Billy Posted November 6, 2001 Share Posted November 6, 2001 If you did something wrong which made your loved one don't trust u anymore, what to do? The case is : I sometimes say things to test her, but ended up confused her making her find it difficult to decide which versions of my words are the truth.. and now it comes to the case that my trustworthiness and my ethics are a doubt to her...I am depressed.. pls help... Link to post Share on other sites
arthropod98 Posted November 6, 2001 Share Posted November 6, 2001 well, you can't FORCE someone to trust you. you can do things to attempt to earn their trust, but you just can't force them. why are you testing her?? if you've got issues with things she's doing or saying, then ASK her about it! if you love her, and she loves you, then she should be FINE with that. this "games" and "tests" stuff just doesn't work. you could possibly try explaining to her why you were testing her, but she may take offense. i'd recommend just NOT doing this stuff anymore . . . let her see that she can trust you on her own! If you did something wrong which made your loved one don't trust u anymore, what to do? The case is : I sometimes say things to test her, but ended up confused her making her find it difficult to decide which versions of my words are the truth.. and now it comes to the case that my trustworthiness and my ethics are a doubt to her...I am depressed.. pls help... Link to post Share on other sites
Carrie Posted November 6, 2001 Share Posted November 6, 2001 Well, being a female. I always say actions speak louder than words. If you tell her you love her, but never show her, then she'll take it as you're full of it. If you show her, instead of always just telling her, then she'll slowly be able to believe you and hopefully trust you again. It will take a while, but if you really love this girl, then it will be worth it. By the way, stop playing games and say what you mean, stop trying to confuse her, she's not a toy, but a human with feeling and a mind. She'll end up walking away forever if you don't start treating her like a friend and a person. Link to post Share on other sites
The Girl Posted November 6, 2001 Share Posted November 6, 2001 I just wanted to respond to something you said. You said that you tell her things that may not be true to "Test Her." From that key phrase it seems as though her not trusting YOU now is not the only problem. By you needing to test HER, it sounds as though you need to work on trusting her so you dont have to "Test" her. If you trusted her you would not be doing this. This may not stem from any legitimate doubts on your part, but may just be issues that you need to face. Mark my words, if you keep doing this it will RUIN your relationship if it hasn't already. I had a guy that did this to me and these "Tests" gave birth to a whole bunch of negative emotions (jealousy, lack of trust,her playing games back, etc.). You are starting a nasty cycle. Tell her that you were testing her,your sorry, and STOP doing it. After a while the trust may come back..or like in my case..it won't. If you want to play games kiddo, know that you just may lose sometimes.... Link to post Share on other sites
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