What is the big deal?

[Guest]

Ok so my husband and I, have been married for 15 years. We have 3 wonderful kids. We have been talking about either me getting fixed becasue I don't really want to stay on BC pills anymore, or maybe him getting a vascetomy. We decdied he is going to get the vasectomy. He doesn't seem to have a prblem with it, and if its what he wants to do thats fine. I think what matters is if its what we both want to do, however, I was talking with a friend of mine about this, and she flipped out! She says she thinks its cruel!? WTF? How is it cruel? I explained to her this was something we both have been talking about for awhile now and it was his decison to have it done.

 

She tells me she understands, but that there is no way she would ask that of her husband. First of all I didn't really ask him, it was brought up as a mutaul conversation on the matter. I told her men have it done alot and its not a big deal. She then tells me she thinks it would make her husband feel less of a man for having it done. I asked her if they had talked about it before and how it is she knows for sure it would make himn feel less of a man. She says no thats not something they would discuss, and that she just Knows he would feel like that. Chances are its probably HER that would feel like that. So even though my husband and I have decdied to do this, my friend has now made me feel like s*** because of it. Its not her business I know. How is it that its cruel? I don't get it.

[whichwayisup]

Don't let her make you feel like s***. HER opinion shouldn't affect the choice you and your husband make. It's NONE of her business. PERIOD.

 

How the F does she know how her husband would feel if they've never discussed it??? She's ASSUMING...

 

Anyway, try not to let it get to you.

 

How is it cruel? I don't know. But I tell ya, if a man says he doesn't wanna get a V, and he makes his wife get her tubes tied, I think THAT is cruel. It's a major operation for a woman, it isn't for a man.

 

My joke...

 

What's the defination of a Macho Man?

He jogs home after his own vasectomy....

[Outcast]

She sounds as though she thinks her husband's a pet or something. Thinks it will be 'cruel' for him to have a vasectomy. Doesn't talk to him about things but tries to figure out what he wants - I guess by looking at his eyes and his wagging tail or something. And you let this nutjob bother you?

 

Presumably your husband has a mind of his own, which he's entitled to make up as he wishes. Too bad she won't allow her own spouse the liberty of deciding for himself.

[PandorasBox]

I agree with the others. Its none of her business. If this was something that was agreed upon between you and your husband and you all are ok with it then it shouldn't matter. I don't think its cruel either. Does she think its cruel if a woman gets her tubes tied or has a hystrectomy? She sounds kind of uneducated.

[Buttaflyy]

This is a decision between you and your husband only! You shouldn't let her make you feel bad for it. He doesn't feel bad about. If it's no big deal to him then it's no big deal!

[reservoirdog1]

Speaking as a guy who's had the big V, your friend hasn't a clue what she's talking about. It's not cruel; the way I had it done took 15 minutes, no stitches, only topical freezing, hardly any pain (really just a bit of discomfort). Just had to stay off my feet for a day, take anti-inflammatories when needed, and not exert myself too much for about a week.

 

Besides, I understand that female sterilization is a lot more complicated and invasive.

 

Oh, and it's nothing to do with feeling like "less of a man". It doesn't mess with the functioning at all. Your H will still be able to get it up; the ONLY difference is that he won't be able to impregnate you. Other than that, you won't notice any difference.

 

Besides, you pushed your H's children out of your body... him having a V isn't a big deal by comparison.

 

Also... it's kinda cool to be able to git bizzy without worrying about "accidents".