curioussmith Posted June 21, 2006 Share Posted June 21, 2006 ok me and my girlfriend have been dating exclusively since Feb 05. We started out seeing eachother for about 2 months and then she went back to school in a different state. So we agreed not to see anone else while we were apart. We did the long distance relationship until Dec 05 when i moved to the same state to be w/her. While we were apart, she told me that her mom insisted she be on birth control and ordered her some pills. I was wondering why she needed birth control if she wasn't sleeping with anyone. She ensured me she wasn't sleeping with anyone and she was deeply in love with me. I believed her because we talked everynight for hours and text eachother throughout the day. And when we saw eachother periodically, we had the best sex ever. We still do to this day and we really enjoy eachother's company. She tells me everyday she loves me and i believe her because she gives me good support. But in Jan 06, her mom called her and told her that the doctor found the chlamydia STD. She said she didn't know how she could have gotten when she swears she didn't sleep with anyone else. I went to the clinic and was going to get tested myself but the lady told me that if i've had intercourse w/ someone who already has it, then i definitely have it. I took her word for it so instead of spending $ on the test, i spent it on the pills to cure it. What i want to know is, does it sound like she cheated on me during the time we were apart? I never really asked anyone because i love her and couldn't bear the thought of her being with another guy. I also thought that if she really had something to hide, she wouldn't have told me about the birth control or the chlamydia. At the first stage of our relationship, she did tell me that she had slept with a guy about a month before we met and started dating. I didn't trip because i slept with someone too a few months before. But am i in denial or does it sound like my baby could've been someone else's baby too Link to post Share on other sites
phyrespryte Posted June 21, 2006 Share Posted June 21, 2006 Well according to this site http://www.cdc.gov/std/Chlamydia/STDFact-Chlamydia.htm#HowGet Chlamydia can be transmitted during vaginal, anal, or oral sex. Chlamydia can also be passed from an infected mother to her baby during vaginal childbirth. If you weren't sleeping around she had to be. Sorry. Link to post Share on other sites
Bullgator Posted June 21, 2006 Share Posted June 21, 2006 Actually, the symptoms of Chlamydia can be quite mild. It's not uncommon for an infected individual to go many months without noticing. The possibility that she contracted it before she met you cannot be ruled out. ---------------------------------------------------------------------- Actually, I am a doctor. I just pretend not to be one on the internet. Link to post Share on other sites
luvtoto Posted June 21, 2006 Share Posted June 21, 2006 At the first stage of our relationship, she did tell me that she had slept with a guy about a month before we met and started dating. I didn't trip because i slept with someone too a few months before. That explains it. I am thinkin' that either you or her contracted it before you started dating. Link to post Share on other sites
Tim'sAngel Posted June 21, 2006 Share Posted June 21, 2006 I kept getting really bad UTI (Urinary Track Infections) on a regular basis, like once a month. I kept going to Doctors who couldn't find out what was wrong and I didn't have enough money to get a culture. One Dr told me that UTI's have the same symptoms as Chlamydia. I had been tested a few times before I got with my SO so I know I don't have it, and posted about it on LS and had alot of women say they were going through the same thing. Anyhoo, the point is the Dr. told me that women can just pass it off easily as a UTI because of the similarities in symptoms. Sometimes the symptoms are so light/nonexistant that one can go on for a long period of time without knowing they have it. It is a possibility she had it before you got together but simply didn't know it. I'm glad your being treated! I can't tell you if she cheated on you, only she knows that. I guess it could go either way. Link to post Share on other sites
j.carsey Posted June 21, 2006 Share Posted June 21, 2006 YOU could be the carrier of the disease. Have you had sex with anyone before her? If you did, and you have not ever had a STD screening, then for all we know you could have passed it on to her at some point. Or if she had previous sexual partners, then she might have been carrying the disease herself and not known about it. In which case it would have nothing to do with you and nothing to do with her cheating. The only way you could lay the blame on her is if you know that BOTH of you were clean of the disease. I'm guessing you didn't know that... so don't worry Link to post Share on other sites
Tim'sAngel Posted June 21, 2006 Share Posted June 21, 2006 Yea JC brought up a good point. It could have been you also. I'm guessing its all quite irrelavant now. The good thing is you both are getting treated and hopefully everything will be back to normal soon. Just make sure you both finish all the meds before engaging in sexual intercourse. Link to post Share on other sites
