How Long Does Love Last?

[sirjay]

If two people are deeply in love and have to part ways, how long does it take for the feelings for that person to die, do you think?

 

I have read all kinds of different opinions on this. I know some people think that it takes at least a year for women and 1.5 years for men. Some people theorise it takes half the time that relationship lasted for. Some people feel it never dies.

 

I have been apart from my ex of 3 years for 4 months now and she is still very much in my heart and thoughts.

 

I recently started speaking to my ex from 7 years ago and i dont feel any strong attachment there but i really didnt love her anymore when we parted ways.

 

I am interested to hear other people's past experiences in this matter

[NightsInWhiteSatin]

no idea,

 

My ex dumped me even though he still loved me....just couldn't see me anymore with his work etc....if that was the real reason.

 

It's been erm 2 and a half months.....i think about him alot but not in a 'i miss you way' more of a 'why did i let you treat me that way and how could you treat me that way' manner.......don't think i love him anymore....but then again i dunno.....he didnt break up with me to my face.....so who knows, maybe my true feelings will surface from under the confusion when and if i see him again....don't particually want to see him again...

 

So yeah, love when it was there didn't come through for me....i was told i was loved but never showed. Do i know what love is? All i know is i can't wait for it to go and i never want to go there again!

[horsekiss]

if you were in love in a true sense of the word

i would say you will never stop loving them!

 

i am in 3 months of nc

wow its tough

i think of him all the time

the first 2 months were hell-couldnt eat sleep or anything else

sought councelling and read books galore

 

the pain is a tiny bit less but my love for him will never leave

i was with him for 8 years

wanted to be with him forever but

he dumped me

left without a word

scared to make the most important step of his life

 

i read somewhere that for every year its 3 months of grieving

but who really can put a time on it

some jump right back on the horse

i myself wont be ready for that for at least another 3-4 months!

[Guitar Wizard]

True love is as eternal as time itself. However, if you don’t believe in true love, you can never find it.

[Kengne]

I can't remember where I heard this, but smo once told me it would take 1/2 the length of the rel'ship to mourn/grieve the breakup and for the feelings to die.

 

eg if you were w smo for 4 years, it'll take you 2 years to 'get over it'.

 

NOTE: I don't nec agree with the above saying, because I have had LTRs end abruptly & I got over them REAL quick, and then i've had short rel'ships which took a loong while to get over. Crazy.

 

K.

[RealBroken]

I was oly with my ex for 7 months.

I KNOW im in love, she claimed she was and that i had a spell over her etc, perfect for her, wanted to spend her life with me, loved me more than i loved her etc...... she then became "confused" ....broke up with me,....... cried over the phone, sent me i miss u texts for one week, then BANG she's with someone else.

Its a nice thought that love could last that long, as that means she does still love me, but how can she be with this guy.

Is hard to comprehend how she can be with him, when its the last thing i feel like doing, it would seem wrong, almost like i wld be still cheating, just because i still have such strong feelings.

Maybe its a rebound, but it seems all serious and stuff.

I just dont understand.

Some help would be good.

I love her still so much, 2 months of no relationship, 6 weeks of No Contact,...knowing shes with someone else,..... its killing me. i really did and still do love her. Its horrible.

I'm trying so hard but it wont go away.

I know Im gonna run into her soon at the bars, and she's gonna be with him. Its gonna be hard on me. Will it be hard for her? or has she forgotten. People might say, oh she cant of loved u really,........ but thats definately not what she showed me . God i miss her. Just cant comprehend.

[Butterflying]

Based on the pattern from my past relationships, it takes three years for me to get over someone. But I'm not officially over them until I love someone else.

 

I dated a guy for seven months and was totally in love with him. He left me for someone else. I waited for him and hoped he would come back to me for three years until I finally met someone else. Then I forgot all about the other guy.

 

I dated the new guy for a year. I dumped him for various reasons. It's been almost three years since that relationship ended. I'm still not over him. I have thought of him EVERY SINGLE DAY since the day he left. I've dated several men since then. None of them replace the love I have for my XBF. I'm soo afraid that I will never love another person as much as I love him. And it hurts that he doesn't love me. I wish I didn't love him. But these feelings are beyond my control.

[Tony T]

There is absolutely no known formula. It's different for everybody and most likely based on the length and intensity of the relationship and the personal emotional constitution of the individual. The amount of support and whether or not counselling is obtained could play a part as well.

 

Every individual copes with loss in their own private way.

[Bogun]

I still love an ex that I split with over a year ago, although I never want to be with her again. Perhaps real love never dies, we just push it somewhere inside us where it wont hurt us anymore.

[Tony T]

Perhaps real love never dies, we just push it somewhere inside us where it wont hurt us anymore.

 

Very profound and quite a plausible theory!