A very difficult one

[legoals]

I'm in a difficult position here.

 

There's this girl I've liked for a long time now. I'm in first grade in high school, and already in our first class, I felt that she liked me. I felt that she was looking straight at me that time, and after a few days she sat down next to me and started talking to me during class. She was telling me jokes and laughed and totally ignored her friend who she was actually cooperating with. Even though I didn't show any interest that time and didn't talk too much in return, she did approach me several times after that, and I really started to like her. Some of my friends even told me they thought she was interested in me. However, I was shy and lacked self-confidence, so I didn't try to approach her, and we didn't talk to each other in a long time. Somehow, after a while, she got my email address, and we've been IM-ing with each other a lot since that time, during class at the school's computers or at home. I've felt that she's been looking at me a lot at school; however, when I've tried to approach her, she's been looking another way, pretending she didn't see me. I believe she just was a little shy.

 

The last months it has changed very much. If I approach her now, she won't ignore me anymore. We can in fact have short conversations with each other IRL, but I believe she's still a little shy. She doesn't say too much when we meet each other, she usually just smiles or waves to me.

 

Lately we had our little argument over IM. I accused her of ignoring me again (I know, I shouldn't have done it), and it seemed like she became really angry. I told her I was sorry for it, and that the reason why I overreacted was because I loved her and really got depressed when I couldn't talk to her. It was the first time I've ever told it to her. She told me she was suprised when reading it, and that she already was seeing someone else that she liked. The strange thing, however, is that she didn't want to tell me who, because it would be over anyway soon.

 

Now, I know that there is a chance she's telling the truth. However, I wonder if she might be doing it because she doesn't want to admit it yet, if she wants to make me a little jealous, or if she's just making herself a little costy.

 

Any bright ideas?

[Guitar Wizard]

First grade in highschool? AKA Freshman.

 

Well, let me shed some light on this situation.

 

You see, first off, you don't love her. I know you probably think you do, but love is infinitly more complex then your first taste of it. What you have is a strong Infatuation with her, because you've never had a chance to experiance what love really is yet.

 

I know you probably hate hearing the phrase "Your too young to understand", I did too, heck im only 18, Im still too young to understand a lot of crap, but Im getting to the point where I have a genral idea.

 

Anyway, I hated that phrase when I was younger, but now that i've passed through those years of high school I realized I was really too young to understand what love is and such. My first love was my Sophmore year. I had a couple of flings freshman year, one with a stoner Junior, (Crazy times...) but yeah...

 

Girls are hard to understand, and you really shouldn't devolop an attachment to where you NEED attention from her. Girls that age kinda like to chase boys down. Well... some do, some don't... augh, girls are hard at that age. They never quite know what they want, ect, it's just a really tough time to be alive.

 

The point is, she might have gotten the wrong idea from you telling her you love her, and you probably shouldn't have gone as far to say it. There isn't any way to "Retract" it, not to mention change your feelings for her, just understand your going through a phase in life where you think you know all the secrets to life and love, and that you and this girl can be together forever, ect..

 

But, the real world is a crewl place, where all the fairy tales of our youth no longer exist, save out minds.

 

So... Just be nice to her, be friends for a while, see where it goes. But don't try to openly persue a relationship, they always end awkwardly at that age. Trust me.

[pricillia]

I think that you should let this play out try not to rush things though. Everyone has to experience first love for them selves, I believe that you could love her after all anything is possible right. As far as being infatuated with her that is possible as well but you feel something for her and it is for you to figure it out. My first Love started when I was 13 years old lasted all the way through college. We were part of each others lives for a long time and I will always remember him fondly.

 

Don't listen to people tell you that you are not in love and you don't know what it is there are people who live thier whole lives and still ask that question.

 

As you go through life you grow and change and sometimes surprise yourself. You get hurt by your loves and you hurt your loves as well.

Love is exciting and wonderfull and all the things that go along with it.

have fun with your connection, just use protection and be kind!

 

Ps I used to call it first grade too!!! It is fun to put a different spin on things and think for yourself.

[legoals]

Ps I used to call it first grade too!!! It is fun to put a different spin on things and think for yourself.

Well, actually, I didn't have any other word for it. You see, in my country we have a completely different school system than in the US.

 

I've started to doubt if it's the same as high school. To make it more clear: I'm turning 17 years this summer.

 

And believe me, it's not my first crush. I've had several crushes which lasted for several months before I met her, so I know how it feels. And this one is not the same as the other ones. There just was something special about her.

[pricillia]

that is so sweet, enjoy it it may last and it may not so enjoy the moment and don't take it for grantid, you will be fine!

 

What makes this one different then the other "crushes"

[legoals]

Thanks for the replies.

 

She was just special. Unlike the other ones, this one I have things in common with: common opinions, common tastes, common friends, etc. The other ones I just felt a strong attraction to, and I really didn't like their friends.

 

I know I maybe rushed things too much, but she often told me how happy she became when I did certain things (sorry, but due to my anonymity, I don't want to tell what) and was kinda hinting that she liked me.

 

And yeah, I'll just play along and see what happens. If nothing else happens, I'll guess I'll just continue being friends with her.