ConfusedGal Posted June 12, 2006 Share Posted June 12, 2006 If people have read some of my previous posts, they know that I have been dying to move away and explore the world.... I keep saying its because I want to get away from my mother as she has made my life miserable, but I think its more than that... BTW, I am 27, an attorney, and married to a 32 year old many for the last 3 1/2 years. I got married at 23. Anyways, I have been seeing a psychiatrist about my life issues, especially those with my mom, and I mentioned to her how I really would love to move away and all, but because my husband just got a promotion and now wants to buy a house, I feel "stuck"... So she said, my main reason for feeling so stuck is that I have never had a period of "autonomy"...The time period in your 20's when you "grow up," explore the world, and have no limits... She said "You went straight from being your mom's daughter to being someone's wife. There was no bridge." This is so true... I got married at 23 and straight up until that point, had SO many problems because of my mother...grew up in a home where I was always scared of my parents fights all alone (brother far away in college.) Have always had those problems and they continued straight into my marriage... I really do feel this way... I MISSED out on the time I should have had. I love my husband. I reallly do. But having not had that time, maybe that is why I just want to move away and explore...I have no interest in having kids anytime soon or buying a home or any "adult" like decision... I feel like that stuff ties me down. I am trying to cope with all of it... Does anyone else feel like they just missed out? Link to post Share on other sites
crazy_grl Posted June 12, 2006 Share Posted June 12, 2006 No I don't feel like I missed out. I moved out of my mom's house when I was 18 to live a few hundred miles away. After college, I moved half way across the country and I've been single now for over 2 years. Would I trade that independence and growing up phase for what you have? Maybe, maybe not. There are a lot of benefits to what you've got. Should you trade what you have? I wouldn't recommend it, especially not without giving your husband the chance to be a part of your self-exploration. If you've found a great guy, hold onto him, because one thing you've "missed out" on is dating a whole lot of jerks to get to the good guy. If you want to get out and travel, explore, etc. tell your husband that. Maybe he wants the same thing. Link to post Share on other sites
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