He gives me mixed signals, I need a MAN's thoughts... or any from anyone is good!

[MonkeyBrainzz]

Hi all, thanks for taking the time to read this. I had met a man at work a little over a year ago. Throughout the time we've known each other, we've gotten to know each other a little better.

 

I know that he has some sort of interest in me because he's given me all the right signals and he's even asked me out for a drink. He gives me compliments, gives me "the look" with his eyes. He hasn't ever really came out and confessed that he's interested, but his eyes give it away. He pays much attention to me, his face brightens up a room as soon as he sees me. He comes right to me when i am around. When he hasn't heard from me in a while he will email me to see what's up.

 

He is a show off... he's always quick to tell me that he just bought a boat or that he's remodeling his house or that he got a new truck... which are all true. I don't think he has lied to me about anything. I know that he even has children. So I know he's at least trying to impress me.

 

We email each other all the time. He knows that I am interested in him. I've told him straight out.

 

The thing that boggles my mind is that whenever I tell him about a dream I had about him or if I get really flirtatious over our emails... he NEVER replies back, or if he does, he doesn't let me know that he's aknowledged the fact that I just told him he was gorgeous or that I had an awesome dream about him. WHY IS THAT??? Does that mean I am supposed to back off and quit with the compliments??? I am confused with this. He gives me all the right signals but when it comes to me 'trying' to give him a sort of 'sexual' or even a passionate email he ignores it. But he replies back to all my other emails. We'll even have long conversations throughout the day over email, but once I bring up anything like a dream I had, he doesn't reply back. I've told him before that if he didn't want me to email him anymore that he should tell me to stop.... he hasn't told me to stop, is he shy to have me open up to him passionately??? Or do you think he just wants a friendship???

 

I have friendships with many men and there isn't this much chemistry. I have lots of sexual chemistry and sexual temptations with him and I feel the same vibes from him as well. He even tells me to stop in and see him at work... he always brings up going out for drinks. Although we haven't gone out for drinks yet... whenever i try to set a date with him.... it ends up that he's "busy" that night and can't so he says "Don't worry, we'll figure something out".

 

I am confused! Can I get some good input from a MAN'S point of view as to why he is sort of stand offish when I become a little more for him. Otherwise, if he's just wasting my time, then I would like to move on... do you think he's wasting my time? Why would he ask me out for drinks if he's always "busy"... please note that HE is the one to initiate going out for drinks... he was the one to think that up first.

 

Please help! : (

[elijahBailey]

Otherwise, if he's just wasting my time, then I would like to move on... do you think he's wasting my time? (

 

of course, he's married

 

now, on to his psyche. Me thinks...

1. he doesn't have to balls to go further

2. he needs an ego booster (aka.. 'you')

[MonkeyBrainzz]

of course, he's married

 

now, on to his psyche. Me thinks...

1. he doesn't have to balls to go further

2. he needs an ego booster (aka.. 'you')

 

How do you know if he's married? He hasn't told me he's married. I haven't heard from anyone that he is... do you think this is the reason he strings me along? Cuz when there hasn't been any contact with him in a long time... he is soooo happy to hear from me and see me.

 

I'm not sure anymore... I am young but getting old enough to settle down... I'm 25 and I am not getting any younger. I just want to know if he's really interested or if I am wasting my time with him... if he's married, then he's a big jerk for doing this to his wife and to me. How lame...!

[j.carsey]

Sounds to me that he likes you well enough but there is something else holding him back from crossing the line... whether it's another girlfriend/wife or he just isn't ready to dive into this kind of stuff after recently getting hurt. It also could be that the current situation has some other complications that you just don't know about.

 

Did you ask him why he doesn't want to go further?

[notmakingsense]

That's what jumped out to me also -- that he has another gf or is married. Do you have his cell #? -- try to see if you notice patterns when he'll answer and when he won't. Other than snooping to find out (which I personally wouldn't bother with), I'd just ask him outright and tell him that he seems like he's avoiding actually going on a date.

[elijahBailey]

How do you know if he's married? He hasn't told me he's married.

 

Just a hunch. You did say he's got kids. And from his behavior, chances are good that he is. And if he really is, he wouldn't tell you outright.

 

He's sending you the right signals, and most dudes would go all the way if the girl gives him the signals too (which you already have).

[Hitman10000]

He could be married/girlfriend/gay/dating someone else/scared to date within the company. He is holding back, let me tell you the truth. If a Guy wants to get it on with a girl, he doesn't hold back, the only thing holding him back could be the above reasons. He probably sees you as an "option" for the reason why he asks you out for drinks, he's definetely got another girl in the picture that you don't know about. Because you work with him, being confrontive about asking about his status or feelings towards you may be standoffish, it's up to you to decide whether you want to take that irsk or not.

[MonkeyBrainzz]

He could be married/girlfriend/gay/dating someone else/scared to date within the company. He is holding back, let me tell you the truth. If a Guy wants to get it on with a girl, he doesn't hold back, the only thing holding him back could be the above reasons. He probably sees you as an "option" for the reason why he asks you out for drinks, he's definetely got another girl in the picture that you don't know about. Because you work with him, being confrontive about asking about his status or feelings towards you may be standoffish, it's up to you to decide whether you want to take that irsk or not.

 

Yes, I truly have to agree with you all that he has someone he's attached to... otherwise he would totally love it when I try to seduce him. Another point to all of this is I am 25 and he's 33... he has totally taken advantage of me! Why do I always get stuck with jerks like this? Why did he have to 'lure' me into wanting him. I feel so sick now!

 

I really liked him! He seemed so nice! He always always always smiles so bright when i see him... I can't believe this!

 

If he's married/attached... and I don't know about it... why did he take things THIS far even? If somethings holding him back, why did he ask me out to begin with? I don't understand men at all. I just got out of an 8 year relationship... I don't need this drama. Was this his way of 'luring' me into the jig and once I try to bite it he just toys with me? And once he would have his way with me... then he'd throw me back into the river? Why are some men like this? They are so cruel... to the ones they love and to others they don't even know.

[nightcrawler]

Yeah im that situation too except its not a dude its with a girl.

and that yeah now im really messed because she chilling with someone else. Read the post in search of under mixed singal or going confused