What To Di If She Dumps You

[RealBroken]

Do u think these methods can work if they're now with someone else?

Im trying so hard to get over her, i just wish i could forget and be none the wiser of her existince..... its not workin, im tryin. ) :

 

I found out for sure the other day that she did hook up with a guy straight after me,.... even though she was so upset and in tears when breakin up,.... she ended up with the guy she met while we were going thru the rough patch, whether it was her plan in the end i dunno. She's told me not to contact her again.

 

I got so pissed when i found out for sure that shes with him after all we went thru and what WE were......... i decided I want my stuff back from her NOW. Its a memory course and a book,... all i could think of is her letting him use it.

 

Anyway, i emailed her after 5 weeks of NC. Its said this;

 

XXXXXX

Could i please have my course and book back, i need it back now.

You can either post it to XXXXX or could you leave it some where in XXXXX (my hometown) for me to collect

Realbroken.

 

I haven't put anything emotive in there at all. Its not angry sounding but its not "i miss u sounding" either. Probably not what she's expecting.

 

I'm kinda dreading a horrible message back. She's not the type to do it,.... but she surprised me on the breakup and how horrible she was then. I think i would be happy with no reply what so ever and the stuff just turning up.

I guess a "yeah sure ok,.... how are you?" is too much to expect huh.

Could only lead to dissappointment.

I get a sick feeling everytime my inbox shows a new email.

 

I hate this, i really want to be over her,... but my love just wont die and im hating it. i feel weak and dont wanna be.

[donpepot]

dude if your doing everything right..the only thing you should do is to unticipate...

 

LET YOUR ANTICIPATION TO SIMER..

 

For now use or your emotion to bettering yourself..so next time you meet up with her..

youll be more attracrive..

 

Be patient...I have an ex contact me after 6months she said she is sorry and what to give it another try..but im seeing som1 else on that time so i did not persue sny further..

 

dude if you want good results...just do my advices for you 100 percent with no questioning..study it carefully..its all there..it work to me.it work to them...and why should you be exempted..

[RealBroken]

Yup, thanks DONDEPOT,

 

Your advice is all I can do. I just need to be patient. And I will better myself for sure. hey, ive gone out, got a new job, bought an expensive new wardrobe so i look good, going to gym again and gettin more buff, started tarining my sport again, got a good haircut, lookin good etc etc.

 

That email was ok to send though eh? No emotion, and give my stuff back.

 

If she wants her stuff back, she can just ask, but she's prob too afraid. Hey, Im not and I want it back. the balls in her court.

[donpepot]

on my experiences and observations..a girl may want to come back again when she is ready and once you let go...

[Pink Amulet]

Although, the more time goes on, the less likely. Although there might be hope in the transitional stage between "I really don't want to be with him" stage and "what was his name again?".

[RealBroken]

Although, the more time goes on, the less likely. Although there might be hope in the transitional stage between "I really don't want to be with him" stage and "what was his name again?".

 

EXACTLY; thats why I want the door to be open. Its why i need to show her no hard feelings and be friendly while not over steppin the mark.

She is a WUSS and not a brave soul.

She would probably be frightened to talk to me, because of what i may think of her. I dunno if she'd have the guts even if she did want to come back.

Thats why I wanna connect,...... gentle

 

I believe that maybe part of why she said dont contact me...... she was feelin horrible, didnt want me to see what she had done.... i dunno. She didnt want to be in that situation of hurting somebody..... but unfortunately made it worse by lying and being like that.

 

Its just how, thats the hard part. the balls in my court, she's replie with where shall i send the stuff. She doesnt know where i live now.

[Pink Amulet]

Okay realbroken, I think you need to get her off your mind. Every post you make references to her. Do you really think she is obsessing this much?! You need to go out and do some fun things and stop worrying about if she is going to come back to you, and how to manipulate her to do so!!!

[Diver012]

A story I heard that I would like to share...

 

A couple dated for about 6 months then seperated. I dont know the details of the seperation nor do I think they are important to the moral of this story...

 

Both people went there seperate ways and entered into other relationships. A year and a half later, they got back together and have now been married for 10 years and still going strong.

 

Another story...