luvtoto Posted June 21, 2006 Share Posted June 21, 2006 Yea, what TA said! Eventhough there are little to no symptoms, it can cause either one of you to be sterile. Bad news!! Take this serious. (sounds like you are ) Link to post Share on other sites
j.carsey Posted June 21, 2006 Share Posted June 21, 2006 I don't know how the STD testing worked, but one thing I know several couples have done (and I'm about to do it myself too) is go together with your partner to one of those clinics that do free STI testing, if there is one in your area. You know everything, HIV, hepititus, the works. Medically speaking, it is a very good idea. There is no reason to be walking around infecting each other when in this day and age you can get properly tested and treated, often at little or no cost. I have several friends (and a sister) who is a doctor which is maybe why I see this as purely a medical thing, I guess some couples might not like the idea of getting tested together but when two people are sleeping together, you test them both Maybe a weirder thing I ask new partners is, are you carrying any infection I should be aware of... Link to post Share on other sites
Art_Critic Posted June 21, 2006 Share Posted June 21, 2006 I'm not quoting any sources or saying that I know the truth. But I had heard that chlamydia can and most times be dormant for a couple of years.. So she might have contracted it from a guy years ago and it has just shown up now.. With chlamydia don't judge her.. get educated on it first.. it is very possible that she hasn't cheated on you.. in fact likely with chlamydia Just my 2 pennies Link to post Share on other sites
luvtoto Posted June 21, 2006 Share Posted June 21, 2006 But I had heard that chlamydia can and most times be dormant for a couple of years.. I've heard that as well. Link to post Share on other sites
battleworn Posted June 21, 2006 Share Posted June 21, 2006 Yep, I'll back all this. Had a scare recently. I had unprotected oral sex with someone and convinced myself I contracted chlamydia. Turned out not to be the case. But I certainly got educated in a hurry. It can be carried for a long time without symptoms, so one or both of you could have brought it into the relationship. Even if you had protected intercourse it can be transmitted orally. Link to post Share on other sites
Spectre Posted June 21, 2006 Share Posted June 21, 2006 Seems like a double-edged sword. She could of contracted it before you began dating, thats quite a possibility, or she could of cheated on you. It sucks because even if she did cheat, she can hide behind the fact that it can lay dormant sometimes, which sucks. What would raise my suspicions is that she contracted this disease around the same time you two were having a LDR, which seems a little too coincidental that a dormant std begins to take effect during a period where she can cheat on you without you having a clue at all(besides the disease) If I were you and was in a loving relationship, I guess I'd just assume she got it before we were dating. However, if it happened during a time we were long distance, combined with the fact she felt the sudden need to get on birth control? I'd probably cut my losses, cuz you can never be too sure Link to post Share on other sites
blind_otter Posted June 21, 2006 Share Posted June 21, 2006 I had chlamydia for 8 months and never knew it until I went in for a routine pap. I got it from my exHusband, who slept with a bar skank and "lost the condom" while we were in the end stages of our marriage. I was in a new relationship at the time and had to tell my new partner I had the STD and he never did believe that I didn't cheat on him and we broke up about it. But I had it for almost a year with no symptoms whatsoever, so there ya go. Link to post Share on other sites
Author curioussmith Posted June 22, 2006 Author Share Posted June 22, 2006 yeah everyone, i'll just leave it at that. If she cheated, i guess i'll never know. Even if she did, it obviously wasn't meant for me to find out so i'm going to leave it alone. I'm going to have to go based on trust and choose to believe she didn't. Yea, what TA said! Eventhough there are little to no symptoms, it can cause either one of you to be sterile. Bad news!! Take this serious. (sounds like you are ) i hope your'e wrong because i gottta have me a little curious smith junior to carry on the family name. I've never tried to get my girlfriend pregnant because i'm not ready for a family yet. I'm only 24 and still feel like i need to spread my wings a little more. She often talks about marriage but i not ready. Link to post Share on other sites
Spectre Posted June 22, 2006 Share Posted June 22, 2006 yeah everyone, i'll just leave it at that. If she cheated, i guess i'll never know. Even if she did, it obviously wasn't meant for me to find out so i'm going to leave it alone. I'm going to have to go based on trust and choose to believe she didn't. It's up to you man, but the fact that she suddenly got on BC and this happened when you were apart would kinda tip me off, you shouldnt just accept that this wasnt meant for you to know, maybe her getting the disease was a sign to let you know? dunno Link to post Share on other sites
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