi around again:laugh: Link to post Share on other sites
dgiirl Posted October 21, 2006 Share Posted October 21, 2006 "blue flu" lol that's too funny I wonder what the term is for firemen? Maybe I can help with your computer problems if you can introduce me to a few good single men in blue? Fair trade? lol Link to post Share on other sites
CryingCanuck Posted October 22, 2006 Share Posted October 22, 2006 First she sweets talks the cops, then she's asking all kinds of perculiar questions about firemen what's next Stuff about Customs Officers HEHE Hey D glad to see you back................. Link to post Share on other sites
dgiirl Posted October 22, 2006 Share Posted October 22, 2006 I ask about the firemen cos I got to see 3 trucks come to my apartment building yesterday. But thanks for reminding me CC... my last drive into the states on the quebec border... there was a girl at the gate, and i guess she didnt like my answers so she made me go in for "questioning", but oh la la mon dieu... i thought i went to heaven. All these REALLY cute guards were all standing around inside the office and asking me personal questions like my nationality, where I live, where i went to school, where i worked... i was hoping they were hitting on me and would ask for my number, but atlas they did not lol Link to post Share on other sites
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