 

An old friend of mine was divorced from his Ex-Wife. She cheated on him and left him for another man. He went on with his life and married someone else. Years later, his new wife did the same thing to him. A few years later, believe it or not, his first Ex and him made up and they are now remarried.

 

The moral of the story is.. People change. People grow in different directions sometimes and relationships, and marriages end. Its a tragetry each time a love ends.

 

Sometimes they come back, sometimes they dont. I get concerned when I see people stuck in the past. I used to dwell on things that were out of my control, until I learned to just let that crap go.

 

Dude she might come back she might not. I honestly wish you happiness and hope everything works out the way you want it to. I personally think that it would be wise to keep in teh back of your mind, that she may not return.. ever.

 

Just my opinion..

[RealBroken]

I'm sorry if its gettin to you.

 

ive been with alot of people before.....

 

But this one is worth it. We broke up under circumstances that could have been helped, but because of timing things went downhill. I'm trying to do other things, but for some reason his one wont leave my mind. I cant help but love her and i wont find like her again, she was so unique.

[Pink Amulet]

 

Dude she might come back she might not. I honestly wish you happiness and hope everything works out the way you want it to. I personally think that it would be wise to keep in teh back of your mind, that she may not return.. ever.

 

Realbroken, read this. Over and over again. I am sure she was lovely, but I was lovely to my ex too and I am never ever going back to him. If she doesn't love you anymore, and she doesn't want to be with you then so be it. There is nothing you can do about that. No matter how perfect she was, why would you still want to be with someone who walked away from you?

[imperialpilotx]

my advice from what I have learned in lets see.. the last week ?

 

whatever you did wrong, make the change to better yourself. no one else.

 

this way you will be ready for your next love, you will be better independent, more confident, more attractive.

 

Anyone on here can tell you too, if a "girl" ( i say girl, because women arent so fickle) breaks up with you... they hate begging.

 

They also hate to see when youre doing better and have more confidence and have made certain changes.. they hate it in a "good way". like they get jealous they threw you away.

 

When you have collected all of your thoughts, and have become more accepting, and a better person to yourself pack up your s*** and move on. Only when youre ready though. If your love comes back, i guess it is all dependent on where both of your hearts are, and if you guys want to make it work again. There is nothing wrong with that. Its your body and mind. ( holy run-on sentences)

 

doing things like rebound relationships, rebound sex, is WRONG. just remember that.

 

 

for example, I try to stay away from home and go out with friends, being able to stand up again. Yesterday i spent the whole day detailing my car, and it kept me busy, and made me happy because cars is one of my hobbys.

 

Love is always out there It comes in odd ways in weird forms, from any direction when you least expect it.

[rkman]

A story I heard that I would like to share...

 

A couple dated for about 6 months then seperated. I dont know the details of the seperation nor do I think they are important to the moral of this story...

 

Both people went there seperate ways and entered into other relationships. A year and a half later, they got back together and have now been married for 10 years and still going strong.

 

Another story...

 

An old friend of mine was divorced from his Ex-Wife. She cheated on him and left him for another man. He went on with his life and married someone else. Years later, his new wife did the same thing to him. A few years later, believe it or not, his first Ex and him made up and they are now remarried.

 

The moral of the story is.. People change. People grow in different directions sometimes and relationships, and marriages end. Its a tragetry each time a love ends.

 

Sometimes they come back, sometimes they dont. I get concerned when I see people stuck in the past. I used to dwell on things that were out of my control, until I learned to just let that crap go.

 

Dude she might come back she might not. I honestly wish you happiness and hope everything works out the way you want it to. I personally think that it would be wise to keep in teh back of your mind, that she may not return.. ever.

 

Just my opinion..

 

My parents did the same thing after 3 years of dating. 6 months later they were together, a couple years later they had my oldest brother. Neither one did anything to manipulate the other into coming back. They didn't play these stupid games that this thread is all about, they just were themselves. As were other friends of theirs and mine who went through similar things. If you want be a kid, play these games, you'll end up hurting others and yourself. If you want to be responsible, then make responsible decisions, becuase every choice you make has cascading effects on everyone around you.

 

The whole point is that; If you have to manipulate a situation, yourself and other people, you will enver know whether both parties truly love each other. If you really want to have love and happiness in your life let her go completely. Push her out of your life, forget about her, fall out of love with her, because IF her or someone like her ever enters your life again, it has to be a positive begining. Count on the fact that you just going to be friends, if that at all. In order to do that, you both need to completely forget each other for a long while.

 

There's a chinese proverb which states something along the lines; Sometimes love leaves, but true love comes back.

 

What you do with that is up to you. The fact is that if you are obsessing, then you aren't loving her. Think about it logically...now start thinking about yourself. A friend is a gift you give to yourself, not something which you beg for.

[rkman]

 

When you have collected all of your thoughts, and have become more accepting, and a better person to yourself pack up your s*** and move on. Only when youre ready though. If your love comes back, i guess it is all dependent on where both of your hearts are, and if you guys want to make it work again. There is nothing wrong with that. Its your body and mind. ( holy run-on sentences)

 

Best advice you will hear in your entire life.

 

When it's all over, the relationship is about you. How can you be a better person? How can you find a better person? What did you do wrong to her and to yourself? What did she do wrong to you and herself? What traps won't I let myself fall into? How can I be stronger for the people around me?

 

Only when you figure all of this out will you be ready to give yourself completely to another human being.

[JDREW311]

true people want what they can't have but this is all games. if you have to play a game to win someone back the challenge will be over once they win you back. mature adults don't play games like these. once you get over 30 you'll realize sooner or later that true love doesn't follow the bait and switch game. when its really true love you wont need to play hard to get. you both will want each other.

 

I agree with you and I'm only 25. For me all of these tactics should be used if you want to play games. What's the point of playing games with someone that you really care about? I want the person I want to be with to realize they want to be with me because they love me, and not out of jealousy or impulse. Eveyone says no contact is the best way, but isn't that sending the wrong signal as well? My girl broke up with me because she said something was missing in her life and she's not happy inside. Being with me just masked her unhappiness with herself. How do I handle that? I don't want to play games and completely cut her off because I honestly care about her.

[rkman]

I agree with you and I'm only 25. For me all of these tactics should be used if you want to play games. What's the point of playing games with someone that you really care about? I want the person I want to be with to realize they want to be with me because they love me, and not out of jealousy or impulse. Eveyone says no contact is the best way, but isn't that sending the wrong signal as well? My girl broke up with me because she said something was missing in her life and she's not happy inside. Being with me just masked her unhappiness with herself. How do I handle that? I don't want to play games and completely cut her off because I honestly care about her.

 

She needs to be alone, literally. You employ no contact, with the intention not to play a game, but to assist her in becoming the woman she strives to be. Most of the time, when a girl is searching for something within herself, she will be selfish and afraid. At this time, she needs to be alone, she needs to have a clear picture. BEing in the picture may in fact help her, I don't know her or you, but it is most likely to be destructive to both of you. During this time, it is time for you to look inwards on yourself, go into a cacoon and find out what you want as well. Take your time to find out how you could be a better person. If you know what it is that you want, then never forget it. The hardest thing to do for someone you love is what's best for them.

 

Generally, allowing her time alone, will be what's best for her. She will make bad decisions during this time, but have faith in her humanity, that she will learn and find her way back onto the tracks.

[RealBroken]

She needs to be alone, literally. You employ no contact, with the intention not to play a game, but to assist her in becoming the woman she strives to be. Most of the time, when a girl is searching for something within herself, she will be selfish and afraid. At this time, she needs to be alone, she needs to have a clear picture. BEing in the picture may in fact help her, I don't know her or you, but it is most likely to be destructive to both of you. During this time, it is time for you to look inwards on yourself, go into a cacoon and find out what you want as well. Take your time to find out how you could be a better person. If you know what it is that you want, then never forget it. The hardest thing to do for someone you love is what's best for them.

 

Generally, allowing her time alone, will be what's best for her. She will make bad decisions during this time, but have faith in her humanity, that she will learn and find her way back onto the tracks.

 

 

Thank you.

[JDREW311]

Thank you.

 

I know that's what I need to do, but it's so hard to give someone you've been with everyday and are used to seeing, their alone time. This is a girl that always wanted me around and constantly said I make her feel so good about herself, which is something no one has ever done for her. Her previous boyfriend was controlling and mentally beat her down, but she was with him for a year and a half. I talked to her a week ago for an hour and the next day she said she was so happy we talked and if I ever need anything, just give her a call. So, I called her a few days later and now she's not calling me back. This is why I'm confused. She tells me to call, but when I do she doesn't answer or call back. This is so crazy. What do I do?

[donpepot]

i dont know what is the case with pink amulet maybe when she dump those guys maybe all of them beg till the end,maybe there all jerks or in rebound relationships or when they split they exchange damn painfull words and curses on their last fight...who knows..if those scenarios happened it might not change her mind for good...but i like what thekhris said

Women don't usually feel the love until it's GONE. And they will take the good or most emotional parts of each particular relationship and hold on to them...giving her the feeling of love..sort of like when you listen to a song and it brings back memories. She even remembers the niceguy days.

 

Unless the guy is a rebound relationship, extremely unattractive, or is a 100% complete jerk, this usually happens:

 

 

Girl dates guy A (niceguy)...good relationship, she gets bored and gets with guy B

 

Girl dates guy B ...good/decent relationship, girl thinks about guy A. Girl obsesses over guy A and breaks up with guy B. Guy A has already moved on.

 

Girl dates guy C(player) ...but remembers how good it was with Guy B. Guy C recognizes this...breaks up with her and moves on. Girl is upset and wants to prove she can get guy C, but in the mean time...

 

Girl dates guy D ...but is still in love with C... girl breaks up with guy D and wins guy C back.

 

Girl gets bored of C and is interested in guy E, F, and G because they give her attention. Girl gets with guy F, but has feelings for guy E and G.

 

Girl is still in love with A, B, C, and D.

 

 

The End.

exactly ....unless the guy is in rebound relationship,extremely unattractive or 100% complete jerk...this tips might not work...

[whir]

i almost cried when i read this tread...damn..... i love this site

[Pink Amulet]

Tears of laughter or sadness?

[Diver012]

An excellent post about teh Guy A B C D E.. ect...

 

I have personally witnessed this happening to my Ex's daughter. She was going with Guy A... Guy A is a player... Guy A hurts Girl. Girl immediately Dates Nice Guy B. NiceGuy and Girl date and have a nice few months together.

 

Girl hears from Guy A and starts to miss him. Girl dumps Nice GuyB and gets back with Guy A.

 

Learned behavior I think from Mom...

[ronnieromance]

I think the interesting thing to see also, is that guy C wasn't always necessarilly a player. He was probably guy A at some point, until too many Girl 6s made him jaded.

 

Of course, there are those guys that were like that from the time they started dating. It usually happens because they take their mothers' cooing and words about how wonderful they are a little too much to heart.

 

 

 

-R-

[Diver012]

I think the interesting thing to see also, is that guy C wasn't always necessarilly a player. He was probably guy A at some point, until too many Girl 6s made him jaded.

 

Of course, there are those guys that were like that from the time they started dating. It usually happens because they take their mothers' cooing and words about how wonderful they are a little too much to heart.

 

 

 

-R-

 

yeah but im wonderful! Does that make me a player too??

[thekhris]

i think being a player knows the rule and knows how to deal of the game named love... player is not a person that always cheat... but people who really know how to do things right...

 

they can read woamns minds..they know if its safe to be in love with a certain person..they know how to handle each...scenarios that normally people have no idea what the hell is going on..

[thekhris]

I think the interesting thing to see also, is that guy C wasn't always necessarilly a player. He was probably guy A at some point, until too many Girl 6s made him jaded.

 

Of course, there are those guys that were like that from the time they started dating. It usually happens because they take their mothers' cooing and words about how wonderful they are a little too much to heart.

 

 

 

-R-

exactly...most of players...specially the avrage looking guys are once nice guys and wuss..been dump..rejected..and hurt so badly..

and that drives them to study..to research...and to make better of thems selves...i have a friend whos poring every model in womans magazines...hes been rejected and dump and a total wuss on his early stage..but now his a damn palyer..his not a cheater...but he is damn good in everything and every girl love him...now he dumps models...lolz